


The College Experience

by Geishaaa



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drama & Romance, Dubiously Consensual Blow Jobs, M/M, Originally Posted on FanFiction.Net, Romance, Slow Burn, Underage Drinking, Underage Kissing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:20:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 68,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27301087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geishaaa/pseuds/Geishaaa
Summary: Fresh out of high school, nineteen year old Ichigo Kurosaki begins his first year at Karakura Town University and finds himself bunking with a seventeen year old child prodigy. He vows that, one way or another, he is going to solve the mystery that is Toshiro Hitsugaya....“But how did you know?”“Well, if we point out a girl like Rangiku and all you can see is her little friend over there…” Renji laughed, “then you definitely aren’t into girls.”Fair point....Old fic - FFN to Ao3 transfer
Relationships: Hitsugaya Toushirou/Kurosaki Ichigo
Comments: 33
Kudos: 52
Collections: IchiHitsu Ship Week and Archive





	1. Room 406

**Author's Note:**

> Alright I am transferring this from ffn – it’s about 4-5 years old so please forgive me :)
> 
> This will be an IchiHitsu human/college!AU. I was inspired by Kuroneko Hikage’s ‘Untitled Preface’.
> 
> WARNINGS: Rated Explicit, for sex scenes in later chapters, underage attraction, a scene involving dubious consent with a minor. Also will contain underage drinking and explicit language.
> 
> PLEASE NOTE: Okay, so I’ve discovered that the Northern Hemisphere has some strange academic years. Apparently Japan starts their academic year in April and ends the following March. I’ve decided to follow the Japanese year for this fic, but since I don’t know much about Japanese universities, this story will be based on what I know about western universities.
> 
> The artwork is a piece LethanWolf had commissioned for this story years ago! Unfortunately we've forgotten the artist's name but it is an incredible piece <3

* * *

406.

Ichigo Kurosaki looked at the paper in his hands and then back up to the sign on the door. 406 – His new dorm room number. This was it; the doorway to the next phase of his life – college.

Nineteen years old and fresh out of high school, Ichigo was beyond excited to begin studying subjects he was actually interested in and fully experiencing ‘the college life’ as he’d seen in movies and heard about from his older friends.

Karakura Town University (KTU) had the best science department in Japan and was one of the top schools world-wide, so Ichigo knew he was incredibly lucky to be accepted into such a prestigious school. KTU was also one of the richest schools out there and as a result, it only had the most recent, state of the art equipment and resources, and could afford to hire the best professors in their respective fields. It was by far the finest university that Ichigo could ever hope to put on his résumé.

Despite living on the other side of town, he chose to board at the school. Ichigo wanted the whole college experience; he wanted to live out of home, have a roommate, go to college parties, make new friends, get a part-time job and throw a football with his new best friend in the dorm hallways… okay, so maybe he’d seen too many movies but these were the best years of his life – according to his father – and he wanted to make the most of it. After university, his life would mainly be work, work, work.

Fumbling with the keys, Ichigo wondered what his new roommate would be like; would he be fun-loving and down to party? Would he be the smart type, like Uryu from school? Would he be loud and confident, or quiet and reserved? Ichigo pushed the keys into the lock, and took a deep breath.

Ichigo paused as another thought briefly passed over his mind; would he find his new roomie attractive? He had discovered in his last two years of high school that he spent more time thinking about boys than girls. It took him quite some time to discover what this meant and even longer to accept it. He had though, and so had his friends and family. He was very lucky to have made such good friends early in life; friends who would accept him no matter what his sexual preferences were.

Turning the key, Ichigo felt the lock slide back and with one more deep breath he pushed open the door. Taking his first steps inside, Ichigo took in his surroundings. It was a small room. There was an awful coloured (pale murky green) two-seater couch on his left which had a wooden coffee table in front of it and pointed to a small wall-mounted TV. To his right, a basic kitchenette supplied with a kettle, toaster, microwave and a half-sized refrigerator. In the only space left was a round kitchen table with four chairs around it. Three doors stood along the room walls; two along the back wall and one on the side near the kitchen. Overall the room was basic, but he loved it all the same; he could practically smell the independence.

“Can I help you?”

A deep, cool voice, tinged with mild annoyance and boredom, brought Ichigo’s attention to the kitchen table, where a young boy sat in front of a pile of books and papers. The boy’s age struck Ichigo first; he was perhaps sixteen, maybe seventeen if he pushed it, but definitely too young to be in college.

The next thing Ichigo noticed was just how ridiculously gorgeous the boy was; stark white hair and large teal eyes. It was an unusual combination indeed, but certainly breathtaking. He was also wearing reading glasses with wide, thick black rims, which, to Ichigo, made him look all the cuter. The boy looked small too, from his seated position; narrow shoulders, toned slender arms and dainty hands.

“Oh um, hi,” Ichigo forced himself to respond. “I’m Ichigo Kurosaki. I’ve been assigned to this dorm.”

The boy narrowed his eyes as he regarded Ichigo, his pen tapping lightly against his lips. Ichigo shuffled awkwardly under the boy’s scrutinizing gaze; silence filled the tiny room.

“Um, are you…” Ichigo cleared his throat. “Are you Toshiro Hitsugaya?”

Toshiro Hitsugaya was the other name on his dorm room information paper, and his supposed new roommate… but this was a young teenage boy in front of him, he couldn’t possibly be… although, from Ichigo’s viewpoint, it did look like he was studying something a little more serious than middle school maths.

“I am,” the boy – Toshiro – finally answered after what seemed like a lifetime of silence. “One comment on my age and/or height and you’ll be sleeping outside for the rest of the semester.”

Ichigo gulped and nodded sharply; it was as though the kid knew what he was thinking. There was something about the boy in front of him, something that made him seem older and wiser than he physically was. There was also a dark glint in his eyes – a peculiarity that told Ichigo to be weary. He wouldn’t want to be on bad terms with his new roommate anyway.

“Good,” Toshiro smirked. “Your room is that one there behind the couch, mine is the one behind me and the bathroom is on your right.”

Toshiro pointed around the room as he spoke, and then returned to his studying like Ichigo had never come into the dorm in the first place; his eyes darting between the text book and his written notes, his pen flying across the page at an incredible speed. Ichigo lent over the table to see what he was working on; it appeared to be some sort of science.

“Is there something else you need, Kurosaki?” Toshiro snapped, looking up to glare at Ichigo.

Wow, touchy.

“No, um, sorry?” Ichigo gave an awkward smile and stepped back from the table.

Toshiro continued to eye him off for an excruciatingly slow minute before returning silently to his work. Ichigo released a breath and wasted no time in picking up his bags and shuffling over to the bedroom door that was apparently his.

Entering quickly, Ichigo turned to face his new bedroom. Plain and simple, it was; just a double bed pushed up against the corner of the room with a bedside table on the other side, a small built-in closet on the opposite wall and a desk next to that. It was perfect. Well, it would be, once he gave it a little life.

A couple hours later and Ichigo was done. He took a step back to observe his work. He grinned; this room was definitely his now. He’d put photographs of his friends and family up on the wall beside his bed and a giant poster of his favourite rock band above wear he’d lay his head every night. He’d put deep purple sheets on his bed and set up his bedside table with all his essentials; his phone charger, alarm clock, car keys and the book he was currently reading. He’d put his clothes in the closet and even gone so far as to lay his textbooks, notebooks and laptop out on the desk, all ready for class tomorrow.

Feeling his stomach churn, Ichigo glanced at his alarm clock. It was just after six. He’d planned to meet Chad – his only friend from high school to board at the university – at the dining hall around half six. Throwing on a jacket, Ichigo sent a text to Chad to let him know he was on his way down.

Despite knowing nothing about his new roommate, Ichigo was somehow unsurprised to find that the young boy had not moved from his position at the kitchen table and was just as furiously scribbling down notes as he was when Ichigo first arrived.

“I’m going to get some dinner,” Ichigo stated. “Are you coming down?”

“No,” Toshiro answered curtly, not looking up from his work. “I’m too busy tonight.”

Ichigo didn’t know how he could be so busy considering classes hadn’t even started yet, but he decided not to push the subject.

“Okay, see you later then,” Ichigo responded awkwardly and headed towards the door.

Toshiro did not reply.

* * *

Ichigo saw Chad over the crowd of students coming to get dinner. It was hard to miss the large Mexican who towered over everyone. Waving him over, Chad spotted Ichigo right away; Ichigo himself was also rather easily noticed in crowd due to his shockingly orange hair.

Behind the Latino came a tall – but still way shorter than Chad – guy with long red hair tied back into a spiky ponytail. He wore a white bandana on his forehead and simple white tee with dark blue jeans.

“Ichigo,” Chad greeted softly, sitting at the table opposite him. “This is Renji – he’s my roommate.”

As Ichigo shook hands with Renji, he just knew that they’d become good friends, especially when Renji pointed to Ichigo’s shirt and screamed “I love that band!”

As the three of them ate, they got to know more about Renji Abarai. He was a second year student studying electrical engineering and hoping to one day get a job at Kuchki Industries – Japan’s number one power provider. He had just turned twenty, and was a bit of rough nut; he played for the university’s basketball team and also joined the karate club.

“Oh god, and there was this one time, I swear- Oh fuck!” Renji cut off his story mid-sentence as he spotted something over Ichigo’s shoulder.

Glancing over his shoulder, Ichigo could not see what was disturbing his new friend. Renji’s face had turned a furious shade of red and the man was looking down at his food, head ducked low as if he was hiding from something.

“Dude, what’s wrong?” Ichigo asked, swapping confused looks with Chad.

“Oh he just saw yet another beautiful woman who scares him shitless.”

Ichigo’s head whipped in the direction of the newcomer’s voice. Two men approached; a blonde whose hair flopped over his left eye and a tall brunette with the number ‘69’ tattooed on his left cheek. They rounded the table, the blond taking a seat next to Ichigo and the brunette coming to sit next to the now spluttering Renji.

“I’m Shuuhei Hisagi,” the dark-haired man who had spoken before greeted with a sly smile, “and this is Izuru Kira.”

“We’re the pineapple’s friends,” the blonde – Izuru – added while gesturing casually to Renji.

Ichigo laughed as Renji – or the ‘Red Pineapple’ as he soon became known as – began growling out obscenities.

“I told you not to fucking call me that!”

Ignoring Renji completely, Ichigo introduced himself and Chad to Izuru and Shuuhei. Izuru was a nice guy, kind too. He seemed a little shy, except when it came to making fun of Renji. As it turned out, Izuru was doing the same course as Renji and was also in second year. Shuuhei, on the other hand, was studying Journalism and was in his third year. He was confident and apparently a bit of a ladies man, but Ichigo could tell that the guy had a good heart.

“So what are you guys studying?” Izuru asked, taking a sip of his soda.

“I’m studying medical science,” Ichigo responded, “but I’m hoping to transfer into post-graduate medicine after the course is done. I want to be doctor.”

Ichigo had always wanted to be a doctor, since as early as he can remember. His father was a doctor and ran a small practice at their home. He spent more time fighting his dad now, but when they worked together with patients or had serious medical discussions, Ichigo felt closer to his dad and he wanted to make him proud. More than that, he wanted to help people and save lives. His name meant ‘protector’ and that’s exactly what he wanted to do.

“I’m studying social welfare,” Chad provided when it was his turn.

He didn’t expand much on that point and nobody asked him too. Ichigo knew Chad was hoping to one day work with disadvantaged children and make sure all kids had good homes to go to. It came from losing his grandfather – and legal guardian – at a young age and then slipping through the cracks of state care. He didn’t talk often of his time before he met Ichigo, but the strawberry didn’t think it was pretty, considering they met during a gang fight.

It seemed as though Renji was going to say something before he clamped up again and began choking on his food. Spraying his mouthful onto his plate, Renji downed his cup of water like his life depended on it and once again ducked low as if he wanted to avoid being seen. Shuuhei erupted into outrageous laughter at his friend’s misfortune.

“Okay, who is the girl that’s making him stupid?” Ichigo asked Izuru, while Renji glared daggers at Shuuhei.

“Ahh that would be Rangiku Matsumoto…” Izuru grinned, looking around the room. “Oh, there she is!”

Ichigo and Chad looked over in the direction Izuru was pointing. They had no problem spotting this ‘Rangiku’. She had long, toned legs, curvy hips with a tiny waist and what was surely the world’s largest bust for a woman her size. She had long strawberry blonde hair and was wearing a tiny pink dress. She was the woman of every man’s dreams…well, every straight man’s dreams, Ichigo supposed, since he was more drawn to the frowning boy by her side.

“Hey, it’s Toshiro!” Ichigo exclaimed, excited to see his stunning young roommate outside their dorm room.

“You know him?” Renji raised an eyebrow at Ichigo while the other three looked on in interest.

“He’s my roommate,” Ichigo answered, waving enthusiastically in Toshiro’s direction although the boy didn’t seem to notice him.

Renji’s look of confusion broke into an all-out grin as he shared what seemed to be a knowing look with his two friends.

“What?” Ichigo asked, eyes darting between Renji, Shuuhei and Izuru before looking at Chad for answers. The Mexican could only shrug.

“I wouldn’t have picked you as gay…” Renji smirked.

Ichigo could practically feel the colour draining from his face. How could they tell? They’d know each other for an hour!

“Oh relax, Ichigo!” Izuru laughed and patted him on the back. “We don’t care. We’re just good at reading the signs; Mine and Renji’s friend, Ikkaku, started dating Shuuhei’s friend, Yumichika, and that’s how we ended up becoming such good friends.”

Still incredibly embarrassed, but greatly relieved to not be rejected by his new friends, Ichigo asked, “But how did you know?”

“Well, if we point out a girl like Rangiku and all you can see is her little friend over there…” Renji laughed, “then you definitely aren’t into girls.”

_Fair point,_ Ichigo mused, glancing back over at the two in question. From this distance, it looked as though Rangiku was playfully teasing Toshiro, who seemed to ignore it with a look of resigned acceptance. Well, that was until Rangiku shoved his head into her ample bosom. The boy struggled for freedom but Rangiku’s grasp became visibly tighter.

Renji groaned, his face turning an even darker shade of red – if that was at all possible – as he dabbed a napkin against his now bleeding nose, “The things I would do to have her shove my face in there…”

“I’ve had my face in there,” Shuuhei whispered teasingly and poked Renji in the side, “Best day of my life.”

Renji looked as if he was about to punch Shuuhei right in his smirking face.

“Are they dating?” Chad asked Izuru as he looked upon with mild interest.

Ichigo returned his focus to Izuru, keen on hearing the answer to that question. It was odd, but he found himself really hoping that they were just friends.

“No,” He chuckled. “We thought they were for most of last year, but I’m dating Hitsugaya’s cousin, Momo, and she told us they were just friends. Albeit, closer friends than most.”

“That, and Rangiku is dating Gin Ichimaru now…” Shuuhei added, once again prodding Renji with a chopstick.

Ichigo swore he heard Renji mutter something like ‘lucky bastard’ under his breath before stabbing his chopstick harshly into his chicken.

Laughing at his friend’s antics, Izuru went on to explain that Gin Ichimaru was a student last year. Izuru seemed to idolise the man who was former captain of the basketball team and graduated top of his course.

“Wait-” Ichigo interrupted, his mind back on his young roomie. “You said that you thought Toshiro and Rangiku were dating last year; surely he’s not a second year student?”

“Yep, second year,” Izuru confirmed, ignoring Ichigo’s dropped jaw. “He’s seventeen; a child prodigy and genius, KTU’s youngest student ever. Momo told me that he skipped most of grade and middle school.”

“You’re kidding me!” Ichigo exclaimed. “What’s he studying?”

Both second years and the third year student shrugged with an obvious lack of interest.

“Some area of science, I think,” Izuru supplied eventually. “He’s in mine and Renji’s maths class.”

Ichigo tried to pull as much information as possible out of his new friends about the apparent child prodigy. They didn’t know much more than what they had already told him, but they did know that he was a bit of a closed book. Toshiro didn’t have many friends and seemed to prefer it that way. He came across as cold and indifferent. Interestingly enough, Toshiro and Renji both did Karate together. Toshiro was black belt level.

“You like him, don’t you?” Renji demanded with a grin, his finger pointing accusingly at Ichigo.

“What?! No!” Ichigo spluttered. “I just met him!”

“Sure, sure,” Renji continued obviously unconvinced, while Izuru tried to cover his widening grin with a hand, Shuuhei chuckled into his soda and even Chad cracked a smile.

“Seriously, you pineapple! I just wanted to know what I’m getting myself into now that I live with the kid!”

The use of the hated nickname broke the focus on him as the others erupted into laughter and Renji screamed every swear word he knew. Shuuhei was once again nudging Renji’s side and the redhead finally cracked, pulling the budding journalist into a chokehold at the table.

Ichigo used the distraction to sneak another glance at the boy genius. Toshiro was playing with his food idly and listening to Rangiku’s expressive chatter with little interest. His face was expressionless, but his stormy eyes conveyed a certain type of emotion that Ichigo couldn’t quite place. Sadness, perhaps?

As if sensing that someone was looking at him, Toshiro raised his head and made direct eye contact with Ichigo. Ichigo whipped his head back around to face his friends faster than any of them could blink, but it was too late. He knew Toshiro had seen him staring. He didn’t have to turn back around to feel those wide teal eyes boring into the back of his skull from across the hall.

Ichigo counted down from a minute silently before turning back around to face his new roommate. Where Toshiro was previously sitting now remained only an empty seat. Rangiku had moved along a table to chat with some other girls but Toshiro had vanished from sight. Sighing, Ichigo vowed that, one way or another, he would get to the bottom of the mystery that was Toshiro Hitsugaya.


	2. First Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo's first day of college

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna lie, I am cringing a bit reading back through my old writing.

Ichigo’s alarm clock sung its loud and annoying tune to rouse its’ deep sleeping owner. With a muffled grunt, said owner lifted his hand out from the covers to his bedside table, hitting the furniture blindly in search of the offending noise. After almost losing his charging phone off the edge, Ichigo found the alarm clock and turned it off. He was now wide awake and in no need of the extra ten minute snooze.

 _The first day of college!_ Ichigo remembered with a jolt. A wide smile erupted over his features. He was excited, and nervous, but mostly eager to start classes and make new friends. He’d made two last night – three if you counted Toshiro – and couldn’t wait to catch up with them again.

Peeling the covers back, Ichigo forced himself out of the warm comfort of his bed and stood up, stretching the last of the tiredness out. He grabbed a bath towel and padded out into the living room.

Toshiro was already up, dressed and sipping on a rather large mug of tea. He was packing his books and reading glasses into his bag. He was clad in a pair of tight-fitting blue jeans and an old, oversized athletic hoodie with self-made thumb holes. It was charcoal grey in colour, and really pronounced the colour of Toshiro’s stunning cerulean irises.

“Good morning, Toshiro,” Ichigo almost sang in delight. “You’re up early this morning.”

“I’m going to the library,” was the blunt reply, “and I’d prefer if you called me ‘Hitsugaya’, Kurosaki.”

Ichigo supressed a chuckle; Toshiro was so tightly wound. He wondered if this was just a morning thing or whether Toshiro would be like this all day long.

“Are you coming down for breakfast, Toshiro?” Ichigo asked, clearly ignoring his roommate’s last request.

“It’s ‘Hitsugaya’, and no,” The boy glared.

Ichigo sighed and shrugged mentally. It was possible that Toshiro was going to take a lot of warming up, but he was prepared to meet the challenge. There was just something about him that Ichigo found special. He didn’t know what it was the compelled him to the boy so much, but he was going to take the time to find out. He had a feeling –call him crazy – he had a feeling that he and Toshiro were meant to meet; destined to be roommates for a greater reason.

On the other hand, he hadn’t had his morning coffee yet and that last thought could very well have been nonsense.

Toshiro stood to full height and, this being the first time Ichigo had stood next to him, Ichigo realised the boy came up to just below his shoulder. _So small,_ Ichigo thought, _but perfect for cuddling. WAIT WHAT?!_ Ichigo was shocked at himself for even thinking about his roommate like that.

Was Toshiro cute? Yes. Was he gorgeous? Of course… but that didn’t mean Ichigo could cuddle him, or even entertain the idea. This was his roommate, for goodness sake, not his boyfriend. Ichigo barely knew him; this was only their second conversation after all since Ichigo hadn’t seen him after dinner last night. Moreover, Toshiro was a kid; he was only seventeen. In addition to that, he probably wasn’t even gay! In fact, there was a real chance that Toshiro might not even know what his preference was; Ichigo didn’t at that age.

The worst part was that despite all that, Ichigo still had the urge to pick up the boy and cuddle him anyway. Well, not just cuddle, but also kiss and…

“I’m going to have a shower!” Ichigo exclaimed suddenly, whipping around and striding off in the direction of the bathroom. Feeling as his face heated from top to bottom, he didn’t miss the odd look his new roommate had given him.

From the safety of the bathroom, Ichigo could hear the heavy dorm door open and close again as Toshiro left for the morning. He took a deep breath to calm himself. What had gotten into him lately?

* * *

_I’m so fucking lost,_ Ichigo bolted along the hallways and up and down stairs with next to no idea where his morning lecture was. He had a room number and a map of the school, but unfortunately geography was not one of his better skills; he wasn’t even sure if he was holding the map the right way around. He was in the right building, he knew, but he was having trouble locating the actual lecture room.

“Hey you!” A feminine voice called as he sprinted by.

Ichigo turned around and back tracked towards the voice. A rather short girl, probably only a little taller than Toshiro, stood by one of the classroom doors in a white dress and denim jacket, with a tiny backpack hanging over her shoulders and a laptop tucked under her arm. She was quite pretty, with shoulder-length ebony hair and striking violet eyes.

“Are you looking for ‘Introduction to Anatomy’?” She asked, a kind smile gracing her lips.

“Yeah,” Ichigo puffed, trying to regain his breath after all that running. “Do you know where I can find room L12?”

“Yep,” The girl answered, tapping on the door frame beside her. “This is it. Apparently they renamed it at the end of last year but haven’t got around to updating the maps and timetables yet.”

Ichigo looked at the sign on the door which read ‘S6’ and frowned. How could the university not have updated the timetables and maps for all the new students? He prayed that this was the only room to be renamed otherwise he was going to have a long week trying to find his classes.

“Thanks,” Ichigo smiled gratefully at the girl who’d helped him, “Are you in this class too?”

The girl nodded, “I’m studying medical science.”

“Me too!” Ichigo exclaimed.

The girl smiled in return and gave him an enthusiastic high-five. Ichigo laughed in response. He was glad to have made a friend in his course so early.

“I’m Ichigo, by the way. Ichigo Kurosaki” He said as he led them into the lecture hall.

“Rukia Kuchiki.”

“Kuchiki? Any relation to-”

“Byakuya Kuchiki?” Rukia grinned, appearing to already know where this was going, “Yeah, he’s my brother.”

Ichigo’s jaw dropped. Byakuya Kuchiki was the CEO of Kuchiki Industries having recently taken over from his father. As one of the biggest Japanese companies, the Kuchiki family were royals in the business world. They were said to be the richest family in the country.

“No way!” Ichigo whistled. “Remind me to introduce to my friend, Renji. It’s like his dream to work for your brother.”

As the lecturer finally wrapped up his presentation 2 hours later, Ichigo felt as though he had just been punched in the face with information. There was so much content to learn in this subject, he was suddenly nervous that he’d never be able to retain and remember all the information being thrown at him.

Rukia sat beside him with a similar expression. At least he had her; doing the same course meant all of their core subjects would be the same. They could study together. She seemed smart and focused; she’d be able to keep him on track.

The lecture had been interesting, which was another thing he was grateful for. Ichigo was passionate about this course so he was motivated to keep up with the class and pay attention. His only problem was that he would often get fidgety if made to sit still for extended periods of time, and longed for when this class finally turned practical next semester. Ichigo was all too keen to don the white lab coats and play around with the cadavers. A little sick, he supposed, but the best way to learn.

“Are you thinking about joining any clubs?” Rukia asked as they packed their bags and shuffled out the door slowly with the crowd.

“Clubs? I haven’t really thought about it,” Ichigo replied, scratching the back of his neck in thought.

“You should consider it. Extracurricular activities always look good on a résumé and the university has a wide range.”

“Which one were you thinking of joining?” Ichigo asked.

Joining a club would be a good way to make friends, Ichigo considered, and also a way for him to get away from his studies when he might need a break. Rukia was right too; it did look good to employers.

“I don’t know,” Rukia responded, tapping her chin lightly, “I’ve always liked drawing so perhaps an art club? My brother is fond of calligraphy clubs so that’s another idea…”

Ichigo fought back a chuckle. He didn’t know Rukia all that well at the moment, but if her drawings were anything like the doodles in the margins of her notebook than the art clubs were in for a massive shock.

“The clubs have set up information stalls in the quad today,” Rukia continued. “Maybe we should go down and check them out during lunchtime?”

“Yeah, that’d be great,” Ichigo beamed.

* * *

“Oi Ichigo!” The way too loud voice of Renji boomed behind him. “Over here!”

Ichigo swivelled around from his spot beside Rukia. They were standing in front of a stall set up by the ‘Manga Club’ – a club dedicated to reading manga and writing/drawing their own. Rukia had yanked him over there; apparently she was quite the anime fan, and when combined with art it seemed like a dream come true for her.

He spotted Renji’s wild hair a few stalls over as the budding electrical engineer waved enthusiastically at him.

“Hey Rukia,” Ichigo turned back to his female companion. “I’ll be just over there, okay? Come over when you’re done.”

Rukia looked at where he was pointing and gave a sharp nod before returning to her discussion with the club leaders, her face lit up in excitement as she got the full run down of the club’s activities. Grinning to himself, Ichigo left her and made his way up to Renji.

“What’s up, Pineapple?”

“Not much, Strawberry!”

Ichigo’s head snapped up in Renji’s direction. He had been expecting Renji to over-react and growl out a few choice swear words, but instead he’d come up with his own awful nickname. Ichigo pouted; it wasn’t the first time he’d been called that in his life but he still hated it. His brightly coloured orange hair did not help his case in any way either.

“Fuck off,” Ichigo barked, although not really mad; he did kind of deserved it for calling his new friend a pineapple.

Renji only grinned in response and gave him a firm pat on the back.

“Thinking of joining a club?” Renji asked.

“Yeah,” Ichigo responded, scanning the stalls around him. “Not sure which one though.”

“What are you interested in?”

“I was thinking a sport or something else physical,” Ichigo responded having thought about it all through his second morning class,.“I want something to do when I’ve been sitting at my desk for too long.”

“You and I have that in common,” Renji laughed. “I joined the basketball team last year for that reason, and then karate when I felt like getting all my anger out.”

“Anger?”

“Girl troubles, y’know?”

Ichigo had to grin. No, he didn’t have girl troubles, but he knew what the redhead had meant.

“Hey, maybe you should join the karate club!” Renji suddenly exclaimed, mischief gleaming darkly in his eyes. “We could hang out and you could stare at Hitsugaya’s ass…”

Ichigo clapped a hand over Renji’s mouth and pulled him into a choke hold. The second year student was laughing uncontrollably, so much so that tears sprung from his eyes and his face turned a deep shade of purple from a lack of breath; a lack of breath that had nothing to do with Ichigo’s arm around his neck.

“Would you shut up?” Ichigo hissed, “I told you I don’t like him! I barely know him!”

After several more minutes, Renji eventually calmed down enough to apologise, although very unconvincingly, to Ichigo. Ichigo ignored him and gave joining the karate club some serious consideration. He’d done karate as a kid, but he’d been utterly terrible at it. Of course, he’d actually become a fair fighter now, what from all those ‘lessons’ from his father and the trouble he ran into as a young teenager, but he felt like he needed something else; a sport that was far less disciplined and more fast-paced, perhaps?

Explaining this to Renji, the tall redhead suggested a number of sports.

“Basketball?” – It was true he had the height for it and the stamina, but he’d only ever played it during P.E. at school.

“Soccer?” – Definitely more his sister’s area but still quite an energetic sport.

“Baseball? Rugby? American football? Tennis?” – None of these screamed out him.

“Look Ichigo, I think you should seriously consider trying out for the basketball team,” Renji sighed, seemingly giving up. “You’d be great at it. Quite a few of the players last year graduated, so there are spots open.”

“Maybe,” Ichigo shrugged, it was his best option so far.

“Just think about it this afternoon,” Renji pleaded. “The stalls are open all day today and tomorrow as well, so you’ve got plenty of time to decide.”

Ichigo sighed; yes, thinking it over was a good idea. He had to admit, basketball would probably be fun. He knew Renji and Izuru from the team already, so making friends might be that little bit easier. Still though, he’d never really been interested in basketball, having only played during sports class. He hadn’t been too bad, if he recalled correctly, but he’d always been quite good at most sports.

* * *

It wasn’t until around ten that night that Ichigo heard Toshiro enter the dorm room – correction; it was around ten that night that Ichigo _didn’t_ hear Toshiro enter the door, which was a significant factor in how he wound up in the situation he was in.

At first he thought that maybe the prodigy was studying in his room, but when he had returned from dinner and still not heard anything from Toshiro, he decided to check. He’d knocked and received no reply. Thinking that, perhaps, Toshiro might have been listening to music through earphones, Ichigo then figured he better open the door and see for himself whether his roommate was home or not.

He was greeted to an empty bedroom. At this point, any normal roommate would have shrugged and closed the door, but for some reason Ichigo lingered in the doorway taking in the appearance of Toshiro’s bedroom. _They say you can tell a lot about someone from the look of their bedroom,_ Ichigo grinned; this might be an opportunity for him to learn a little more about the young genius he lived with. As it turned out, this was another reason for his current predicament.

The first thing Ichigo noticed about the room was just how immaculately clean, tidy and organised it was. Ichigo couldn’t see a speck of dust anywhere. Furthermore, the boy’s desk was completely organised, which Ichigo considered to be a great feat considering the amount of books on it. Also on the desk, Ichigo saw a laptop, a framed photograph and a – _is that a boomerang?_

Doing a double take, and then forgetting his manners, Ichigo took a cautious step into the room. Slowly, as if expecting something or someone to jump out of him, he made it to the desk and began inspecting the items on it. He could hardly believe he was snooping around Toshiro’s room; he usually appreciated people’s privacy, as he liked his own to be respected by others, but here he was checking out Toshiro’s room with no good reason for his actions.

Ichigo found that it was, in fact, a boomerang that sat upon his roommate’s desk. Running a finger delicately over the fine pattern on its upward face before gently picking it up and flipping it over in his hands, Ichigo wondered why on Earth Toshiro kept this on his desk. Perhaps he’d recently been to Australia?

Shrugging if off for now, Ichigo continued his inspection of the desk. He picked up the framed picture next. The photo was of a much younger, but definitely unmistakeable, Toshiro – probably close to three or four years old – sitting in the lap of an old woman whom Ichigo assumed to be his grandmother. They were sitting together on a wooden porch of a small house and eating watermelon. Ichigo chuckled quietly as he took in Toshiro’s expression – the young child was grinning ear-to-ear, with a missing tooth at the front of his mouth, his eyes were lit up in pure joy.

With a fond smile upon his face, Ichigo gently returned the frame to its previous position, and turned his sights to the books the lined the back of the desk. They were mostly textbooks on science – most specifically, physics – and maths, but there were also a number of other books of various other genres; fiction, history, biography, sport. Ichigo realised that Toshiro was quite the soccer fan, with a few books on it and a large poster of the Japanese world cup team stuck to the wall above his bed.

Around his desk, Toshiro also had several more posters, but they were strictly science based by the looks of things, and obviously home-made. Ichigo ran his gaze over the different tables and diagrams that Toshiro had drawn and couldn’t help but admire the boy’s intelligence and dedication to his work.

“What are you doing in my room?” an irritated voice snapped from behind him.

And this was the problem he’d caused for himself.

Ichigo – whom had been leaning over the desk in order to get a better look at Toshiro’s periodic table – jumped back in shock of being caught red handed. In his haste, he’d knocked over Toshiro’s jar of pens and other miscellaneous stationary.

Ichigo shot forward again as he tried to catch the pens as they rolled over the desk, some threatening to fall off the edge. His mind was whirling in an attempt to find a good excuse for being in Toshiro’s room. The prodigy himself was standing in the door way; arms crossed and glaring, waiting patiently for an answer. _Silent but deadly._

“I, um – Well, I-” Ichigo fumbled around with the pens, trying desperately to collect them all and replace them to their former position. “I wanted to borrow a pen!”

Ichigo had blurted out his excuse, and held up a pen to Toshiro’s scrutinising gaze as if it was all the evidence he required. To be honest, he was quite proud of himself for coming up with it.

Toshiro remained silent as he looked Ichigo up and down, seemingly trying to decide whether or not to trust the inwardly panicking strawberry.

“Get out,” Toshiro growled, apparently not entirely convinced.

Ichigo’s heart sank a little. He didn’t understand why the guy seemed to hate him so much. Toshiro was yet to say something nice to him, or even smile. He always just seemed annoyed at him. Ichigo was a likeable guy, usually making friends off first impressions alone, but Toshiro seemed to think he was just some inconvenience he was forced to bunk with.

Ichigo let his smile visibly drop and sighed; placing the pen he was holding back into the jar and making his way out of the room, head hung. Toshiro said nothing as he side-stepped out of the way to let him through the door

Half way out the door, Ichigo heard Toshiro sigh behind him.

“Kurosaki.”

Ichigo turned around slowly to face his roommate. Toshiro eyes were closed, and he was pinching the bridge of his nose. Ichigo waited patiently for the boy – who seemed to be in the middle of a mental debate with himself – to speak again. Instead of talking, the white-haired prodigy stepped forward and plucked a pen out from his jar, and held it out to Ichigo.

“Keep it,” He said; his voice was barely above that of a whisper.

Shocked, Ichigo numbly lifted a hand to take the pen from Toshiro, and thanked him quietly. Slowly, ever so slowly, Ichigo could feel his heart warming and the corners of his mouth turning back up. Was this Toshiro actually being nice? Ichigo beamed at the genius who was refusing to meet his eye. Maybe there was hope for him yet…

“You can leave now,” Toshiro uttered, returning to his previous cold attitude.

“I’ll remember this,” Ichigo grinned stupidly, knowing that Toshiro’s brashness was just a façade to cover up his genuinely kind heart. Well, at least that’s what he assumed was happening.

“I doubt it,” was the instant retort. “You didn’t even remember to bring a pen to your first day of college.”

Ichigo smirked at Toshiro’s sarcasm-laced response. _So the guy does have a sense of humour._

“Good night, Toshiro!”

“Get out of my room, Idiot, and its ‘Hitsugaya’!”


	3. Due Tomorrow, Do Tomorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo is growing on Toshiro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now we hear from Toshiro!

Ichigo Kurosaki had been his roommate for a little over a month now, and Toshiro still didn’t know what to make of him. It was annoying him too, since he was usually rather adept at reading people.

On one hand, the orange-haired nineteen year old was possibly the most annoying person in existence, even more irritating than Rangiku – and that was saying something. Like this morning, for example, when Ichigo had gotten up even earlier than Toshiro and made him tea. Perfectly made, he might add. It infuriated Toshiro that the guy had worked out his morning routine and knew how he liked his morning tea. He wasn’t supposed to know stuff like that; he wasn’t supposed to get close enough to know stuff like that.

Toshiro was actually suffering a mild case of déjà vu as he recalled a certain busty woman worming her way into his life in a similar manner exactly a year ago. Actually, now that Toshiro thought about it, there were a lot of parallels that he could draw between his supposed ‘best friend’ and his new roommate. Happy, confident, unyielding in their quest to befriend him, and they even had similar hair colour.

He did have to confess, rather grudgingly, that his friendship with Rangiku had turned out well for him. Not financially, of course, since he often found himself roped into buying her lunch, a new scarf or whatever she fancies at the time – but on an emotional level. He hated to admit it, but he needed her companionship.

That being said, Toshiro already had his hands full with that friendship, and also with his studies and work, so he really couldn’t afford taking on another friend, especially one that snored and constantly tried to high-five him.

On the other hand, however, Ichigo was one of the few people at the university who didn’t treat him as a kid; one of the few who he didn’t have to prove his worthiness to. Ichigo treated him as an equal, maybe even higher than himself. Toshiro could recall the look of utter awe and admiration Ichigo had plastered on his face when Toshiro talked to him about his studies for the first time. Ichigo was so impressed to discover he was studying physics – majoring in astronomy, in preparation for his career as an astrophysicist – and that last year he’d topped his course. It had made Toshiro feel warm inside, in a way he couldn’t fathom.

That was another thing that bothered Toshiro immensely; the fact that Ichigo had some weird effect on him. The first time it had happened was when Toshiro had returned to the dorm late and found Ichigo snooping – none too discreetly – around his room. He tried to tell Toshiro that he’d been looking for a pen, but it was so obvious that he was lying, Toshiro wanted to punch him in the face. He’d snapped at him to get out of his room, and the look on Ichigo’s face was like a kick to the gut. Toshiro didn’t know why but he had felt the instant need to correct the situation or to, at the very least, turn that frown upside down.

It was a foreign concept to him, to want to make someone he barely knew smile, but for some reason Toshiro just could not bear to see the idiotic strawberry upset. Since that night, Toshiro had tried his best to be moderately nice to the guy – not too much or he’d get a big head – but enough to keep Ichigo happy.

He didn’t know what it was, but there was just something about Ichigo Kurosaki that was – for a lack of a better term – _special._

* * *

“Toshirooooooo!” Rangiku pouted from her place opposite Toshiro. “This is so hard! Can’t you do it for me?”

Toshiro released a frustrated sigh; they were only fifteen minutes in.

“Rangiku, you asked me to help you. If I do it for you, you’ll never learn.”

Rangiku frowned and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like ‘bastard’ under her breath before returning her gaze to the laptop in front of her.

They were sitting at the small kitchen table in Toshiro’s dorm with various books and papers scattered around them. Rangiku was supposed to be writing an essay for her marketing class. It was due tomorrow, but in true Rangiku fashion, she’d left it to the last minute and found that she didn’t understand the assignment topic or what she was supposed to write. She was in her third year of her business degree and still left her assignments to the night before, her motto being ‘Due Tomorrow? Do Tomorrow.’

“Why do I even have to do marketing?” She whined pitifully. “Can’t I hire someone else to do that when I start my own business?”

Rangiku’s dream was to one day open her own beauty and hair salon, which she planned to name ‘Haineko Hair and Beauty’, and build it up to be a national franchise with stores all across Japan. She had the practical skills of hairdressing, make-up, and nail therapy behind her, but the business component was seriously lacking, hence her enrolment at KTU.

“Marketing is a key component of business, so yes, you do need it.” Toshiro responded, glancing up at her briefly over his own work. “And yes, you could hire someone once your business takes off, but until then, you’ll have to do it yourself.”

Rangiku groaned and flopped dramatically across the table. It was only eight o’clock.

Toshiro smirked a little at her theatrical gesture as he twisted his chopsticks in his ramen. The food was his payment for helping her; she’d shout him dinner and bless him with a night away from the ruckus of the dining hall in return for a bit of tutoring.

“Help,” Rangiku pleaded with genuine stress in her eyes.

Sighing, Toshiro stood up and rounded the table to observe her progress. She’d highlight the topic on her assignment sheet, and started her essay with “I FUCKING HATE MARKETING!” typed four times down the page.

Good start.

“Okay, your topic is about the effects of developing technology on today’s marketing practice,” Toshiro began, pulling Rangiku back into a sitting position, “What can you remember from your lectures about it?”

“I remember that pregnant-looking professor say something about the internet!” She exclaimed happily. “He said that it’s changing the way businesses market and advertise now days.”

“That’s right, but how is it changing it?”

“It…its changing marketing by…um…I don’t know!” Rangiku frowned and buried her head in her hands.

“Rangiku, were you, by any chance, painting your nails during this class?” Toshiro questioned her seriously, recalling the big commerce assignment meltdown last year.

Rangiku threw him a withering glare before aggressively stabbing at her own ramen.

Toshiro began to feel sorry for her, and so he picked up her marketing textbook and flipped through it in search of the topic she was supposed to be writing about, while giving her back a comforting rub. He wasn’t sure where this whole ‘having a heart’ and ‘being kind’ shit was coming from, but it had spread from the way he treated Ichigo to the way he treats Rangiku; like a disease. Toshiro was very uncomfortable with it. He missed the days when he’d say ‘too damn bad’ and slam the door in her face.

“Here you go,” Toshiro said, returning her textbook ten minutes later, “I’ve put tabs on the pages you need to read, and highlighted the really important points. Read through it all, and then we can develop your thesis.”

She squealed and launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his head and pushing him deep into the ‘valley of death’ that was her chest. Toshiro struggled but it was no use. Well, he was a black belt, so of course he could get out of it if he really needed to, but he didn’t want to have to hurt Rangiku to do so.

“Am I interrupting something?”

Toshiro could just make out the muffled cheeky voice of Ichigo. The aspiring doctor had obviously finished having dinner down at the dining hall and slipped through the door during the first stages of Toshiro’s suffocation.

“Ichigo!” Rangiku exclaimed happily, releasing Toshiro to wave stupidly at him.

Toshiro stumbled back a few steps, reeling and gasping for air. He felt a strong hand grasp is upper arm and another at the base of his back to steady him. Black spots swam all over his field of vision as Toshiro waited somewhat impatiently for his breathing to return to normal.

“Rangiku!” He groaned, panting a little. “If you suffocate me…I won’t be able to help you…with your essay!”

His vision clearing, Toshiro was able to see Rangiku give a guilty smile, “Sorry, Toshiro, I won’t do it again!”

“Yes, you will,” Toshiro muttered, choosing to ignore that ridiculous nickname.

Rangiku giggled and from behind him, Toshiro could hear Ichigo’s deep chuckle. He was suddenly very aware that his idiotic roommate still had a secure hold on him. It was odd, because Toshiro hated physical contact from others, with Rangiku, Momo and Granny being the sole exceptions since they were family (well, Rangiku wasn’t, but she came pretty damn close), but he didn’t really mind Ichigo touching him like he was currently. It was kind of warm, actually, comforting even.

Ichigo must have realised what he was doing as he suddenly released him. Toshiro thanked him quietly, ducking his head a little so no one would see the light blush that had graced his cheeks. Silence crept over the room; Ichigo was scratching the back of his neck awkwardly, and Rangiku’s eyes were darting between them. Toshiro could see mischief brewing in his female companion’s eyes; a look he knew all too well.

“I’m going to have a shower,” Toshiro announced. “I expect you to have read those pages I tagged by the time I get out, Rangiku.”

She gave him a mock salute, followed by a sarcastic “Yes, Sir!” and a playful wink.

Toshiro shook his head and turned towards his bedroom.

“Toshiro!” called Ichigo. “I’m putting the kettle on; do you want a tea or something?”

Toshiro had tea twice a day, every day, sometimes more when studying. He had green tea – no sugar – in the mornings to wake him up and a cup of camomile tea – with one teaspoon of honey – every night before bed to help him wind down. Toshiro also liked coffee, but saved it for when he was extra tired, like after having done an all-nighter or in preparation to do an all-nighter, of which was looking very likely tonight.

“Coffee, please,” Toshiro answered, looking over his shoulder at his tall roomie, “Black, one sugar. I think I’m going to need it tonight.”

He heard Rangiku groan as she accepted her fate and asked Ichigo for a coffee as well.

* * *

“Toshiro.”

Toshiro’s mind was foggy; thoughtless.

“Toshiro, time to get up.”

Words began to form in his clouded brain as he became aware of a soft voice calling his name and something prodding his arm gently.

He groaned, trying to shake off the annoying nudging and get another few minutes of sleep; beautiful, warm sleep.

“Toshiro, wake up.”

Feeling the warmth slowly recede, Toshiro now only felt cool air surrounding him and a cold, hard surface on which his head rested. Blinking slowly, and wincing at the light of day that his eyes were not prepared for, Toshiro found himself hunched over the kitchen table. His reading glasses were sitting askew on his face and a pen was still poised loosely in his hand.

“Good morning, Star shine!”

Toshiro jerked up only to come face to face with a grinning Ichigo. Still quite mentally out of it, Toshiro pulled off his glasses, setting them down on the table, before rubbing his eyes and forcing his mind to catch up as he took in his surroundings.

Rangiku was asleep on the couch, her marketing textbook lay open and face down across her stomach and she was wearing one of Toshiro’s baggy hoodies. Ichigo was kneeling next to him, a steaming mug in his hand, as he looked upon him with soft, caring eyes.

“Here,” Ichigo handed the mug to Toshiro. “Drink up, get dressed and then we are going down to breakfast.”

Toshiro opened his mouth to protest, since he rarely ate breakfast, but was shushed by Ichigo.

“You two were still up at four o’clock when I went to the bathroom, which means you’ve had under three hours sleep,” He began in a lecturing tone. “Today is Thursday; your longest day, plus you have work tonight. You are going to come to the dining hall with me to get a proper breakfast and that’s final.”

Ichigo’s voice had an air of authority to it, and left no room for discussion. When Toshiro said nothing in response – mostly out of shock – Ichigo turned and marched into bathroom.

With no proper thoughts running through his head, Toshiro took a few sips of his tea – his impeccably brewed tea – to get his mind working again. He was slow in the mornings, which was why he tended to get up a little earlier in order to let his mind adjust and operate normally by the time he had to start getting ready.

He moved over to the couch to rouse Rangiku from her sleep. It was never an easy task to wake her, so he had to resort to shaking her rather violently and smacking her softly with one of the couch cushions.

He let her have a sip of his tea to get her up and going. He was usually his most generous when he was tired, probably due to the fact he couldn’t be bothered to argue.

“Did we finish it?!” Rangiku exclaimed, suddenly remembering why she was in his dorm in the first place.

“I think so,” Toshiro winced at the high pitch of her voice. “But read through it before you print anything; God knows what I let you write at four in the morning.”

After inspecting the laptop to see that they had, in fact, completed her essay, Rangiku squealed in delight and gathered her things together.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She squeezed the life out of him. “You’re the best, Toshiro, you really are!”

“I know,” Toshiro yawned, practically pushing her out the door. “Try to pay attention in class more, okay?”

Not waiting to hear her reply, Toshiro shut the door firmly. He gathered his books off the table and staggered off to his bedroom to get dressed for breakfast.

* * *

Just over a fortnight after Toshiro’s almost all-nighter with Rangiku, he found himself suddenly accosted in the quad where he’d been studying all afternoon by the devil herself and his orange-haired roommate.

“Toshiro!” Rangiku called, skipping towards him happily, Ichigo jogging beside her.

He glanced up at them and sighed. He’d come out here to study while it was quiet; he didn’t have an afternoon class today and the quad was mostly empty. The mid-May weather was also quite pleasant, and Toshiro found he was warm enough in just a thin cardigan.

“What is it now, Rangiku?”

“I got a B!” She exclaimed enthusiastically, waving piece of paper in front of his face.

“Largely thanks to you, of course,” Ichigo chimed in, leaning down to ruffle Toshiro’s hair.

Toshiro battered his hand away and fixed him the most deadly glare he could manage. Ichigo laughed nervously and took a small step back.

“What are you talking about, Ran?” Toshiro asked his big-breasted friend as he turned to give her his attention.

“I got a B!” She repeated cheerfully, passing him the piece of paper. “Low range B, but still a B! And on a subject I know nothing about!”

Toshiro inspected the paper. It was her grading sheet from the marketing essay they spent all night working on. She had gotten 71.5/100, which by their university was a B range mark. High C’s and Low B’s were Rangiku’s average marks, so when he helped her, that’s what he aimed for. Being a genius, Toshiro could have done the essay alone and got an A range mark without having been to a single marketing class, but he had to make it look genuine that Rangiku had done the work. She had done most of the actual writing, of course, he’d never write it for her, but he had gathered all the information and made specific notes about what to include in her arguments.

“Congratulations, Rangiku,” He smirked sarcastically.

“I love you, I really do,” She cooed, planting a sloppy kiss on his forehead.

He told her to fuck off but she just kissed him again. Ichigo roared with laughter, quite obviously amused by Toshiro’s distress. Rangiku and Ichigo had become pretty good friends lately – too good in Toshiro’s opinion – which often lead to them ganging up on him.

“Save it for Ichimaru,” Toshiro snapped, pushing Rangiku off him, and returning to his work. He heard her giggle from above him.

“I’ll see you at work tonight, Toshiro!” Rangiku grinned and ran off; narrowly avoiding the pen he threw at her.

They worked together at a hair salon down the street. Rangiku had done a night-time hair dressing course during her last year of high school and first year of college which allowed her a junior position at the small shop, and when she’d first met Toshiro, he was looking for causal work – mostly just for extra spending money, since he was on a full scholarship that included boarding expenses – and got him an evening job sweeping hair up at her work.

When the shop owner passed away, her daughter took over the salon, but unfortunately, while she was a brilliant hairdresser, she had no idea about how to run a business. Toshiro tried to help her learn the basics; payroll, accounts, ordering supplies, etc., and ended up taking over the entire written side of the business. It wasn’t hard since it was a rather small business and it kept him busy three nights a week, so in truth Toshiro didn’t mind it.

“She’s lucky to have you,” Ichigo quipped, walking over to pick up the pen Toshiro had thrown at his best friend.

Toshiro released an exasperated sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers.

“Yeah,” Toshiro grunted. “She’d be fucking failing otherwise.”

“Yeah, um, about that…” Ichigo asked, wringing his hands together nervously. “I, um…I was wondering…”

Toshiro eyed off the mumbling teen. Ichigo had never come across as timid but right now he was stumbling over his words and his voice sounded a little shaky.

“Spit it out, idiot. I haven’t got all day.”

“Oh okay, yes, um, I have an assignment and-”

“You need help?”

“Ahh yes, well no, I-”

“Kurosaki.”

“I understand the subject,” Ichigo stated, seeming finally able to get to the point. “But at school, I was never good a writing essays, so I was wondering if you could help me with structuring it and whatever else…um, please?”

Toshiro sighed. People really needed to go somewhere else for help; he wasn’t a teacher.

“When’s it due?” He asked apprehensively, raising a questioning eyebrow at the strawberry; if Ichigo was anything like Rangiku than tomorrow would be his answer.

“Friday, next week,” Ichigo answered firmly. Well, that made him the less useless of the two.

“Fine,” Toshiro reluctantly agreed. “Sunday afternoon, our dorm, bring food.”

Toshiro couldn’t help but blush a little as Ichigo beamed at him, thanking him over and over.

“Okay, now get lost, I’m studying.”


	4. Building Trust

Two months into the academic year and Ichigo could honestly say that he loved college. While the hype of starting university was wearing off most of the freshmen who now trudged into class with frowns on their faces, Ichigo was still as keen as he was on day one. Classes were interesting and he’d done really well on his first round of assignments. He had ended up trying out for the basketball team, and, as it turned out, he wasn’t half bad. Last night they had played their first match and won. Ichigo had also made so many friends; most through Renji and the team, but also some in his classes and from the boarding house.

As his eyes drifted to the small form curled up on the other end of the couch, Ichigo did have to admit that his favourite thing so far was his gradually improving relationship with his roommate. Just as he had thought, Toshiro had only needed some time to warm up to him. These days they were pretty good friends; well, Toshiro might have categorized them as ‘acquaintances’ but still a massive step up from their first week living together.

“Is there any reason you keep staring at me, Kurosaki?” Toshiro asked, his voice tinged with mild irritation as he glanced up from the book in his hands.

 _Oh crap_ – caught again.

“I wasn’t staring, I was just-”

A loud knock on the door rang through the dorm and successfully saved Ichigo from explaining his embarrassing actions.

“I’ll get it!” Ichigo exclaimed, wasting no time in jumping to his feet and striding over to the door.

Pulling the door open, Ichigo wasn’t surprised to find Rangiku on the other side, since she visited them more than any of Ichigo’s friends, but he _was_ surprised to find her crying. She had red, puffy eyes and tear tracks stained down her cheeks. Hiccupping quietly, she held her phone and a soggy, crumpled up tissue in one hand.

“Rangiku!” Ichigo gasped. “What’s wrong?”

Instead of answering with words, Rangiku’s face scrunched up and she covered her face with her free hand as she burst into a fresh round of sobs.

Quickly pulling her inside and shutting the door with a kick, Ichigo drew the crying woman into his arms. She pressed her face into his shoulder, body shaking, and Ichigo could feel his shirt slowly becoming soaked from her tears. What on Earth could bring the happy-go-luck woman down?

Glancing back at the couch for Toshiro’s help, Ichigo found that the prodigy was not there. Where did he go? Surely, he wouldn’t leave Ichigo to deal with his hysterical ‘best friend’.

Ichigo led the very distraught Rangiku to the couch and pulled her down beside him. Just then, Toshiro emerged from his bedroom with something tucked under his arm and headed into the kitchen without a glance in their direction. Not being able to see what the white-haired male was up to with his back to him, Ichigo’s curiosity peaked.

Ichigo rubbed soothing circles onto Rangiku’s back as the twenty-one year old continued to cry her heart out on his shoulder. A minute later, Toshiro exited the kitchen and came to kneel on the floor beside Rangiku’s legs, and placed his various items on the coffee table. Ichigo was surprised to find that he’d brought over a box of tissues, a tub of ice cream, three spoons, three cups and a bottle of sake.

“Sake?” He questioned.

Technically, they weren’t allowed to have alcohol on campus, and legally, neither Ichigo nor Toshiro were old enough to drink it since the drinking age in Japan was twenty, but this was college, so most dorms had their secret stashes.

“It’s better that she drinks here under our supervision, than alone in her dorm or on the streets,” Toshiro explained with a frown, uncapping the bottle and filling a cup, “because either way, she is going to drink… At least, I make her drink it out of a cup and not the bottle.”

Toshiro handed Rangiku the cup as she detached herself from Ichigo’s side. He then proceeded to take the lid off the ice cream and hand her a spoon. His actions looked automatic, and mildly robotic, as though this was just a casual everyday afternoon.

“You’ve done this before,” Ichigo stated, watching in shock at the ease the two best friends fell into a comfort routine.

“Too many times,” Toshiro sighed softly, reaching up to gently wipe the last of the tears off Rangiku’s face.

“It’s the only time he’s nice to me,” Rangiku hiccupped, a bitter sweet laugh to accompany her words.

Ichigo chuckled softly at her weak attempt at humour, and accepted the spoon Toshiro held out for him. Apparently the three of them were going to sit around the tub of ice cream and share it while Rangiku told them of her woes.

“Now, Rangiku, is this about something other than Ichimaru, or should I pour myself a cup too?” Toshiro asked tonelessly.

Rangiku’s face screwed up, and she whispered solemnly, “You better start pouring…”

Toshiro’s face remained expressionless as he once again lifted the bottle of sake to fill another cup. He looked up at Ichigo and pointed the bottle to him, silently asking if he’d like to join them. Stunned beyond words that Toshiro actually drank – since he came across as a real by-the-book kind of guy – Ichigo could only nod his consent.

“You drink, Toshiro?”

“Sometimes,” He replied curtly, and not expanding further as he handed Ichigo his own sake cup.

Toshiro retuned his attention to Rangiku, who was avoiding his gaze by studying her cup of sake like it was a piece of abstract art. He found her hand with his and held it, running his thumb gently over her knuckles.

Ichigo was always amazed when he watched the two of them interact. Their personalities were opposite and yet they got along so well. Rangiku was friendly with everyone, but from what he could tell, she only ever opened up truthfully to Toshiro. She was the most popular person at this school and yet she’d give up anything and everything just to hang out with the 14 year old prodigy whom everyone called “cold”. Toshiro did come across as cold, and rude too, doing his absolute best to push people away, and yet here he was, comforting Rangiku Matsumoto in a way only a best friend would know. Ichigo had never seen this side of him before; behind closed doors, Toshiro was gentle and kind and warm.

“What’d he do this time?” Toshiro ground out, sounding as though he was trying to supress a lot of anger.

Rangiku didn’t answer straight away; she put down her near-empty sake cup and picked up the ice cream tub before placing it on her lap and stabbing her spoon into it rather aggressively.

“He cheated on me,” She eventually answered.

She took a deep breath before taking a spoonful of ice cream into her mouth. They were obviously talking about her boyfriend – the recently graduated Gin Ichimaru. Ichigo wasn’t sure how it was possible for someone to cheat on a girl like her; she ticked all the boxes when it came to being the perfect girl – she was beautiful, funny, compassionate and wholehearted.

Toshiro’s face was strained but he kept quiet, willing her to continue. She handed him her phone.

“He told me this morning – read the texts.” Rangiku told them, new tears building in her eyes.

Ichigo plucked a new tissue from the box and gave it to her. She thanked him quietly, dabbing at her leaking eyes, and shakily taking another spoonful of ice cream. Rangiku offered him the tub and Ichigo took it from her grasp. _Misery loves company_ , Ichigo thought with a shrug as he dug his own spoon in.

Toshiro was silently scrolling through her texts, pausing every so often to take a sip from his sake, open his mouth as though he was about to say something and then take another sip of his sake. Ichigo theorised that by drinking, Toshiro was supressing the urge to say what was on his mind, which was probably something about how much he hated Gin Ichimaru. Ichigo didn’t have to be a mastermind to work out there was some animosity between the two of them; possibly because they were both so close to Rangiku, and/or because they were often compared due to their same status as geniuses.

“He hasn’t even apologized,” Toshiro said at last, his voice low and dripping with venom. “He just told you, and then tried to justify it by saying he did it because he hardly sees you anymore and needed a – quote – “physical release”.”

According to Izuru, Gin was offered a job straight after graduating and had to move to the main city, which was an hour’s car or train trip away. Since Rangiku lived on campus, she usually only got to see him on the weekends they were both free.

“That’s fucking pathetic!”

It was Ichigo who had spoken this time. He was outraged. He might not have known the full story or ever met Gin, but he didn’t need to. Cheating was wrong, period. He had only started hanging out with Rangiku this last month, but she was still his friend and he felt protective over her like he did his closest friends and family.

“I know, Ichigo, but you don’t understand,” Rangiku looked at him with a grim smile. “We’ve been friends since we were kids. I love him.”

“And yet, he treats you like this!” Ichigo argued, trying to keep his voice calm for her sake. “When you’re in love with someone, cheating just shouldn’t happen. That one person should be the only person on your mind, and you should be fucking happy about it, not going around banging other women.”

Okay, Ichigo was rather passionate about hating infidelity. It’d never happened to him, but he considered it to be a deal-breaker; he’d never stay with someone if they betrayed him like that, no matter how much he loved them. Loyalty was at the very top of his list of qualities that any future boyfriend of his must have.

“So you want me to break up with him then?” Rangiku asked trying to sound aggressive but it was coming out more sad and afraid, her voice cracking towards the end.

“I would if someone did that to me,” Ichigo responded truthfully and as gently as he could muster.

Rangiku nodded, hiccupped and turned her attention back to Toshiro, who had now moved up to sit on the couch at her other side.

“And you?” She asked him. “You’ve never liked Gin.”

“It’s not about whether I like him or not,” Toshiro answered in a clipped tone. “It’s about whether he still makes you happy.”

“He does make me happy.”

“Does he?” Toshiro pushed. “I’m sure he did at first, but since we’ve been back at school, you’re fighting with him over text at least twice a week, and you come to me crying at least once a fortnight.”

Ichigo hadn’t realised the situation was that bad, and almost had to shove a fist in his mouth to keep from commenting on it. He would have to leave this one to Toshiro; he knew Rangiku better.

“All this crying, Ran, it isn’t you. You’re happy and fun and playful. I hate that he is hurting you all the time,” Toshiro continued. “What if it was me in your position? What would you want me to do?”

Ichigo watched as Rangiku’s face screwed up in horror and knew that Toshiro had played his trump card. It was widely known that Rangiku was fiercely protective over the young genius; she’d kill anyone for merely thinking of hurting Toshiro. Slowly, realisation dawned on Rangiku as her expression morphed into resigned understanding; she would have told Toshiro to break up with any girl – _or guy,_ Ichigo added thoughtfully – who had done what Gin had done to her.

Rangiku’s rapidly deteriorating strength collapsed as she burst into heavy sobs and threw herself onto Toshiro. The seventeen year old wrapped his arms around her shoulders and held her while she cried. She’d accepted what she had to do, and was grieving over her loss.

* * *

“Why are you close with Rangiku, but so distant from everyone else?” Ichigo asked his roommate out of the blue later that night.

Toshiro only shrugged in reply as he walked around the coffee table, picking up tear-soaked tissues and chucking them in the empty ice cream tub before it went in the trash. It was late now, coming up on eleven, and Toshiro had already had his night time tea.

It had been several hours since Rangiku had first arrived at their door. She’d been with them for the rest of the afternoon; crying, drinking, complaining that she was going to get fat from all the ice cream but eventually they coaxed her back to her normal smiley self. She had made the decision to break up with Gin when she visits him next weekend. Once she had calmed down, she seemed to accept it and be okay with it; it was sad but needed to be done. Rangiku had only just left, returning home to the dorm that she shared with her friend Nanao Ise.

“I think you’d have a lot of friends if you didn’t push people away so often…” Ichigo continued since he’d got no answer.

“What makes you think that I’d want friends?” Toshiro muttered, resting the now empty bottle of sake in the tissue-filled tub before turning towards the kitchen.

“Everyone wants friends.”

“Not me.”

“Why not?” Ichigo pursued.

“Why so many questions?” Toshiro snapped, turning to glare at him.

It was Ichigo’s turn to shrug.

Obviously the ice wall that surrounded him and kept people away had resurrected now that Rangiku had left for the day. Ichigo didn’t understand how he could go from being so sincere, caring and affectionate to stony, aloof and tense all in one evening. Where was the Toshiro that hugged Rangiku for an hour while she sobbed on him?

“You’re a mystery, Toshiro,” Ichigo responded. “One that I’d like to understand better.”

The Toshiro he had seen today was beautiful, and he wanted to see more of it. He wanted Toshiro to be like that with him. He had to laugh a little; he was actually feeling a little jealous of Rangiku and how close their relationship was.

“Don’t waste your time, Kurosaki,” Toshiro advised coolly. “I’m hardly worth it.”

“What?” Ichigo questioned disbelievingly, replaying Toshiro’s last line in his head to ensure he had actually heard it.

Toshiro didn’t answer. He put the tub of tissues and sake bottle in the trash can and turned towards his bedroom. Ichigo decided not to let him run away from this and swiftly stood up, striding over to meet the boy in front of his door. Ichigo slid between Toshiro and his bedroom door just as the boy was about to reach for the doorknob. The dorm room became suddenly very still and eerily quiet. Toshiro looked at his hand outstretched hand, shocked to have had his path block before he turned his furious gaze upon Ichigo.

“Kurosaki,” He growled.

“We’re going to talk about this, Toshiro,” Ichigo commanded. “Why don’t you think you’re worth it?”

“It’s ‘Hitsugaya’, Idiot,” Toshiro spat. “Now move or I’ll fucking move you myself.”

“Why don’t you think you’re worth it?” Ichigo repeated, this time louder and clearer, and ignored Toshiro’s threat. He had no doubt that the boy could easy move him; he wasn’t a black belt for nothing.

“We’re not friends, Kurosaki,” Toshiro hissed.

“Yes, we are, Toshiro!” Ichigo exclaimed. “We live together. You lend me your pens and help me with my assignments. Today, you let me stay with you and Rangiku, and drink with you of all things!”

“That doesn’t make us friends.”

Toshiro was mad. His voice was dangerously low and his eyes spelt murder. Ichigo was actually beginning to get nervous; perhaps this had not been the right approach…but he was here now, so he might as well follow through and pray that he makes some ground with the frosty boy genius.

“It does to me,” Ichigo whispered, placing a hand on the boy’s thin shoulder.

Toshiro flinched at the contact but otherwise said nothing. He simply glared up angrily at the obstacle his way. They stood in absolute silence. Ichigo held the eye contact, staring hard into those intense cerulean orbs and challenging Toshiro to say something else…but the boy remained quiet. It seemed like many minutes had passed when Toshiro eventually broke their staring contest and looked uncomfortably at his feet. Ichigo knew he was winning; he could see the mental torment in Toshiro’s eyes before he looked away. The prodigy was torn between opening up to Ichigo and staying securely behind his ice wall. Ichigo had the feeling he had dipped into something a little more complex than just a kid who doesn’t play well with others, and that Toshiro was trying to keep himself closed off for other reasons.

“People leave,” Toshiro eventually answered in a quiet tone, shrugging as if it was the simplest answer in the world.

Stunned and with no idea how to respond, Ichigo let Toshiro push him aside and enter his bedroom. Slowly, he turned around to face Toshiro, and to his surprise, the prodigy had not slammed the door behind him but had left it wide open. Toshiro’s back was to him; his stance rigid like a statue in the centre of the dark room. Ichigo took a step under the threshold; he had a feeling Toshiro wasn’t finished.

“Rangiku went to Australia in March before school started back up… She gave me the boomerang,” Toshiro continued softly as Ichigo spared a glance at the aforementioned item sitting innocently on the desk. “She said it means that no matter how many times I try to throw her away, she’ll keep coming back.”

Ichigo remained silent, willing Toshiro to continue as he stared at the genius’ back.

“She’s the one exception. Well, her and my grandmother… but she’s old now; she’ll leave soon too. Everyone leaves.”

“I’m not going to leave,” Ichigo stated firmly, finally piecing together what Toshiro was trying to say to him.

He didn’t have to have his masters in psychology to know that the prodigy was dealing with some heavy abandonment issues. The boy had named his grandmother and best friend as the only two who wouldn’t desert him; what about his parents? Or his cousin, Momo? Ichigo was sure there was a story behind it all, and maybe he could ask Rangiku about it later if Toshiro doesn’t volunteer the information himself – and Ichigo highly doubted he would.

“You don’t know that,” Toshiro laughed bitterly, turning to face Ichigo. “You don’t know me.”

“I know how you like your tea,” Ichigo offered with a half-smile, “and at what time of the day you want it. I know that you’re ambidextrous, although you prefer to write with your left hand. I know that you like mint or anything that contains mint…”

“How do you know all that?” Toshiro asked, his voice barely louder than a whisper, shock written across his face.

Ichigo shrugged before taking a few quick steps to place him directly in front of Toshiro. Those beautiful teal eyes were shimmering in dark, filled with astonishment. Toshiro’s lips were sightly parted and Ichigo had to supress the strong urge in the back of his mind to not lean down to find out if they were as soft and kissable as they looked.

“You’re interesting, and I’m observant,” Ichigo answered at last. “I’m not leaving, Toshiro. I’m staying here and I’m getting to know you better.”

“Why?” Toshiro asked, his voice sounding closer to his actual age than it normally did.

“Because there is something about you,” Ichigo whispered, cupping the boy’s cheek with one hand and silently marvelling at how soft it felt, “something…something special.”

Ichigo leant down and pressed a soft kiss to Toshiro’s other cheek. He wasn’t sure what he was doing, but the black belt hadn’t punched him in the throat yet so he figured he hadn’t stepped too far over the line; it just felt like the natural thing to do. Withdrawing quickly, Ichigo’s heart was pounding in his chest but he willed his face to remain calm and controlled.

“I’m not going anywhere, so you better get used to me,” Ichigo stated, taking a step back and offering Toshiro a cheeky smile.

Toshiro blinked owlishly at him, holding his hand to the spot Ichigo had just kissed, as if his mind was yet to catch up with this turn of events. Ichigo held back a smirk at the supposed genius’ slow moment, and retreated back to the door frame.

“Good night, Toshiro.”

“Good night,” Toshiro replied so softly, Ichigo almost missed it, “…Ichigo.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone reading my Afterfamily chapter and expecting an upload today, I'm sorry but it's going to be delayed by a couple weeks. I'm moving and have had a lot going on with work so I just haven't been able to get my next chapter written. Sorry and thanks for understanding!


	5. Tell Me A Story, A Happy One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo gets sick, and Toshiro feels the need to look after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update, I moved flats over the weekend~

Toshiro arrived back to the dorm after karate to find his tall, orange-haired roommate sprawled across the couch in a deep sleep. He was snoring a little louder than he normally would and drooling on the edge of his pillow. Toshiro smirked at the image.

Quietly going about his evening routine, Toshiro showered, changed into his sweatpants and brought his books out to the kitchen table to study and work on the assignment that was due next week. He preferred to study in the main room as opposed to the bedroom because the lighting was nicer on his eyes. He popped his reading glasses on and took a seat at the table. It wasn’t that his eye sight was actually that terrible; he wore his glasses mainly to help him concentrate.

With a quick glance to his right, Toshiro was also willing to admit privately that Ichigo’s snoring was a nice background noise; it was rhythmic and consistent and helped to keep Toshiro on task. Oddly enough, it also helped him get to sleep at night since he could often hear it through the thin wall that separated their bedrooms. It was, overall, a comforting noise…like the pitter patter of rain.

It _was_ a comforting noise.

Ichigo’s snoring was replaced by loud, harsh coughs. The orange-haired teenager sprung into a sitting position, one hand covering his mouth and the other gripping the back of the couch. Toshiro cringed at the sound as it turned wet. He watched as Ichigo’s coughs subsided and he pulled his hand back to observe it with a strangled “yuck.”

Toshiro quickly grabbed the tissue box off the table and moved to Ichigo’s side. Ichigo jumped a little when Toshiro appeared next to him silently, and the prodigy had to stifle a gasp at the strawberry’s appearance. Ichigo’s noise was red but the rest of his face a ghostly pale. There were dark rings under his eyes and his lips were dry and chapped. Short orange spikes had stuck to his forehead as sweat emanated from his pores.

Toshiro wordlessly handed Ichigo a tissue to wipe his hand with and then another to blow his dripping nose.

“You’re sick,” Toshiro stated matter-of-factly.

“No ‘m not,” The strawberry argued, his voice tired and hoarse. “Just dust allergies.”

“Allergies make you sneeze and get watery eyes, they don’t make you cough up phlegm and sweat out of your forehead.” Toshiro informed him. “As a future doctor, you should learn to recognise the symptoms of a common cold.”

“I know the symptoms,” Ichigo mumbled miserably before ripping a new tissue out of the box in Toshiro’s hands and sneezing violently into it.

“I think I’m just going to leave this with you…” Toshiro grimaced, placing the box gently in his roommate’s lap.

Toshiro heard Ichigo murmur something about having a shower, before shakily rising to his feet and trudging into his room. The teen emerged a few seconds later with a towel and shuffled towards the bathroom. The white-haired prodigy sighed before returning to his study.

It had been two nights since their ‘deep and meaningful’ talk, as Rangiku would call it, and Toshiro was still confused about how he felt about the whole thing. Part of him had been glad to get that information off his chest, but the other part of him was scared shitless to have let Ichigo in even that far. His roommate’s eyes had been so full of empathy and care… It made Toshiro anxious.

He had told Ichigo the truth about why he doesn’t like making friends – because they all end up leaving him – but even then, that’d just been the tip of the iceberg and the vaguest possible explanation he could give. Toshiro dealt with having Rangiku around – mostly because he knew that if she was going to leave, she would have already done it, but she was way too persistent about staying by him. In the first few months of her trying to befriend him, he’d thrown every possible grenade in his arsenal to destroy that relationship before it could form; he’d be rude, he’d been arrogant, he threatened her, and one time he even tried to hit on her, but she had just laughed and told him to stop being ‘silly’ and take her shopping.

With Ichigo, Toshiro wanted to fight it so badly, but something kept stopping him. It was a big part of the reason he’d told Ichigo anything the other night; he could have just as easily drop-kicked the fucker into next week… but he didn’t, and he didn’t want to, and he hated that he didn’t want to. Toshiro had spent many years building up his defences and projecting a cold, stern exterior. Rangiku had dug under it to make her way inside, but Ichigo was destroying it from the outside, hell bent on getting in. If the orange-haired idiot kept this up, Toshiro didn’t think he was going to hold out much longer.

And then there was that kiss on the cheek. What the fuck was that?! Toshiro’s cheek had tingled for a good half hour after that. It had felt good in a way that Toshiro didn’t understand. His granny kissed him on the cheek all the time, and Rangiku tried it when she was feeling brave, but never had it felt like it had when Ichigo did it. Toshiro was not as innocent as many people thought; he had kissed a couple boys before, and he’d kissed a girl too before he’d known any better and come to the conclusion that he was, in fact, gay. Even then, the drunken hook ups with those two guys had felt nothing like Toshiro had felt from a mere kiss on the cheek from that damn strawberry.

The sound of retching broke Toshiro out of his thoughts. His eyes immediately went to the bathroom door. Ichigo sounded like he was vomiting. Scratch that – he sounded like he was dry heaving and nothing was coming out. Waiting for it to finish, Toshiro headed over to the door and knocked gently.

“Kurosaki?”

He heard a muffled “come in” and slowly opened the door. Ichigo had obviously just come out of the shower, droplets of water running down his well-toned stomach to the towel that hung a little too loosely around his waist. The nineteen year old was leaning heavily over the sink and washing his mouth out. Keeping his eyes away the deep V of Ichigo’s abdomen – which was not at all like a giant arrow to his dick – Toshiro sighed and leaned back against the door frame.

“I think you should go to bed now, Kurosaki,” He muttered. “You’re obviously quite ill.”

“Worried about me, Toshiro?” Ichigo tried to grin but it appeared to be more of a pained half-smile than anything else.

“Of course not,” Toshiro smirked, “but the sounds of your sickness are disrupting my study, so…”

Ichigo’s began to laugh at Toshiro’s response but was harshly interrupted by another severe coughing fit. Toshiro frowned; in truth, he was a little worried – he didn’t like to see Ichigo suffering. Taking two steps forward, Toshiro bent down to open the little cabinet door underneath the basin and pulled out a small tub.

“Chest rub,” He announced, handing it to the now recovering first year student. “Put this on and then go to bed.”

“You’re not going to apply it for me?” Ichigo asked, winking. Toshiro raised an eyebrow in his direction.

“In your dreams, Kurosaki,” He growled, hoping the heat he felt in his cheeks wasn’t visible. “Now go.”

“Dun’ wanna,” Ichigo whined. “I’m hungry and it’s dinner time.”

Ichigo went to take a step past Toshiro towards the door, but as soon as his arms were no longer holding him up over the sink and his whole weight transferred to his legs, he crumpled to the ground. Karate reflexes kicking in, Toshiro was able to dive down quick enough to catch him before he hit the hard tiles. The child prodigy took a deep breath, willing himself not to drop the nineteen year old who was at least a foot taller than him and probably close to double his own weight, and slung Ichigo’s limp arm over his shoulders. Forcing his knees to straighten, Toshiro managed to pull Ichigo up so that he was standing somewhat shakily on his two feet.

Ichigo groaned, and brought his hand up to cover his eyes. To him, the world was probably spinning around too fast.

“Kurosaki, you are very sick,” Toshiro huffed as Ichigo lent against him. “You’re going to bed and that’s final. I’ll bring you something to eat.”

Ichigo only nodded.

* * *

“I didn’t know you could cook,” Ichigo stated when Toshiro re-entered his bedroom with a bowl of soup and a slice of toast on a tray, as well as a steaming cup of tea.

“My grandmother taught me,” Toshiro informed him, gently setting the tray on Ichigo’s lap, “but this soup came from a can, so it’s not really cooking.”

Ichigo smiled gratefully at him and dipped his toast into the soup before taking a rather large bite. Glad that his roommate had not lost his appetite despite his rather severe cold, Toshiro turned to leave, but felt a strong hand grip his wrist.

“Stay, Toshiro,” Ichigo looked up at him with imploring eyes that no mere mortal could refuse. “Please.”

Toshiro hated that look so much. How was it even possible for a happy-go-lucky idiot such as Ichigo to have such an effect on the cold-hearted aloof child prodigy that was himself? It was fucking ridiculous, if he did say so himself. To be fair, it wasn’t just the look, but also the pleading voice and desperate grip around his wrist.

“Fine,” Toshiro grumbled, pulling the desk chair over to the bed and taking a seat. “Are you feeling any better?”

Ichigo nodded enthusiastically, “Yeah, much better since I’ve been sitting here. The heat of the shower probably didn’t help…”

Toshiro looked at him sceptically. Ichigo still looked quite sick. Sure, the dizziness had probably gone and any headache he might have had most likely soothed now that he wasn’t under the bright lights, but his nose was still red and dripping, his voice still hoarse and Toshiro had heard him coughing only seconds before he had brought in the soup.

“You should rest,” Toshiro advised. “I don’t think you’ll be making it to class tomorrow… or to basketball training.”

Ichigo groaned, “But I’ve got a prac lesson in the morning…”

“And how are you going to get there if you can’t even walk properly, Idiot?” Toshiro questioned him. “The Kuchki girl is stronger than she looks, I’m sure, but I don’t think she’s that strong.”

Ichigo pouted. Toshiro glared.

Sighing in resignation, Ichigo lifted the tea to his lips and took a sip. Immediately he pulled it back to study it in interest.

“What tea is this?” He asked, coughing a little.

“Elderflower,” Toshiro answered. “It’s good for common colds, sinus infections and the like. It also has antibacterial and antiviral properties that can help build your immune system.”

Ichigo grinned, “Maybe you should be the doctor.”

“I wouldn’t be a very good one given that I hate hospitals,” Toshiro frowned at the suggestion and shuddered at the idea of being inside one of those death-houses, “but I do find traditional healing and alternative medicines to be an interesting subject.”

Ichigo frowned and appeared to think things over as he devoured his soup. Toshiro took advantage of the silence and glanced around the bedroom. He’d never been in Ichigo’s room before, but he wasn’t surprised by the set up; posters, family photos, a set of light weights in the corner… It all screamed Ichigo. Toshiro investigated the photographs on the wall opposite him. He couldn’t see them very well from his distance and the darkness of the room, but they all appeared to be happy family photos.

He doubted Ichigo knew, but Toshiro actually played soccer with his younger sister, Karin, and from that he knew the rest of his family pretty well. Ichigo’s other sister, Yuzu, and their father, Isshin came to every soccer match, but he’d never seen Ichigo there. He prayed he never would too; Ichigo would have a fucking fit if he knew that his roommate was better friends with his sisters than him. Well ‘better’ was not the right word; he hung out socially with the girls but he felt closer to Ichigo. Either way, he was going to keep that bit of information private; the last thing he needed was Ichigo asking his sisters about him. Furthermore, Karin Kurosaki also didn’t want her brother to know that they were teammates, but she had her own reasons.

“Hey, Toshiro,” Ichigo called, pulling Toshiro from his thoughts. “You see this picture here?”

Toshiro nodded; it was a picture of a smiling woman with long orange hair and a small Ichigo cradled in her arms. It was obviously Ichigo’s mother. Toshiro knew from Karin that she’d died many years ago.

“She’s my mother,” Ichigo explained, oblivious to Toshiro’s prior knowledge. “She died ten years ago today.”

Toshiro could have sworn he heard Ichigo’s voice break at the end of that sentence. He hadn’t known that today was the anniversary. Perhaps that’s why Ichigo was sick? Toshiro rarely got sick himself, but when he did it was usually because he was stressed more than anything else.

“I had run out onto the road to catch my ball…” Ichigo continued, voice strained. “She pushed me out of the way of an oncoming bus. She died saving my life.”

“I’m sorry,” Toshiro whispered; his heart had grown heavy and he could feel the guilt radiating off Ichigo. He saw no use in telling his orange-haired companion that incident wasn’t his fault; he’d probably heard it a million times. There were no words that could ever alter the way he felt.

Ichigo continued to look at the photo, but even with his head turned away, Toshiro could see tears forming in those big brown eyes. Toshiro had never expected to see Ichigo cry – he came across as the strong, tough, non-crying type – but then again, losing a parent at a young age is a pain like no other, _or so he had heard_.

“Tell me a story, Toshiro,” Ichigo requested softly, still not looking anywhere but the photograph. “Any story, but make it a happy one.”

Toshiro, not being able to deny a suffering friend, quickly racked his memory for a good story. It upset him greatly that he had to seriously dive into his memory to find a happy story to tell Ichigo. He also wanted one that wouldn’t prompt further questions, since Ichigo was way too eager to learn everything there was to know about him. There were many aspects of his life that Toshiro was uncomfortable talking about, even with Rangiku, and thus he would not be telling them to Ichigo tonight.

A few minutes later, Toshiro settled on a happy past memory to share. It wasn’t too personal, and was rather simple.

“There is a pond at my grandmother’s house,” Toshiro began as Ichigo turned to look at him. “It’s pretty wide actually, but shallow and nothing lives in it. During the colder winters, it freezes over.”

Ichigo nodded, urging Toshiro to continue, and taking another sip of his tea.

“When I was younger, my cousin Momo would stay with us during the winter break. Have you met Momo? She studies here too, but she doesn’t board.”

“No, I haven’t met her yet, but Izuru doesn’t stop talking about her,” Ichigo answered, grinning a little. “I kind of feel like I know her.”

“Right,” Toshiro frowned. “Well anyway, she’d stay during winter and when the pond finally froze over, we would skate on it. We got pretty good at it too; learnt some jumps and everything.”

He ignored Ichigo’s ‘fucking prodigy’ comment and continued.

“We used to play one on one ice hockey,” Toshiro smiled fondly at the memory, “except with an old golf ball and sticks from the backyard.”

Ichigo laughed, and Toshiro smiled. He didn’t know why but he liked making Ichigo laugh. It was one of those deep, hearty laughs, and it was rather sexy, although Toshiro wasn’t about to admit that out loud. More than that, Toshiro was just glad to have put a smile on his face on the saddest day of the year of him. He wasn’t used to trying to make anyone other than his grandmother happy, but it felt kind of good.

“Thanks, Toshiro,” Ichigo grabbed his hand and squeezed it. “Thanks for telling me that.”

Toshiro blushed madly at the affectionate gesture and ducked his head. _What the fuck was happening to him?_

“Quick question-” Ichigo added, and Toshiro’s whole body tensed; he prayed Ichigo wouldn’t ask him anything too personal. “Do you live with your grandmother?”

Toshiro paused, quickly mulling over his answer. He had been expecting the strawberry to ask about his relationship with Momo, so that query had surprised him a little. On one hand, he was glad not to have to answer any Momo questions, but on the other, his answer to the current question might lead to further inquiries that Toshiro definitely did not want to answer. Ichigo must have noticed his hesitation because the older male had just squeezed his hand again; probably in attempt to promote his trustworthiness. He was certainly the touchy-feely type; another similarity he held with Rangiku.

“I live with her,” Toshiro answered cautiously. “Always have. She raised me.”

Toshiro held his breath as he waited for Ichigo’s next response. The strawberry only nodded, not prying further and Toshiro thanked his lucky stars. He didn’t want to lie to his roommate and kinda-sorta-friend, but he probably would have if the guy had prodded him for an explanation; he just wasn’t ready to delve that deep with him.

“You better go to sleep now, Kurosaki,” He said as he disentangled himself from Ichigo’s firm grasp, and walked straight out of the room without a second glance.

* * *

Toshiro was beginning to doze off when he felt a blanket being thrown over him and someone sitting down at the other end of the couch. Toshiro raised his head sluggishly and blinked until the blurry image of Ichigo came into focus.

“You’re feeling better, then?” Toshiro mumbled, pulling himself into a sitting position and playing idly with the tassels on the blanket’s edge.

It’d been just over twenty-eight hours since Toshiro had come home the previous night to find Ichigo snoring on the couch. He’d been up most of the night, finding that he couldn’t sleep, and that was after his little wander down to the pharmacy. During lunch break and after his final class for the day, Toshiro had returned to the dorm to check on Ichigo and found the strawberry asleep both times. He’d only just returned home from work about a half hour ago, to find, once again, the orange-haired idiot sleeping soundly.

“Yeah,” Ichigo answered, reaching across Toshiro for the TV remote. “Thanks for looking after me.”

Toshiro scoffed. He did not look after that idiot; he simply helped him to bed and got him some soup. That was it.

Ichigo seemed to read his mind without even looking at him and grinned, “You do care about me!”

“Hardly,” Toshiro muttered, doing his best to keep his voice low and dangerous.

“No?” Ichigo questioned, still grinning like the fool he was. “So you didn’t go down to the chemist to buy me medicine late last night?”

Toshiro shrugged nonchalantly, “There was an hour until curfew, it was open late, we were running low on toothpaste… really, there were a lot of factors at play – I didn’t go down just for you.”

“Uh huh,” Ichigo nudged Toshiro’s side. “What about all the new cold and flu supplies in the bathroom? We’ve got pills, capsules and liquid medicines, more chest rub, a thermometer, about three boxes of tissues…”

“Between you and Rangiku, we need those tissues,” Toshiro defended. “And I wasn’t sure if you were going to be a baby who couldn’t swallow a pill, so I got the liquid crap as well. Also, you seem like the type to get sick a lot so I’m stocking up for the future.”

Ichigo laughed outrageously at his excuses. They were excuses; Toshiro had gone down specifically to get Ichigo some medicine, and store up in case it happens again. He also knew he wasn’t going to be able to sleep or concentrate on his study until he took a walk to clear his head properly.

“You’ll get sick before I do again; especially at the rate you’re pushing yourself at,” Ichigo smirked. “I’ll be sure to return the favour when it happens.”

Toshiro scoffed again, “I don’t get sick, Kurosaki, I haven’t been sick since I was about ten.”

“When was that? Like last year?”

“It’s like you think I won’t punch you…”

“I’m still waiting for it…”

“Oh just keep talking, it’s coming.”

Ichigo prodded him in the side once again, and Toshiro punched him hard in the arm.

“Ow,” Ichigo whined. “Dead arm, dead arm!!!”

Toshiro smirked but said nothing; he had warned him.

Ichigo sat clutching his arm and muttering obscenities under his breath, but Toshiro could tell he wasn’t really upset. Toshiro curled his feet under him and laid back down, his head resting on the arm of the couch and watching absently as Ichigo used his ‘good arm’ to flip through the various television channels. He could feel the lack of sleep from the previous night weighing down on him, and slowly the world around him began to fade to black.

The last thing he was aware of was Ichigo placing a hand on his knee and whispering, “Thank you, Toshiro, for everything.”


	6. College Party

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo attends a college party and is surprised to see a number of familiar faces.

Ichigo took a sip of his beer and looked around the spacious backyard that was brimming with a carefree and upbeat atmosphere. Renji had found out that his parents were going to be out of town for the weekend and decided to throw a massive party at their house, which luckily, was located just outside Karakura Town and only a half hour drive or train ride from the university campus. Ichigo had chosen to drive, which meant that he would have to severely limit his drinks, but he didn’t mind. Renji had supplied most of the alcohol, of course, and now the party was in full swing.

He was fairly surprised by the large turnout; the whole basketball team, more than half of the male boarders and quite a few of the girls too, plus many more familiar faces from around campus. He chuckled quietly as he watched Renji make a fool of himself in front of Rukia; Ichigo was fairly certain that Renji had only thrown this party to impress the girl he dubbed ‘even more beautiful than Rangiku’.

Rangiku herself was drinking up a storm in the far corner of the backyard. She appeared to be challenging Ikkaku Madarame to a chugging competition and was winning it with no contest while Yumichika stood at a distance with a horrified expression.

“Yumichika calls drunken fools ‘unbeautiful’,” Izuru laughed beside him, having followed Ichigo’s line of sight, “and yet, he’s dating one.”

 _Typical Yumichika and Ikkaku,_ Ichigo laughed, glancing briefly over at Izuru. His girlfriend, Momo, was hugging his waist and leaning against his chest, while Izuru wrapped one arm around her shoulders and used his other hand to drink. They were a cute couple, and Momo – also Toshiro’s cousin – was a really sweet girl too. She was a day student at KTU, nineteen and in her second year of her teaching degree. They hadn’t got to talking about Toshiro yet, mostly because Ichigo didn’t want to bring it up around the guys, who of course would carry on about how Ichigo was ‘in love’ with his white-haired roommate.

Ichigo was _not_ in love with Toshiro.

Did he maybe have an itsy bitsy crush on the little genius? Perhaps…

Okay, so he had a major crush on the boy. How could he not? Toshiro was incredible. He was physical perfection in Ichigo’s eyes, but more importantly, he was intelligent and strong, and as Ichigo had learnt, Toshiro was also extremely caring and gentle. He was, in every way, the full package. Ichigo wasn’t sure when his mild interest in the seventeen year old physics student had turned into full-blown liking, and perhaps there wasn’t one individual catalyst, but that each new experience they had together had slowly developed his feelings. It had been close to three months now, since their first night as roommates.

“Ichigo?”

Ichigo whipped around at the sound of the familiar voice, and then proceeded to rub his eyes to check if he was actually seeing what he thought he was seeing.

“Yuzu? Karin?” Ichigo gaped at his two younger sisters as they stood in front of him, mirroring his surprised expression. “What are you two doing here?”

“This is my boyfriend’s house,” Yuzu answered nervously. “What are you doing here?”

“Boyfriend?!” Ichigo exclaimed. “You didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend! Who is he?”

Ichigo was shocked – to say the least – that his little, baby sister, Yuzu, had a boyfriend; kind, innocent, little Yuzu. He expected as much from Karin, who’d taken up the wild child role in the family, but not his sweet, little Yuzu. He was saying ‘little’ a lot, wasn’t he? Well, she was pretty small.

“Oh, um, sorry, Ichigo,” Yuzu shuffled awkwardly on her feet. “I wanted to tell you in person, but…you haven’t been home in a while…”

“Who?” Ichigo questioned again, ignoring Karin as she rolled her eyes and took a sip from a big red cup that he was about ninety-four percent sure would contain alcohol, but one problem at a time.

“Jinta Abarai,” Yuzu answered immediately. “He’s-”

“He’s my brother,” Renji interjected, walking up to them and dragging along a miniature version of himself by the ear that Ichigo could only assume to be Yuzu’s supposed boyfriend.

Jinta Abarai looked roughly seventeen, with the same red hair as his older brother. Unlike Renji, he kept it short and choppy. He was wearing a soccer jersey and baggy three-quarter length pants with red converse shoes. He was glaring furiously up at his older brother, and overall, looked like a cranky young teen.

“He was allowed to stay home alone while our parents were away,” Renji explained, tugging harder on the boy’s ear and ignoring the curses his brother was spitting, “and thought he’d throw his own party…”

“And then this dickhead turned up with you lot,” Jinta added, gesturing to his brother and finally pulling free of Renji’s hold on him.

“Don’t worry about him with your sister, Ichigo,” Renji grinned. “He looks tough but on the inside, he’s a frigid little bitch.”

Jinta lunged at his brother, before Karin quickly snagged the scruff of his collar and yanked him backwards until he was sitting flat on his ass. Renji was crying with laughter while Yuzu immediately dropped to his side and began fussing.

“What’d I say about picking your fights, Jinta?” Karin smirked. “Your brother is twice your size.”

Jinta grumbled and stomped off, pulling Yuzu along with him. Renji had now stumbled off too, probably looking for ‘The Kuchki Princess’. Ichigo was about to go after his little sister and her aggressive boyfriend before Karin grabbed a hold of his wrist.

“She’s fine and he’s so whipped on her, it’s disgusting,” Karin made a revolted face. “Honestly, big brother, do you think I’d let my twin go off with someone I didn’t trust?”

Ichigo sighed. Karin was very protective of Yuzu; there was absolutely no way she’d let someone close to her without being categorically sure that they would not hurt her sister in any way. He agreed to take her word for it for the time being, but he would be looking into it later.

“Fine then,” Ichigo grumbled before turning on her. “Problem number two: Is that alcohol, Karin?”

“Nope,” Karin answered a little too quickly with a sly grin on her face

Okay, it was definitely alcohol.

“Give it here. You’re not twenty yet.” Ichigo ordered, holding out his palm for her to hand it over.

“Neither are you,” Karin smirked, gesturing to the beer in his hands.

Ichigo took a step towards his rebellious younger sister. She instantly took a step back, the wide grin never leaving her face. They’d done this a few times; Karin had started drinking about a year ago, and Ichigo had found out when he had picked her up from a party. She had stumbled towards him, calling him ‘Ni-go’ because apparently she could see two of him, and then later threw up in the car.

“Karin-” Ichigo warned, taking another step forward.

Karin chuckled and with a sharp twist on her heel, she disappeared into the crowd of much taller college students. Ichigo let out a frustrated groan and held his head in his free hand. His two baby sister’s – well, they were seventeen now but still babies to him – at a college party; one with a boy and one with a drink. This was really not what Ichigo wanted to be dealing with tonight.

“Um, Ichigo?” It was Yuzu again. “Are you okay?”

“Tell me you’re not drinking too?” Ichigo asked, dragging his hand down his face.

“Of course not,” Yuzu smiled and wrapped her arms around his waist, “and don’t worry about Karin, she’s got soccer tomorrow morning so she won’t drink too much.”

Sighing for what felt like the thousandth time in ten minutes, Ichigo hugged her back. He could always count on Yuzu to be the responsible one out of all of them. She’d taken over the motherly role since theirs had passed away. She cooked, she cleaned and she looked after everyone in the family. Like Karin was protective over her, Yuzu was protective over the whole family and anybody she deemed a friend.

“And Jinta is only having one drink, because he has soccer too,” Yuzu continued despite Ichigo’s tightening grip. “He’s a good guy, Ichigo.”

“I believe you,” Ichigo mumbled, defeated,.“Just take care of your sister, okay?”

“I will,” Yuzu promised, pulling out of the hug and looking at something behind him with concerned eyes, “and I’ll take care of _him_ too.”

Confused, Ichigo turned in the direction that Yuzu had nodded, and followed her line of sight back to his friends. They were chanting and cheering, as they gathered around a short, white-haired boy chugging a beer at a rapid pace. Ichigo’s eyes bulged out of his head.

“Toshiro?”

The boy in question was standing atop a plastic garden chair, one hand holding a beer bottle upside down above his mouth, while his other hand stopped Momo from interfering. The girl was trying to jump up and pull the beer out of his hand, but he had his index finger pressed to her forehead, hindering her from getting close. Ichigo would have found the whole sight highly amusing if he wasn’t so taken back by it.

Ichigo gaped; when he had invited Toshiro to come, the prodigy had flat out refused. He knew that the boy hated large social gatherings, and hadn’t been surprised by the response he was given. To see Toshiro here was a complete shock to Ichigo, never mind the fact he was guzzling alcohol even though he said he only drinks ‘sometimes’.

“I won’t let him drink too much either,” Yuzu said softly from behind him.

“You know Toshiro?” Ichigo turned back to face her, surprise obvious on his features.

She nodded, “He plays soccer with Karin and Jinta; the four of us sometimes hang out after the games… Didn’t he tell you? You’re his roommate at college, right?”

Ichigo frowned. Well, that explained why Toshiro was never home on a Saturday; he had thought the boy was working since he was usually gone all day – he hadn’t thought to ask. Why hadn’t Toshiro told him? He would have known the connection between him and his sisters. Ichigo’s heart sank a little; every time he thought he was cracking through Toshiro’s defensive shell, another layer got in the way. He was a little jealous too, that his sisters got to hang out with Toshiro more than he did in a social setting.

Toshiro had finished his drink and jumped off the chair, running off while Momo chased after him. Fortunately for Ichigo, Toshiro had run in his direction. Without a second thought, Ichigo stuck an arm out as the prodigy ran by and snaked it around the boy’s thin torso, dragging him backwards until Toshiro’s spine was pressed firmly against his abdomen. Toshiro craned his neck back and blinked owlishly up at him, obviously confused by the sudden attack on him. He then smirked.

“Kurosaki Senior.” He greeted.

Before Ichigo could retort, Momo burst through the crowd and spotted them instantly. She stomped over, her eyes ablaze with fury.

“Toshiro Hitsugaya!” She yelled at him, snatching the empty bottle from his hand. “Does Granny know that you’re drinking?! You’re sixteen for God’s Sake!”

“I’m seventeen,” Toshiro pouted – extremely cutely, might Ichigo add – and struggled a little in Ichigo’s firm grasp, “and it’s Rangiku’s fault.”

Ichigo chuckled; it probably was Rangiku’s fault. She was very _persuasive_ when it came to roping people into doing what she wanted them to do. Toshiro seemed to be immune to her flirting, but Rangiku still had plenty of ways of getting him to do stuff for her too. Momo must have known it too, because she suddenly sighed and grimaced at the thought. The acceptance didn’t last long for the chocolate-haired girl who frowned deeply, and pointed a dainty finger at Ichigo’s young prisoner, opening her mouth to say – or maybe shout – something else.

“Don’t worry, Momo,” Ichigo intercepted, trying to calm the still quite angry girl. “I’ll look after him tonight.”

“Thanks, Ichigo,” Momo released a sigh of relief. “He can be difficult sometimes.”

“I’m right here,” Toshiro muttered bitterly, now trying to detach Ichigo’s arm from his torso.

“Don’t forget Granny’s birthday is coming up, Shiro,” Momo smiled, leaning down and patting the soft white locks of her cousin, completely ignoring his previous comment. “We’ll have to get her a gift.”

“It was last week, Bed-Wetter,” He snapped, slapping her hand away from his hair. “I knew you’d forget so I sent her flowers from the both of us, and a bracelet that, if she asks, you picked out.”

Momo looked at Ichigo’s little captive with a look of shock and horror on her face. Toshiro was glaring at her. Ichigo’s eyes darted between the two of them as he felt Toshiro’s muscles all tense up in his hold. There was obviously some tension between the two cousins, but since this was the first time he’d seen them together, he wasn’t completely sure where it was stemming from. Eventually Momo took a cautious step back, before leaving with her head hung and a quiet ‘thank you’ to both of them. Toshiro had stopped fighting Ichigo’s tight hold and stood silently waiting to be released. Slowly Ichigo removed his arm from Toshiro’s thin torso, but slid it down to gently grip his wrist and turn him around so that they were facing each other.

“Are you okay?” Ichigo asked, noting that Toshiro was still tensing his muscles, although he was probably unaware of it.

Toshiro stared at him with no emotion in his eyes, “I’m fine. You don’t have to look after me.”

Ichigo knew well enough the signs of Toshiro emotionally shutting down and putting his defensive wall up higher than it already was. From what he could see, Toshiro was physically fine – the one beer obviously not affecting him too much – and that was Ichigo’s main concern tonight. He would deal with the emotional stuff later, when his roommate was a little more relaxed. The one thing Toshiro seemed to hate more than anything else was people treating him like a kid, so Ichigo only nodded and released his arm.

“I see you know my sisters,” Ichigo gestured towards Yuzu, who was still standing beside her brother and watching the interaction between them.

Toshiro nodded, “Karin coerced me into coming tonight.”

_Of course, she did._

“That sounds about right,” Ichigo groaned. “She’s very forceful.”

“That’s how she made me join her soccer team,” Toshiro nodded with a frown.

Ichigo raised an eyebrow, hoping for an explanation.

“I remember that,” Yuzu piped up, giggling a little. “She kicked a soccer ball at his head.”

“Karin,” Ichigo sighed. “It’s always Karin…”

* * *

“Sup, Ni-go.”

“Karin, I swear to God-”

“Relax, Ichi,” Karin smirked, plopping herself down in the vacant chair beside him. “There is only one of you tonight.”

Ichigo sent her a withering glare but was glad to see she had an unopened can of soda in her hand, which obviously didn’t contain any alcohol… yet. As if reading his mind, Karin grinned at him as she opened the can with a crack and took a sip of the vodka-free lemonade.

“Come on, Ichigo,” Karin giggled, nudging his side. “You know how much I love soccer; I’m not going to risk our most important match of the year by playing hungover.”

That was true. Ichigo sometimes thought Karin loved soccer more than she loved their dad. She might have found drinking a new, fun and thrilling experience but she’d never choose it over her beloved sport.

“Important match?”

“We’re playing the team we almost lost to in the grand final last year,” Karin explained. “They weren’t happy that we beat them, and they’ve held a serious grudge. It will be a tough game tomorrow.”

Ichigo was surprised to hear his sister’s team had won the competition last year. He hadn’t gone to the game, but he might have if he had known it was the grand final. He felt a sting in his chest; he couldn’t remember the last game he’d been to… None this year since he’d been at college, but even before that during school he hadn’t gone. It had probably been close to two years since he’d seen his sister play. Ichigo sighed, he was failing as a big brother – Yuzu had a boyfriend, Karin was drinking and playing excellent soccer while Ichigo had no idea what was going on. He made a mental note to put more effort in to seeing his sisters more regularly; maybe he could go watch her game tomorrow? Toshiro would be playing too…

`”Where’s the game tomorrow?” Ichigo asked. “I’ll come watch.”

“Really?”

Ichigo’s heart hurt at how his sister’s face lit up; he should have done this sooner. He nodded.

“It’s at the new field opposite my school, ten o’clock,” Karin beamed.

“Great,” Ichigo smiled at her, throwing his arm loosely over her shoulders and planting a soft kiss on her forehead. He chuckled as she wrinkled her nose in distaste; she’d never been one for affection.

“Make sure Toshiro turns up on time too,” Karin ordered him. “I’m not sure what state he’ll be in tomorrow but he’s our striker and best player. Sober or not, we need him.”

Ichigo’s eye brows shot up. He wasn’t all too surprised that Toshiro was the best soccer player on the team as he seemed to be the best at everything he tried, but was surprised that Karin suspected he might be hungover tomorrow.

“I though Yuzu was limiting his drinks?” Ichigo asked, concern bubbling in his throat.

“She was,” Karin answered, taking another sip of her soda, “but he keeps disappearing and she’s got her hands full trying to stop Jinta from drinking or attacking Renji…”

“Disappearing?” Ichigo repeated, ignoring the Jinta comment for now. “Where’s he going?”

Karin shrugged, “Around. I saw him with his friend Rangiku not long ago…”

Ichigo groaned; he knew Rangiku cared about Toshiro and would protect him, but she’d get him totally wasted first.

“Relax, Ichigo, he was fine when I saw him,” Karin chuckled, as if reading his mind. “He’s always so strained; let him blow off some steam.”

“Why are you devil-kids trying to stress me out?” Ichigo pouted. “Yuzu with her boyfriend, you and Toshiro with your drinking…”

“I’m rebellious and I find drinking fun, but it’s harder for Toshiro,” Karin stood up as if she was preparing to leave. “He goes to college, everyone around him is older and he doesn’t want people to treat him like a kid so he does his best to be an adult.”

Ichigo supposed she was right; Toshiro was much more mature than anyone his own age and if it wasn’t for his physical appearance, most people would consider him an adult. He certainly had his life more together than Ichigo; balancing a full time college degree, karate club, soccer and a part time job, not to mention dealing with Rangiku’s weekly dramas… and despite all that, Toshiro still had time to help out Ichigo when he was sick or didn’t fully understand his university work. Actually, now that he thought about it, Ichigo didn’t know how Toshiro managed it all; Ichigo knew he probably would have had a mental breakdown if he carried around all those burdens every day.

Yuzu had arrived to collect Karin and say goodbye. It was late now; most of the party go-ers had either passed out or left to get the train back to the university before the midnight weekend curfew. Ichigo himself was going to have to leave soon if he wanted to make it. He walked his sisters outside to where their father was parked on the street. Narrowly missing his father’s kick to the head, Ichigo hugged his two sisters ‘goodbye’ and once again promised to be at Karin’s soccer match tomorrow.

Heading back inside to say his own goodbyes, Ichigo kept a vigilant eye out for his young roommate. He patted Renji on the back, thanking him for hosting, and kissed Rukia on the cheek. He’d found them making out in the corner of the yard, and grinned, promising to get the details out of one of them later. Ichigo made his rounds, saying goodbye to a cuddling Izuru and Momo, to Ikkaku and Yumichika – who were arguing like an old married couple – and to Shuuhei and Rangiku, who were looking pretty cosy on porch.

“Ran, you seen Toshiro lately?” Ichigo asked, ignoring the sly grin forming on Shuuhei’s face.

“I saw him head around the side of the house with Renji’s little brother a few minutes ago,” Rangiku supplied, dragging her hand over Shuuhei’s thigh subtly.

Ichigo smirked at Shuuhei’s strained face and turned to leave them to it. He saw Jinta across the yard arguing with Renji after apparently interrupting him and Rukia, but Toshiro was not with him. Continuing around the corner of the house, Ichigo found his target.

Toshiro was leaning back against the outer-wall of the house, while a tall guy with long dark hair loomed over him. The older male had his hands pressed against the wall either side of the boy’s head and his mouth lingering way too close to Toshiro’s. At first, Ichigo thought that they too were hooking up and his heart dropped into his stomach, but then he heard them speaking; it was too muffled for him to understand but Toshiro’s voice was raised and laced with anger. The other guy’s voice sounded rather seductive and sultry. It clicked in Ichigo’s head as he watched the tall stranger push his body flush against Toshiro’s and latch his mouth onto the boy’s slender neck, only to have the young genius firmly shove the guy off him and slip away from the wall; the tall guy was hitting on him and Toshiro wasn’t having a bar of it.

“Toshiro!” Ichigo called loudly, alerting the two of them to his presence.

Teal eyes found his and the boy stumbled over to him, clearly quite tipsy. The tall brunette was calling after him, but Toshiro appeared to ignore him as he came to stand in front of Ichigo. Ichigo took in his appearance; he was dressed rather casually, in tight jeans and a plain white tee, but Ichigo thought he looked hot. He had noticed recently just how well those jeans fit him, perfectly sculpting his ass and upper thighs... Ichigo’s eyes found Toshiro’s face and noted that despite his alcohol-clouded eyes, the boy looked the same as always – his hair still a neat mess, his skin still a creamy pale and his lips still pink and plump.

“I’m heading back to the dorm,” Ichigo swallowed, forcing himself to relocate his stare back to Toshiro’s eyes. “Do you want a lift?”

Without a glance back at the guy who had been coming onto him, Toshiro nodded. Ichigo put a hand on his shoulder, ignoring the small flinch from its owner, and turned to lead his roommate out of the backyard and towards his car.

“Come back here, Slut!” the furious brunette called, and Ichigo swung around, fully prepared to punch the fucker’s lights out, before a small hand fisted his shirt and tugged him along.

The car ride home was silent for the most part. Rangiku had called Toshiro to find out if he was okay and Ichigo was pleasantly surprised to find that Toshiro wasn’t completely drunk as he kept his words un-slurred and made fully articulate sentences. He had taken to playing with the various buttons within his reach though, but Ichigo didn’t mind. It was kind of amusing, actually. So far they’d listened to six different radio stations and Toshiro had silently inspected the items he found in Ichigo’s glove box, which had mostly included registration and insurance papers, the car manual and a bit of emergency cash for petrol.

“Who was the guy that you were, uh, _talking to_ before we left?” Ichigo asked, trying to sound as casual as possible.

“Kusaka,” Toshiro answered, pressing the button on his side and watching as the car window descended with a soft whirring sound, “He does karate. We were friends.”

“He didn’t look like your friend,” Ichigo frowned, recalling how the larger man had Toshiro backed against the wall and began forcing himself on the boy, not to mention that last comment he’d made.

“We _were_ friends,” Toshiro repeated with bitterness in his voice. “He’s an asshole now.”

“Oh,” Ichigo responded dumbly, not sure what else to say.

Toshiro pulled up on the button and watched absently as the window climbed back up the door frame slowly.

“Are you mad I didn’t tell you that I know your sisters?” Toshiro asked him out of the blue, taking his focus off the window to play with the seat adjuster.

Ichigo shrugged, trying to play it off nonchalantly, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“A few reasons,” Toshiro answered as his car seat slowly reclined at his control, “but you should know that Karin didn’t want you to know either.”

“What?” Ichigo frowned. “Why not?”

“She’s upset that you never come to watch her play soccer anymore,” Toshiro answered, laying down in his now fully reclined seat and folding his arms under his head for support. “She said that if you knew I played for her soccer team, you’d come watch a game, but you’d be coming for me and not for her… I think she’s a little bitter that you haven’t made the effort for her in a while.”

Ichigo sighed sadly; he didn’t realise how much his sister had been affected by his neglect. It was his own fault for making her feel like this and act out; he hadn’t been home in ages, despite living under twenty minutes away and having his own car, and he hadn’t called that often either.

“Well, I’m coming to the game tomorrow,” Ichigo said softly. “Maybe I’ll take the girls out for lunch afterwards…”

“I think they’d like that,” Toshiro mumbled, rolling over in his seat – hindered somewhat by the seat belt, and beginning to doze off.

Ichigo couldn’t help but smile.


	7. Saturn At Opposition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro hates that he feels the need to make his roommate smile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I keep forgetting that I am supposed to be posting these chapters on Saturday mornings, someone remindddddd meeeeeee :(

Toshiro sat at the kitchen table, one hand clutching his morning mug of green tea and the other hovering an inch from his face, only just managing to hold on to a piece of toast. He was debating on whether eating it would make him feel any better or not. Food was the absolute last thing he felt like, but he knew that he needed something in his stomach if he was going to play ninety minutes of soccer under the summer sun.

He had drunk more last night than he had intended to and was feeling it this morning. Still not the worst hangover he’d ever experienced though, since he hadn’t felt the need to vomit yet. Toshiro was annoyed at himself for drinking as much as he did, not that he really embarrassed himself or did anything stupid, but because he’d let Momo get to him. The second Momo had spotted him with a beer, she’d freaked out and demanded he put it down, and as a result he decided to chug it right in front of her in order to make her angry.

Sometimes he would do stuff like that, to make her mad or annoyed, or even to hurt her a little bit… but mostly he just wanted her to notice him. Toshiro hated that he did it, but he just couldn’t stop himself once he had started. Things between him and his cousin had been a little tense for a few years now. Momo had moved in with him and their granny during her last year of high school as her parents had relocated to the USA for work and she opted to stay behind to complete her education in Japan.

The two of them had always been close, so obviously he’d been ecstatic to hear that she’d be coming to live with them. At first it was great, they’d hung out just like they used to… but then the age gap began to show, especially at school. Since Toshiro had skipped quite a few grades, he had ended up in the same graduating class as Momo, but she was eighteen and he was sixteen. Toshiro hadn’t kept many friends at school and spent most of his time avoiding his classmates outside of the classroom, especially the guy who made his school day a living hell; Sosuke Aizen. Unfortunately it was the same fucker that Momo ended up ‘falling in love with’.

Momo became obsessed with him, following him around like a love sick puppy and doing anything and everything he asked. It disgusted Toshiro. He had tried to tell his cousin that Aizen was a bad guy, that he was just using her to make him jealous, but that had not gone over well. As the year went by, Momo spent more time with her friends and boyfriend, and Toshiro was left alone. Even at home, she’d be on her phone or laptop all night talking to them, never leaving her bedroom. She didn’t want to hang out with Toshiro anymore. The worst part was that she didn’t even notice; she wasn’t ignoring him to hurt him or anything, she simply just grew up and moved on. It fucking stung.

These days – now that Aizen had dumped her for another girl – she’d moved to Karakura to attend college. She lived in a small apartment with her friends, the Kotetsu sisters, and was dating the much nicer Izuru Kira. Her relationship with Toshiro, however, had not improved. She was still busy with her new friends and boyfriend, she still lived off her phone, and she still forgot things like Granny’s birthday. Toshiro doubted she even called their grandmother regularly like he did. Momo was just too busy. He did things like drinking in front of her just to gain her attention, to silently say the things he wanted to say, like ‘I miss you.’

“Glare any harder at that toast and it might just burst into flames.”

Toshiro jerked up in surprise, dropping his toast back onto the plate. He hadn’t heard Ichigo exit his bedroom.

“Feeling okay there, Toshiro?” Ichigo asked, his amusement morphing into concern.

“Fine,” Toshiro muttered, picking his toast back up and taking a hesitant bite, “and it’s ‘Hitsugaya’…”

Ichigo shrugged and continued on his way to the bathroom for his morning shower. Toshiro slowly finished his toast and shakily rose to his feet before placing his dirty dishes in the sink and returning to his bedroom. He planned to take a quick twenty minute nap before getting back up for soccer. He recalled Ichigo last night telling him to sleep in and take his time in the morning since he could drive them both down to the field, as Ichigo would be coming to watch his sister play. Toshiro was suddenly very grateful that the strawberry had chosen this weekend to watch their game, allowing him more time to recover from his moderate hangover.

Exiting his room half an hour later, Toshiro met Ichigo by the door dressed in his soccer uniform. He was kind of glad now that Ichigo knew he played soccer with his sister, if only for the fact he could leave the dorm wearing his uniform. Ichigo hadn’t got mad that Toshiro hadn’t told him the truth – although Toshiro strongly suspected he was. Toshiro did feel bad about keeping it from him, he hadn’t meant to hurt his roommate, in fact he’d been trying to stop him from getting hurt, but he knew he had gone the wrong way about it. Maybe he could make it up to him later; calling him by his first name perhaps? That always put a stupid smile on his face. Well, it had the one time he’d used it so it was likely to have the same reaction again.

“You ready?” Toshiro asked, becoming acutely aware that his roommate was staring at him silently.

The strawberry himself was wearing tight purple jeans and an even tighter – if that was possible – black tee and skater shoes to match. Being gay, Toshiro had to admire his roommate’s physic; Ichigo was relatively lean (not as lean as himself, but lean nonetheless), but his muscles were toned and clearly defined. It was kind of… _sexy_ , actually. Toshiro’s heart skipped a beat; did he just consider his roommate sexy? His idiotic, happy-go-lucky, orange-haired, too-caring-for-his-own-good roommate? He shuddered at the thought.

“You look good in red,” Ichigo answered eventually. “Come on, let’s get going.”

Ichigo pulled open the door and marched out into the hallway. Toshiro wasn’t completely sure but for a second there, he thought he saw a flicker of lust in his roommate’s eyes. He might have been wrong, of course, but he swore he saw a certain darkness in those chocolate eyes, coupled with an expression of longing. He often wondered if Ichigo was gay; he was about eighty percent sure that he was – if the tightness of his clothes were anything to go by – and Rangiku seemed to agree, given that she had pushed her breasts up against him that many times and each time the orange-haired male appeared not to pay it much attention… Although Rangiku could be pretty full of herself when it came to her looks and, in particular, those deadly weapons she had the nerve to call ‘boobs’.

Ichigo and Toshiro arrived at the field about ten minutes later, and Ichigo was immediately accosted by his two sisters. Karin had actually gone for Toshiro first, but he’d blocked her hug attack as he did every week, side stepped, and made his way over to the much less affectionate Jinta.

“What’s so good about Ichigo anyway?” Jinta grumbled as he sat on the grass putting on his shin guards. “Yuzu is obsessed with him – they both are.”

“Jealous, Abarai?” Toshiro smirked, dropping down beside him.

“No!” Jinta spluttered. “I just don’t get what the big deal is about him; I hate my brother.”

Toshiro shrugged, “I wouldn’t know; I don’t have a brother.”

“You can have Renji if you want.”

“I’ll pass.”

* * *

Heart hammering in his chest and blood pounding in his ears, Toshiro glanced up at the scoreboard while Jinta collected the ball for a throw in.

One all, with two minutes to spare.

It had been a gruelling eighty-eight minutes. The opposition were tough and many of them had improved since the grand final last year. They also had a couple of new players; one large boy in particular who played defence. He was probably almost twice Toshiro’s size, but his stature didn’t slow him down any. Since Toshiro played striker, the giant had practically been glued to his side since the opening whistle. Karin played forward and wasn’t much better off; the other team had obviously improved their marking skills. Jinta struggled to hold the defensive line too, as the opposition had a number of fast forward and midfield players. They had a goal scored against them in the first few minutes. Toshiro had scored next, just before half time, leaving the score at one all ever since.

Jinta paused as he brought the ball up to the side line. His eyes found Toshiro’s who quickly found Karin’s. They had less than two minutes. Between the three of them, they could finish this. Their teammates knew it too, as they ran around, calling for the ball and trying to throw off their markers. Jinta smirked and ran up to the line, pulling his arms up behind his head and launching the ball right to Toshiro. As suspected, Toshiro’s large marker nudged him out of the way and caught the ball on his chest before dropping it to his feet. Toshiro took his chance and slid though the gap, kicking the ball back towards his own goal where Jinta had now sprinted to, completely unmarked.

As Jinta received the ball, most of the opposition team ran towards him in order to take advantage of the fact that the ball was now back in the half they needed it to be in. Just before they got close enough to stop him, Jinta belted the ball back down field to Karin, who was left unmarked when the other team had run for Jinta. She remained on side as she travelled down the field with the ball, waiting for the large defensive player to make his mistake. And then he did; the bulky seventeen year old left Toshiro’s side and ran for her as the rest of his team scrambled to catch up from the other end of the field. With the large kid only a few bounds away from her Karin, jumped over the ball and kicked it back with her heel, straight to Toshiro who had swung around behind her. Toshiro ran with the ball, continuing out wide away from the large player who was still in front of him. The guy was big and speedy but his adrenalin was running thin and his breathing more ragged; he couldn’t keep up with their agility anymore.

They were only a few meters from the goal posts when Toshiro narrowly missed the giant’s tackle and passed off to Karin, who pulled back her right leg and kicked the ball harder than he’d ever seen her kick before. The ball shot right into the back of the net, the opposition’s goal keeper missing it by a hair’s width. Three whistles signalled full time as the scoreboard flipped over to two-one. Toshiro’s team had won.

He felt a sudden weight on his back as Karin jumped on him in celebration. Not at all ready for it, Toshiro collapsed face first onto the ground as she cheered on top of him.

“Shit, Kurosaki,” He gasped into the grass, completely winded. “Get off!”

He heard her chuckle before she eventually rolled off him. Still trying to breathe, Toshiro slowly turned over and sat up. The team was running around the field, celebrating loudly. Jinta had gone straight for Yuzu and the two of them were embracing just off the sideline. Karin had now jumped up too, running straight for Ichigo as he jogged towards them. Pulling himself up, Toshiro brushed off the dirt of his uniform and watched with a melancholy half-smile as Karin and Ichigo were joined by their father and then Yuzu and Jinta. Jinta was included in their group-family hug, and Toshiro was left wishing – not for the first time in his life – that he had a big loving family too. He had Granny though, and he wouldn’t trade her for anything.

“Toshiro!” Ichigo called after he’d broken out of the family hold. “You guys were amazing!”

Toshiro shrugged, “Team work, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Ichigo beamed. “Hey, I’m taking my sisters out for lunch and a movie, do you want to come? Yuzu is bringing Jinta; I might need you around to stop me in case I try to deck him…”

“I can’t, I’m busy this afternoon,” Toshiro replied truthfully. “Karin, I’m sure, will keep the both of you in line.”

“Oh,” Ichigo’s smile dropped a little, “Okay, well I’ll see you later then.”

Damn that kicked puppy look.

“Ichigo” Toshiro called after him before he could get too far away.

The first name trick seemed to work, as the tall strawberry turned back around with a striking smile on his dopey face.

“Um, thank you… for the offer, I mean,” Toshiro cringed at how pathetic he felt right now. “Maybe another time?”

Ichigo’s face lit up. Toshiro had to consciously halt his own smile from forming. He was rather uncomfortable with the fact that he felt the incessant need to keep his roommate happy, lest he wanted to walk around under a cloud of guilt for the rest of the day.

“Yeah, definitely!” Ichigo exclaimed cheerfully. “I look forward to it.”

Toshiro nodded and quickly turned away, walking straight off the field. He really was busy this afternoon. He had to go buy a new book in order to finish his latest college assignment and he had to go across town to the national geographic store to pick up a new tripod stand for his telescope, since he had accidently left his at Granny’s before university started back up. Saturn was at opposition tonight, which was one of his favourite yearly celestial events. Being a budding astrophysicist, he could hardly miss it.

Speaking of Granny, he needed to ring her. He called her every weekend to check in. They were only two weeks shy of the summer break, which meant that although he’d be seeing her soon, he’d been away for over three months and he missed her terribly. He missed her soft voice, and wrinkled hands. He missed her old-people smell and her cooking. He just missed her, all of her.

Whipping out his phone, he quickly called his grandmother’s home.

_“Hello?”_

“Granny, it’s me,” Toshiro smiled at the sound of her voice. “How are you today?”

 _“Oh Toshiro, my boy, I am well,”_ His grandmother replied. _“Did you win your soccer game?”_

“Yes, two-one, it was a very tough game.”

_“Wonderful, dear, I’ve always said that you were-”_

Toshiro heard harsh coughing on the other end, and his blood stopped cold.

“Granny?”

 _“I’m fine, Toshiro,”_ Granny continued to cough, although not as full on as a second ago. _“Just a cold.”_

“Don’t lie to me, Granny,” Toshiro whispered. “Your sickness; it’s back, isn’t it?”

 _“Of course not, dear,”_ Granny continued, but he could always tell when she was putting on a brave voice for him. _“It’s just a mild cough, nothing for you to worry about.”_

“Granny, I-”

 _“No, Toshiro,”_ His grandmother spoke firmly. _“You have two weeks left, and then you can come home. I am fine.”_

She knew what he was about to suggest; she always did. He wanted to be with her and make sure she was, in fact, ‘fine’. He loved college, but he hated being away from her, especially if her old sickness had returned. She had been diagnosed with lung cancer a few years ago, but since he’d finished high school, she had been in remission. All of the doctors tests had come back saying that there was no evidence of the disease in her body, but the oncologist had been very specific in saying that she was not fully ‘cured’ – there could be hidden cancer cells still in her body, and if they come back, it will most likely be within five years of the original diagnosis. It had only been three years.

“Do you promise?”

 _“I promise, Toshiro,”_ She said softly.

Toshiro took a deep breath. He’d never known Granny to lie to him, but he wouldn’t have put it past her if she felt like he needed to hear it. Either way, he knew she would stick to her story; he got his stubbornness from her after all. He silently compromised with himself to let it go today, but he’d call midweek to check up on her.

 _“Now, little one,”_ His grandmother moved on when he did not reply. _“Tell me about your week, and how is Momo going?”_

* * *

“Rangiku said you’d be up here.”

Toshiro looked up from his notebook as Ichigo’s voice rang out from behind him. He’d been sitting on the roof of the boarding house for well over two hours now, switching between gazing through his telescope and writing his notes. He had also sketched a picture of Saturn in his time up here.

“She also said to bring you this,” Ichigo continued, handing him the blanket that usually hung over the back of the couch or draped over the end of his bed. His grandmother had knitted it for him many years ago.

“Thanks,” Toshiro muttered, gratefully taking the blanket.

He lifted his notebook up to slip the blanket over his legs before setting it back down in his lap. Toshiro began to continue his work when he noticed Ichigo taking a seat next to him, and draping his own blanket over himself.

“I also brought you coffee,” Ichigo said softly before handing Toshiro a travel mug. “Apparently you’re going to be up here for a while…”

Toshiro raised an eyebrow as he took the mug from Ichigo. Opening the lid, Toshiro’s sense of smell was overwhelmed with the delicious scent of strong coffee. He took a hesitant sip, and almost moaned at the exquisite taste; black, one sugar, the way he liked it. Damn, Ichigo was fucking spectacular at making his favourite hot beverages. If the orange-haired idiot’s career as a doctor falls through, he’d still have a bright future as a barista.

“What are we looking at, Toshiro?” Ichigo asked, gesturing to the telescope.

Not missing the ‘we’ in that question, Toshiro wondered if Ichigo was planning to stay up here all night with him. Part of him wanted the strawberry’s rather unique company, but he also knew that he’d never get any work done with that bloody chatterbox beside him.

“Saturn,” Toshiro answered coolly. “It’s at opposition tonight.”

“Okay, cool,” Ichigo clapped his hands together. “Uh, what does that mean?”

Toshiro hid his small smile at Ichigo’s enthusiasm and leaned forward to look into his telescope. Saturn sat on a bed of ebony velvet in all her glory. The rings, and most obvious indicator that the planet he was looking at was indeed Saturn, circled the large planet almost… protectively. Saturn had always been his favourite planet; at a glance, it was different and so was he.

“It means that Saturn and Earth are in a direct line on the same side of the sun,” Toshiro explained. “It’s the time when they are the closest together.”

Ichigo nodded a few times slowly, before frowning and shaking his head.

“Take a look,” Toshiro suggested, tapping his pen to the side of the telescope.

Delighted, Ichigo hovered over the eye piece before settling down to look through it. Toshiro smirked as the strawberry’s jaw dropped in fascination before turning up in the corners. The prodigy himself took to drawing a very simplified diagram of the solar system; the sun sitting rightfully in the centre.

“This is Saturn?” Ichigo exclaimed, “It’s beautiful… Is it always so bright?”

“No, that’s the Seeliger Effect,” Toshiro answered, continuing with his sketch. “Saturn is being fully illuminated by the sun, and any shadows are being cast directly behind it, thus the brighter, clearer view we get.”

Ichigo pulled back from the telescope, “Illuminated by the sun?”

Toshiro held up his diagram, pointing at Sun. “All planets orbit the sun. Earth is third from the sun, and considered an ‘inner planet’. Saturn is sixth from the sun and is an ‘outer planet’. When Saturn is at opposition, she lines up with Earth on the same side of the sun.”

As he explained the celestial event, Toshiro used his finger to indicate to each planet – or star – as he talked about it. In a single straight line, from left to right, went the Sun, then Earth and finally Saturn.

“Earth is in between the Sun and Saturn, and therefore, from our perspective, the Sun behind us illuminates Saturn in front of us, giving it the brighter appearance and making it easier for us to see.”

Ichigo grinned as he understood. The future doctor was definitely a visual learner, as Toshiro had discovered when he’d first started helping Ichigo with his college work.

“You really love Space, don’t you?” Ichigo asked somewhat rhetorically, as he took the notebook from Toshiro’s hands and flipped through the various drawings, notes and diagrams. “Is this even for class?”

“No,” Toshiro shrugged. “We had to observe Jupiter at opposition for an assignment last year, but I would have done it anyway; I just find it fascinating, I guess.”

“How often do you come up here?” Ichigo asked, gazing up at him in awe. Sometimes he looked at Toshiro that way, but the prodigy had no idea why.

“Whenever there is a celestial event that I can see through my telescope,” Toshiro answered, “I used to spend most nights on the roof at my grandmother’s house. Where she lives, the stars are much clearer.”

Ichigo smiled. Not just a little, mildly happy smile, but a full blown, genuinely ecstatic grin. Toshiro could feel goosebumps tingling on his arm and he was sure that if he’d been standing up his knees would have gone weak. Ichigo’s smile wasn’t just the turning up of his lips, but it was the little dimple hidden in his cheek that appeared and the light in his eyes, not to mention the visible rows of perfect pearly white teeth. Toshiro stared; never had a smile taken such an effect on him. Part of him loved the feeling it gave him, but part of him was scared shitless; he shouldn’t be so easily undone by something as simple as a smile, especially not the one of his stupid strawberry roommate.

A smile was not the only thing that Toshiro became suddenly aware of; he could feel the warmth radiating of Ichigo. He hadn’t noticed before, but the outside of their thighs were touching as they sat next to each other, covered only by the thin blankets over their legs. So close that Toshiro would only have to lean a few degrees over to rest his head on the orange-haired teen’s arm, and close enough for Toshiro to see the goosebumps on Ichigo’s skin and the little hairs on his arm sticking up. At least he wasn’t the only one; maybe it was colder up here than he realised.

“You’re cold,” Toshiro stated, gesturing to Ichigo’s arm.

“So are you,” Ichigo smirked, his long fingers skimming gently over Toshiro’s own goosebumps-ridden arm.

Toshiro didn’t reply; he was too busy trying to focus on anything other than the fiery trail left in the wake of those skilful digits, or the jolt that had passed through his body on their initial contact with his skin, similar to that of an electric shock. It felt like his heart had literally just stopped for a second, and was now beating at overtime in order to catch up. He sure didn’t feel cold.

“Come on, it’s late,” Ichigo mumbled, his face popping into Toshiro’s personal space and causing the prodigy to lean back away from it. “Let’s go inside.”

Toshiro could only nod.


	8. Happy Birthday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Ichigo's birthday and the last day of college before the summer break!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I posting on time today? Surely not

_July fifteen._

July fifteen was good for two reasons; Number one, it was Ichigo’s twentieth birthday, and number two, it was the last day of school! Summer break started tomorrow and, although Ichigo still loved college, he was well overdue for a holiday. He didn’t have any major plans; he was going to go back home, see his sisters, help out his father at the clinic and catch up with his old high school friends – Orihime, Tatsuki, etc. Since Renji also lived pretty close by, they’d both agreed to hang out over the break and maybe go to a basketball game or something. But before he could go on break, he needed to get through the day first.

Ichigo had just returned to the dorm after breakfast. Renji and Shuuhei had started singing ‘ _Happy Birthday’_ to him in the loudest, most out of tune way possible, and given the high spirits of the other students on the last day of school, almost everyone in the dining hall had joined in on the ludicrous singing. It had been rather embarrassing actually, but Ichigo was still touched nevertheless, especially when Izuru and Chad had brought out a breakfast muffin with a large ‘19’ candle sitting on top. On his way out of the hall, people he didn’t even know were patting him on the back and wishing him a good day and holidays, while most commented that now he was able to go clubbing.

Still chuckling about it, Ichigo stuck his keys into the lock of his dorm room and entered. He was immediately suffocated by two giant breasts and two long arms squeezing around his neck like a python. _Rangiku – who else?_

He could barely hear Rangiku’s happy squeals above him from his position wedged between the mounds of her chest. His arms flailed about but she did not let go. In the end, he just gave up, slumping limply against her and waiting for his impending death on his twentieth birthday. If he had been straight, this probably would have been a good way to go. Shuuhei seemed to think it was.

Ichigo heard another muffled voice off his right side. It was much deeper and even though he was starting to feel rather light-headed from the lack of oxygen, he knew that voice anywhere.

_Toshiro._

Rangiku released him with a whine, and Ichigo dropped straight onto his knees, putting his arms out last minute to avoid face planting the cold floorboards. He struggled to regain his breath as he lay down gently and rolled on to his back.

“Fuck, Rangiku,” He wheezed. “You’re…deadly…”

Rangiku’s bright face loomed above his, her smile wide and mischievous.

“Happy birthday, Ichigo!” She cooed, poking him in the cheek. “Get off the floor, Silly.”

Ichigo, having regained enough breath to stop the world from spinning around him, sat up with a loud groan. Grumbling mild obscenities, he accepted Rangiku’s outstretched hand and pulled himself to his feet.

His eyes found Toshiro, who was leaning back against the kitchen sink, tea in hand and sipping it nonchalantly, like this was just a normal morning in his book. The white-haired genius was probably just glad to not be the victim of Rangiku’s unyielding ‘hugs’, as she called them, this time round. He looked as gorgeous as ever, Ichigo withheld a blush as he looked over his roommate subtly; he was wearing jeans (tight as always) and a simple band tee, no longer requiring one of his baggy sweaters or loose cardigans in this summer heat. Ichigo didn’t mind either way; the oversized hoodies making him look adorable and cuddly, but the t-shirts showing of his lean but muscular arms and his beautifully slender frame.

“Ichigo,” Rangiku called. “Yoo-hoo, oh Ichigo!”

Ichigo turned to face her, preparing to snap an irritated ‘what?!’ in her direction, but when he faced her he had expected her to be much further away, instead her face was mere inches from his. Ichigo jerked back in surprise, while she erupted in a fit of evil witch-like cackles. She smirked at him, her eyes almost glowing with mischief. She nodded in Toshiro’s direction – the boy now turned away from them, rinsing his tea cup in the sink – and winking provocatively. Ichigo’s jaw dropped at the suggestion she was making; if Rangiku knew he liked Toshiro, it would be game over; the whole school would know before lunch.

Ichigo glared at her, and tried to shake his head in silent denial, but she continued to tease him, making kissy faces and mouthing the words ‘you love him’.

“Rangiku,” Toshiro called, turning back around to meet a startled Ichigo and a way-too-innocent Rangiku. “I have to get going, move this along.”

Rangiku’s face morphed into one of absolute joy and Ichigo, now completely on edge in her presence, watched her reach into her bag with a sense of dread pooling his stomach. She pulled out a wrapped gift and a card, and handed it to him.

“Happy birthday, Ichigo,” She repeated, genuinely cheerful, and handed him the gift.

Ichigo reached out and took the gift from her hands, still not altogether convinced it wasn’t something embarrassing hidden underneath the thin wrapping paper; the wrapping paper which was light blue in colour and covered in small cartoon strawberries, each with arms and legs and giant smiles. Opening the card first, he found that it was actually a photo of him, Rangiku and Toshiro printed on thin cardboard, and folded over to make a card. Ichigo remembered that photo – She’d been in their dorm all afternoon after she’d come back from breaking up with Gin Ichimaru. Once they’d cheered her up, she had insisted on taking a ‘ _selfie_ ’ with the three of them to mark the ‘strengthening of their friendship’ or some shit. Rangiku sat in the middle of them on the couch, smiling widely, while Ichigo and Toshiro sat beside her with matching, completely unimpressed expressions.

Chuckling softly, Ichigo opened the card. He was greeted with the curvy scroll of Rangiku, wishing him a happy birthday and best wishes, but Ichigo’s eyes had skipped straight to the bottom, where the card was signed off, “Love Rangiku and Toshiro, xoxo”, except that ‘Toshiro’ had been crossed off and re-written underneath as ‘Hitsugaya’ in Toshiro’s perfect hand-writing.

“Toshiro, this is from you too?” Ichigo asked, glancing over at the frowning prodigy.

“Well, I had to monitor the stuff Rangiku was going to give you,” Toshiro answered, Ichigo not missing the light blush adorning his soft cheeks. “Trust me it was much more inappropriate before I got to it… I also ended up paying for it, so I felt that my name should at least go on the card.”

Ichigo laughed softly, glancing at a rather sheepish looking Rangiku. He was suddenly very curious to know what was in under the gift wrap. He placed the card on the table, knowing he’d be keeping a hold of that for a long time, and slowly began to un-wrap his gift. Sliding his finger under the tape, and cautiously pulling off the paper, Ichigo soon held the present in his hands, or presents since there were a few.

A band tee, of a band almost nobody knew of but was one of his absolute favourites. He had tried looking online for one of their t-shirts but had never been successful.

A new pair of decent earphones; the rubber had come off most of his old pair and a few of the exposed wires had snapped. When he wanted to listen to music, he had to hold the cord at a special angle and keep it there, which was very annoying and tiring. With this gift, he could now listen to music as the gym again.

A box of his favourite chocolate, which incidentally and rather embarrassingly had strawberry filling, as well as crunchy honeycomb flakes.

A packet of pens, with a yellow post it note stuck on the front. The note was written in Toshiro’s slanted script and read “stay out of my room, pen thief.” Ichigo smirked, he was going into the boy’s room at least once a week nowadays looking for pens, ironic since that was the excuse he used when he’d been snooping but now he actually needed them.

And last but not least, the latest volume of his new favourite manga and a magazine with a semi-naked man on the front, _Wait, what?!_

Rangiku burst into a round of giggles upon seeing the colour draining from his face. Toshiro had come over to see what was cracking his best friend up and upon seeing the magazine, Toshiro’s face had done the opposite of Ichigo’s, going beet red.

“Rangiku!” He snapped. “I told you not to put that one in there!”

“Aww, but Toshiro,” She whined, throwing an arm around his shoulders. “You wouldn’t let me put any of that other stuff in there. I just had to sneak this one in.”

“What other stuff?” Ichigo asked incredulously, but seeing the horrifyingly naughty expression on Rangiku’s face and the shiver that racked Toshiro’s body at the mere thought, he decided he’d rather not know. “Actually don’t tell me, please.”

Toshiro pried himself out of Rangiku’s grasp and moved around the opposite side of the table, throwing his school bag over his shoulder on the way.

“I’ve gotta go,” He said, glaring at Rangiku and marching towards the door.

“Wait, Toshiro,” Ichigo called, stopping the boy before he could get to the door. Toshiro turned around to face him slowly. “Thanks for the gifts, I love them. Well, not the magazine, but the rest. Thanks.”

Toshiro nodded curtly, “Happy birthday, Kurosaki.”

And with that, the seventeen year old was gone; disappearing out the door in a flash. Ichigo smiled fondly at the now empty space; Toshiro had actually gotten him a birthday present and wished him a happy birthday. He hadn’t even been sure if the boy had known his birthday was coming up, let alone expected to get a gift. Sure, Rangiku had probably pushed him into it, but Ichigo was prepared to overlook that because he had just got a gift from his crush and subsequently, was on cloud nine. He was over the moon, to be honest.

Turning back around, Ichigo came face to face with Rangiku. He had almost forgotten she was still there, and leapt back in shock, hand over his heart.

“So, Ichigo…” She sauntered over to him, with a Cheshire cat grin on her face. “You like Toshiro, then?”

Ichigo stepped one foot back for every step she took forward, but soon found himself pinned against the front door, with her face right up in front of him. He tried to splutter out some sort of denial but the words died in his throat. Rangiku was a lot of things, and intimidating was one of them. In the end, he could only nod the truth.

Rangiku squealed louder than ever, and Ichigo almost had to cover his ears. She threw her arms around him and pulled him into a proper, non-suffocating hug.

“I knew it, I knew it!” She jumped up and down with him. “This is amazing!”

“Rangiku,” Ichigo warned, pulling out from her grasp. “You can’t tell anyone… Especially Toshiro, okay?”

“I won’t, I promise,” Rangiku exclaimed, now holding onto his hands and still jumping on the spot.

“You sure?” Ichigo tested. “You’re the school gossip, Ran.”

Rangiku smacked his arm playfully, “This is different. I want you and Toshiro to get together just as much as you do, and I know how long it takes to get him to come around, so I won’t do anything to wreck it, don’t worry. I’ll even help you.”

“You’d do that?” Ichigo asked, a little shocked at the genuine geniality she was showing him.

Rangiku nodded, “I just want him to be happy.”

Ichigo took in her words. She just wanted Toshiro to be happy. Rangiku was crazy, and mischievous, often described as lazy but there was one person she’d do absolutely anything for, and that person just happened to be Ichigo’s crush.

“Okay,” Ichigo agreed. “And you think this could work? I mean, he could really like me one day?”

“Well, he is gay, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Rangiku said, tapping her chin lightly. “He says it’s my fault for turning him against boobs, but he was gay long before I came along…”

“No, I mean, Toshiro is a tough nut to crack at times,” Ichigo corrected, although incredibly relieved to know Toshiro was at least on his team. “How is he ever going to accept that I like him, and moreover, like me back?”

“Ichigo,” Rangiku said seriously. “He already does like you.”

“What?” Ichigo exclaimed.

“He doesn’t know it yet, but he really does like you, Ichigo,” She said with a half-shrug. “It’s hard for him to open up to anyone, but there are currently three people in the world that he will open up too, and you and I are two of them.”

“And Momo?” Ichigo guessed, still not sure that he made the top three in Toshiro’s book.

“No, he hasn’t opened up to her in a while now,” Rangiku sighed. “Granny’s the third.”

“And what about my sisters? Or Renji’s brother?” Ichigo questioned. “They seem to know quite a bit about him.”

Rangiku snorted a laugh, “If they know anything, it’s because they forced it out of him. The point is, he opens up to you more than he does most other people.”

Ichigo ran a hand through his hair in shock. He couldn’t believe that Toshiro trusted him enough to open up to him over almost everyone else. Sure, he wasn’t as exposed or vulnerable as he would probably get around Rangiku in their alone time, but still, he was third from the top and had only know him for four months. Ichigo let himself smile; he hadn’t realised how much ground he had made with the boy since the first night in the dorm but now that he thought about it, he’d come quite far.

“Ichigo,” Rangiku grabbed his chin and forced him to look into her steely blue eyes. “If you want this to work, you have to be prepared to take the time to build his trust.”

Ichigo nodded. Taking advice from Rangiku wasn’t something he thought he was ever going to do, but she did know the prodigy better than anyone at the university.

“Just keep doing what you’re doing; he’s coming around, trust me,” She continued. “But be careful, it only takes one stupid mistake to ruin all your progress. Toshiro doesn’t trust easy, and he’ll pull away the second things start to look bad.”

“Thanks, Rangiku.” Ichigo uttered, considering pulling out a book and one of his new pens to take notes.

Rangiku gathered her own bag and made her way to the door, before throwing him one last pointed look.

“Hurt him, and I’ll break your neck,” She growled, all traces of that fun-loving girl gone out the window. “I’ll cut off your balls and then break your fucking neck, is that clear?”

Ichigo swallowed harshly, “Crystal.”

“Okay then!” She smiled broadly, as if she hadn’t just been threatening to rid him of his genitals and then kill him. “See you later, Ichigo, and have a happy birthday!”

And with that, Rangiku was out of the room, the only trace of her was the lingering scent of her floral perfume.

Ichigo felt the blood rush to his head, and had to lean against the wall to hold himself up. He felt like he was going to faint.

* * *

Ichigo awoke the morning after his birthday with a pounding headache and an uncomfortable tug in his stomach. As yesterday was the last day of school and also his birthday, there had been a large dorm party to celebrate. Most of the students weren’t leaving for home until this morning or were staying at the university over the holidays, so almost the whole boarding house had been up for a big one. Ichigo himself had gotten utterly wasted – now that driving wasn’t an issue – in Chad and Renji’s dorm before moving along the hallway, dorm room after dorm room, collecting more drinks and friends along the way. The later the night got, the less he could remember.

Sticking his arm out to his bedside table, Ichigo patted around, looking for a glass of water, or anything to sooth his dry mouth, but there was nothing. Glancing at the alarm clock, Ichigo found that it was well after ten o’clock. He groaned, and shielded his eyes from the light streaming in through his window.

He couldn’t remember getting back to his dorm. The last thing he remembered was… Ichigo’s mind went blank. He recalled seeing Toshiro when he’d reached the girls dorms; the prodigy was in Rangiku’s bathroom, holding the girl’s strawberry blonde hair back while she vomited into the toilet. He hadn’t been altogether sober himself, if Ichigo recalled, but in comparison with himself and Rangiku, the white-haired stunner was in much better shape.

Actually now that he was thinking about the boy, Ichigo could vaguely remember Toshiro physically supporting him at one point. They were walking… somewhere… Ichigo’s arm slung over Toshiro’s shoulders as he staggered along… Was it the hallway of the boarding house? Probably. He’d been singing, that much he remembered. He’d been so drunk and happy to see Toshiro, that he began singing “Lean On Me” – in fairly terrible English –and laughing because that was exactly what he was doing; leaning on Toshiro. _Oh God,_ Ichigo cringed, that was embarrassing. Toshiro must have been taking him back to the dorm.

Ichigo groaned as he sat up and pulled himself out of bed. He needed some painkillers, water and greasy fried foods pronto. He also needed a shower, since he smelt like bourbon and coke, and apparently he’d spilt some on himself, because his right arm was sticky. He swayed a little as he stood up, and his eyes took a moment to focus. He must have drunk a lot last night; he was still wearing his clothes from the night before. Ichigo stumbled a little on his way to the bedroom door and braced himself to face Toshiro on the other side; he had a feeling that the young genius was not going to be entirely happy with him.

The first thing that hit Ichigo when he opened his door was the smell wafting out of the kitchen. Bacon, delicious fried bacon. His mouth watered, especially when the scent of cooked eggs, mushrooms and tomatoes joined in. Was Toshiro cooking for him? No, the prodigy was sitting at the kitchen table with a plate of assorted fried goods in front of him, forking it idly, with a small frown on his tired face. That, and they didn’t have a stove-top to cook with.

Ichigo’s eyes wandered over the other occupants of the room. Rangiku sat at the table too, her hair a complete mess, make up smudged and still wearing her dress from last night, but with one of Toshiro’s hoodies slung over her shoulders. Had she slept here? She looked much worse than what Ichigo felt like, and she too was playing with her food. Lastly, a little old lady that Ichigo didn’t recognise was sitting at the table between them, serving up another plate of breakfast. She was rather tiny, with light grey hair tied into a neat bun and large, doting eyes.

“Ichigo, dear,” The old lady called him, shocking Ichigo out of his thoughts. “Come eat your breakfast; you look like you need it.”

More surprised than he was to find a little old lady in his dorm, he was shocked to learn she knew his name. Cautiously he made his way over to the table; Ichigo doing his best to look like he hadn’t got completely hammered the night before, before taking a seat on the only available chair. The old woman placed a plate in front of him; two fried eggs, plenty of bacon, a fried tomato and a small pile of little fried mushrooms, with toast on the side.

“I had to get it from the café down the road, since there is no stove here, but it should taste fine just the same,” The woman informed him.

Ichigo thanked her quietly; still unsure as to who she was, before digging in to his breakfast. He almost moaned at the taste; this was exactly what he needed this morning.

“I’m Toshiro’s grandmother, by the way,” The lady continued, “but you can call me ‘Granny’, Ichigo dear.”

Ichigo glanced up at her. Other than size, the woman held little resemblance to her grandson. Her eyes were grey in colour, her face rounder with well-defined cheek bones. Her nose was a different shape, and although her hair had gone grey, he could see some dark brown streaks through it. Actually, she looked a little like her other grandchild, Momo, but not a lot like Toshiro.

Toshiro hadn’t mentioned she’d be coming over today. Ichigo blushed, only imagining what he must have looked like, or worse, smelt like. The dorm was a bit of a mess too, since he’d started his celebration here with Shuuhei before heading over to Renji and Chad’s. Also, by the looks of things, he’d made a bit of a mess when he’d arrived home with Toshiro; the prodigy himself either too drunk or too tired to clean it up.

“I’m sorry the place is such a mess, Granny,” Ichigo apologised, liking the way ‘Granny’ rolled off his tongue. “I would have cleaned up if I had known you were coming…”

Toshiro snorted and earnt himself a quick smack to the back of his head from his grandmother.

“Nonsense, dear,” Granny responded in a strict tone. “Toshiro didn’t know I was coming either, otherwise I wouldn’t be sitting at a table with three hungover college students, one of which is still underage.”

Ichigo, Toshiro and Rangiku cringed in unison. This was not the best first impression Ichigo had ever made.

“Sorry,” All three of them mumbled.

“You’re forgiven,” Granny sighed, brushing a stray lock of hair out of her grandson’s eyes. “Toshiro tells me it was your birthday yesterday, Ichigo?”

“Yes, Granny,” Ichigo replied with a smile. Granny came across as the type of grandmother that could never stay mad at her grandkids for long; the type that took care of her family no matter how badly they fucked up. Ichigo didn’t really have any grandparents; his father’s parents had passed away many years before Ichigo was even born, and his mother’s lived on the other side of the country, and he was lucky if he saw them every third Christmas.

“Happy birthday, Dear,” Granny smiled at him, before handing him a plate of cookies. “These are my special birthday cookies, share them with your friends.”

Ichigo blushed lightly as he accepted the plate of cookies and thanked her earnestly. Had Toshiro really told his grandmother that it was his birthday before she’d come to visit them? He must have, since these cookies were obviously home-made and the dorm didn’t have the appliances to make cookies here. Granny would have had to have made these at home first before bringing them here.

“Now Toshiro, if you’ve finished with your breakfast, you need to go rinse your plate, and then get your things together,” Granny ordered her grandson firmly. “and shower too. We have a long car ride ahead of us.”

“I told you I’d get the train so you wouldn’t have to drive, Granny,” Toshiro grumbled, getting to his feet and taking his plate over to the sink.

“No grandson of mine is going to get a train by himself for three hours.”

Ichigo smirked as he watched the interaction between Toshiro and his grandmother. Obviously Granny was the firm hand sort; she was still soft and caring when it called for it, but apparently she wasn’t afraid to use a bit of tough love in her disciplining. Toshiro rinsed his plate as asked, before wandering off to the bathroom for a shower.

“Rangiku dear, tell me how you’ve been,” Granny turn her attention to the strangely quiet, and obviously still extremely hungover Rangiku. “How are you coping without that Gin fellow?”

* * *

Ichigo felt a thousand times better now that he was showered and his stomach was filled with a substantial breakfast. As he re-entered the dorm after dressing, he found that Rangiku had left – apparently she hadn’t stayed here like he thought she had, but had been ordered here by Toshiro’s grandmother for a ‘decent breakfast and a lecture on not getting her grandson drunk’.

Toshiro was standing by the door with a large duffle bag thrown over his shoulder and a pile of books under his arm. Granny was collecting her handbag and keys from the kitchen bench.

“Leaving so soon?” Ichigo called, he was a little sad that it was going to be about a month until he saw his crush again when school resumed mid-August.

“We must beat the traffic unfortunately,” Granny quipped, coming over to hug him. She was little and frail, but her hugs were strong and loving. “I’ve written down my number for you. It’s on the fridge, should you ever need anything.”

“Thanks Granny,” Ichigo mumbled into her shoulder as he bent down to her level. He’d been so surprised at how easy she came to care for him, given that they’d met about an hour ago. “It was nice to meet you. Toshiro mentions you all the time.”

Ichigo smirked as he saw the young genius roll his eyes from his position at the door.

“He’s a good boy,” Granny smiled as she released Ichigo from the hug. “It’s nice to know he has good friends here.”

“I wouldn’t say that we’re-” Toshiro went to cut in with an irritated voice.

“Hush, Toshiro!”

Toshiro’s mouth snapped shut, but the scowl did not leave his face. Ichigo chuckled to himself; the boy could be as tough and independent as he wanted at school, but at the end of the day, his grandmother still ruled over him. _Such a Granny’s boy,_ Ichigo grinned, _but so adorable._

“Well, we best be off now, dear,” Granny said, turning to face her grandson, “Junrinan is a three hour drive from here.”

“Goodbye Granny,” Ichigo waved, “See you in a month, Toshiro!”

The prodigy growled and crossed his arms over his chest – well, as best he could with all those books – and threw him a half-hearted glare. Granny nudged him in the ribs, and the prodigy released an exasperated sigh and rolled his eyes.

“Goodbye, Kurosaki.”


	9. Returning the Favour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lately, Toshiro had been acting a little… off.

Lately, Toshiro had been acting a little… _off._

Ichigo didn’t realise at first. They’d only just started back at school a few days ago. Toshiro had been his usual snarky self, as far as Ichigo could tell, but perhaps a little colder than normal. When Ichigo had asked him about his holidays, the prodigy’s replies had consisted of one word answers in combination with the occasional shrug. His tone was emotionless and indifferent, like he had been on the very first day back in April. He wasn’t listening either, when Ichigo recounted the stories of his summer break, but was staring off into nothingness.

The first theory that Ichigo came up with was the possibility that the course-topping student was simply stressed with his workload, as it wouldn’t have been the first time. It had been the holidays but many professors had assigned work to be completed over the break, and there was the September exams coming up, so Toshiro potentially becoming overwhelmed with his study, and returning to work as well as karate and soccer, seemed to be a fairly logical explanation.

However, Ichigo – being as observant of his crush as he was – started to notice the boy slipping into trances half way through reading his text or writing a sentence; Toshiro would just stop, his eyes glazing over as he stared unseeingly at a bare wall or empty tea cup. If he’d been writing at the time, his pen would just hang limply in his loose grip. If Ichigo didn’t rouse him – through a physical shake of his arm or a nudge in the side because calling out never worked – the boy would sit like that for as long as fifteen minutes. Toshiro, when brought to attention, would shrug Ichigo off as if nothing had happened and get straight back to his work. After seeing Toshiro mentally slip away three times in under two hours last night, Ichigo began to question if study-related stress was the problem. He’d seen the white-haired genius stressing over his workload before, and usually when that happened, the boy would stay hunched over his study for hours, pen never leaving paper as he scribbled his notes furiously. When he was stressed like that, the boy worked faster and more efficiently than ever… But this Toshiro barely got any work done at all.

The second thought came to Ichigo’s mind less than a minute ago, and now he was evaluating whether the lack of contact between him and his crush had set their relationship development back a few steps. Rangiku had warned him; “ _He will pull away the second things begin to look bad.”_ Of course, to Ichigo, nothing bad had happened, but maybe to Toshiro, the time over the break had actually eroded Toshiro’s trust in him, since he was no longer around to promote their friendship. Ichigo was still figuring out how the kid genius’ mind worked, but so far he’d understood that Toshiro didn’t have many friends because he didn’t want many friends. Ichigo had somehow managed to breach the first few walls surrounding the boy’s heart, so perhaps over the holidays the walls had repaired themselves with Ichigo once again locked out.

Ichigo felt a heaviness in his chest. That couldn’t be the answer; he wouldn’t let it be the answer. He’d worked too fucking hard to get barred again.

It also didn’t really explain the spacing out Toshiro would do.

Releasing a sigh, Ichigo knew there was only one person at the university who might have some idea of what mind-sucking parasite Toshiro had lodged in his brain; _Rangiku._

He found her easy enough. She was lying on the grass in the quad, beach towel beneath her and large bug-eyed sunglasses hiding her eyes. She had a couple text books lying unopened beside her, but apparently the possibility of developing her tan outweighed her study.

“Rangiku,” He called, he couldn’t tell if she was awake or not with those glasses on.

“Ichigo,” She whined, swatting his leg as he stood over her. “You’re blocking my sun.”

Ichigo sighed, plopping down next to her. He crossed his legs and leaned back on his arms for support.

“Toshiro’s been acting strange lately,” He began, glancing up at the cloudless sky. “I don’t know what’s causing it.”

This news caught the strawberry blonde bombshell’s attention. She propped herself up onto her elbows before lifting a hand to pull down her sunglasses just enough so Ichigo could see her eyes. The icy blue irises were darker than normal – and not from her shadow. They were…confused, maybe, with hints of worry flickering deep within.

“I know,” She replied softly, “He won’t talk to me about it either.”

“But he tells you everything?” Ichigo questioned, his surprise obvious in his voice.

Rangiku nodded solemnly. “I know it’s serious when he’s reluctant to share. I’m worried, Ichigo.”

Her second sentence was a mere whisper, like she was too scared to say it out loud, as if announcing it made the situation more real.

“What do we do then?”

“We wait,” Rangiku gave a half-shrug. “There are three possibilities; One, we wait for a favourable moment and strike while his guard is down. Two, he gets worked up to the point he has a major breakdown and spills everything. Finally, and the least likely to happen, he comes to us willingly.”

Rangiku described their options like it was a military battle plan. Her tone held authority and control, getting immediately to the point without fucking around. She scared Ichigo sometimes; she could swap between carefree and relaxed to serious and back again in the blink of an eye.

“Well, if the third is unlikely, I’d rather not let him deteriorate until he has a breakdown,” Ichigo frowned. “What do you mean when you say ‘favourable moment’?”

“When his guard is down is the best time to pull information from him,” She answered like it was obvious. “I wait until I see him acting funny, such as slipping into trances in this case, and then confront him about. It usually takes tears on my part before he’ll open up. He doesn’t like people worrying about him.”

“So, you guilt him into talking?”

Rangiku nodded. “I know it sounds bad, but it’s the only way that works. He bottles his emotions up until he explodes and that is where is headed right now. The extra stress of school and his other commitments adds to it and then he snaps. It’s better he feels guilty for a minute in order to release his pain.”

“How many times have you done this?” Ichigo asked, incredulous. He was starting to get very worried about the mental state of his young roommate now; he shouldn’t be carrying the whole burden of whatever the issue was.

“Maybe twice,” Rangiku shrugged. “People think I’m a dumb blonde and my grades don’t help my case, but I’m good at reading people and I’m observant. I know how Toshiro works, just like he knows me too.”

Ichigo sighed; he still had much to learn about the seventeen year old prodigy. Quietly, he thanked Rangiku, promising to keep her updated if he notices anything that might be relevant to Toshiro’s strange behaviour, and making her promise to do the same. As he stood and turned away, Rangiku called out to him again.

“Keep building that trust, Ichigo,” She advised, returning to her sun tanning, “He needs you too.”

* * *

A few days after his chat with Rangiku, Ichigo received a text from her:

_‘Ichigo, meet me at the library after class.’_

It was a fairly ambiguous text, but Ichigo could safely assume that she wanted to meet to discuss the latest update in the – quote – “Disturbed prodigy saga”, which had been getting more and more severe as the days went on. Toshiro actually seemed to be doing better on Friday, he was responding in full sentences and didn’t seem to space out as often as he had been, although he refused to change his expression from a deep frown.

However, at some point over the weekend, he seemed to deteriorate drastically. He wasn’t even trying to study anymore; Toshiro would just sit and watch TV without paying attention to what was on. On Saturday night, Ichigo had come home to find the genius staring blankly at the television, which was on the infomercial channel, displaying a half hour length advertisement about a robot vacuum. The boy wasn’t sleeping well either, with large purple bags developing under his eyes, and seemed to be almost completely oblivious to what was going on around him. He would have missed his morning class this morning if Ichigo hadn’t reminded him. He’d asked the prodigy straight out what the issue was, but Toshiro just replied softly that he was ‘fine’ and he didn’t know what Ichigo was talking about.

Rangiku had been attached to his hip at every possible minute, just waiting for the right moment to confront him, but so far her attempts had been unsuccessful. Toshiro must have caught on because he was now actively trying to avoid his best friend.

Ichigo sighed; he wished Toshiro could just come to him, or even just to Rangiku at this point, and share his troubles.

The lecturer rounded up his presentation and Ichigo slid out the back of the room before the crowd could intercept him. He weaved in between other students on his way to the library, many of his peers were suffering a severe case of Monday-itis, and many still looked hungover from their weekend parties. Ichigo eventually made it across campus to the massive building that was the KTU library. He found Rangiku sitting with Chad of all people in one of the small group study rooms.

“Hey,” Ichigo greeted them as he slipped into a chair next to Chad.

Chad nodded silently in return, and Rangiku – who was actually on the phone – gave him a small wave before quickly rounding up her conversation with whoever was on the other line.

“We’ve got a big problem, Ichigo,” Rangiku said softly as she hung up her phone and placed it on the desk in front of her. “One that we aren’t going to be able to fix.”

“What do you mean?” Ichigo asked, taking in the gloomy expression on her face and her watery eyes. “What had happened?”

“I know why Toshiro’s been so distracted lately,” She explained solemnly. “Granny called me this morning and told me everything; she’s worried about him too.”

Ichigo glanced briefly at Chad – whose expression was calm as always but his one visible eye was conveying obvious sadness – and wondered why he was here. As far as he knew, Chad and Rangiku had only ever met a couple of times, and his connection with Toshiro was no greater.

“She’s dying, Ichigo,” Rangiku stated, her voice rising in pitch.

Ichigo snapped his head back to look at her. “What?!”

“Granny’s cancer came back,” She answered, pulling a tissue out of her bag to dap her eyes with. “She was diagnosed a few years ago but she had been in remission for over a year, and now it’s back. Toshiro never told me.”

Pain ripped through Ichigo’s chest. It felt like someone had run him through the heart with a sword or large chef’s knife. His ears started to ring, and he could no longer hear the background chatter of happy students studying just outside their room. He found his sight going blurry too. This couldn’t be happening; not Granny. Ichigo had met her once, but she was the most pure soul he’d ever come across and she had immediately took him in as if he was another grandchild of hers, despite the fact that he was hungover at the time.

“She seems to be pretty accepting of it,” Rangiku continued, “but Toshiro is not handling it. Apparently, he had a panic attack when he was talking to her on the phone a few days ago.”

Well, that would explain his strange behaviour lately and the rapid deterioration over the weekend. He keeps spacing out because he can’t focus on anything else, he can’t sleep because it’s all he is thinking about. Ichigo pinched the bridge of his nose, and exhaled heavily. Rangiku was right, they couldn’t fix this. Sure they could try and comfort the boy and get him to open up about his feelings, but they couldn’t save his grandmother from cancer.

“And the doctors have ruled that she is definitely dying?” Ichigo asked, still not fully accepting the news.

Rangiku nodded, releasing a shaky breath. “She’s too old to respond to the treatments, and they can’t keep putting her through the chemotherapy. They’ve said she’s got about three months left, maybe four or five at best.”

Ichigo held his head in his hands as he leant on the study desk. _Poor Toshiro,_ the boy must be devastated right now; Granny means the absolute world to him. He even lives with her! How is he going to get through this? Not alone, that’s for certain; Ichigo was not going to let him suffer on his own. Another thought hit Ichigo as forcefully as a speeding semi-trailer.

“Wait,” Ichigo snapped his head back up to look hard at Rangiku. “Toshiro lives with her, right? What will happen to him? Does he have parents?”

Toshiro had only ever mentioned two family members; Granny and Momo.

“No, he doesn’t have parents,” Rangiku grimaced. “Granny is his legal guardian; he doesn’t have anyone else.”

Ichigo sighed. Chad fidgeted beside him, and Ichigo could tell he was uncomfortable; this situation hitting way too close to home for the burly Mexican.

“Where will he go then?” Ichigo questioned, his heart sinking further. “He’s only seventeen.”

“Momo is old enough to become his guardian but Toshiro would hate that,” Rangiku answered with a sigh. “That leaves two options: A – Toshiro moves overseas to live with Momo’s parents, who he isn’t very close with, or B – foster care.”

Her voice was low when she revealed the second option, and Chad visibly flinched. He’d suffered in foster care, ending up in a number of unsafe homes with less than ideal foster parents. Ichigo felt his heart stop beating for a second; Toshiro couldn’t end up in either of those situations. State care was a definite no and Ichigo knew that the prodigy would definitely not want to move overseas, especially to live with people he wasn’t completely comfortable around.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Rangiku continued, more serious than he’d ever known her. “Chad here is helping me create a third option.”

Chad was studying social welfare and with his own personal experiences, the large Latino would have a pretty good understanding about the legislation in regards to the care of a minor.

“What’s the new option?” Ichigo asked, knowing that any new possibility couldn’t be worse than the ones already in place.

“I’ll take him,” Rangiku announced evenly. “I want to be his guardian.”

Ichigo’s eyes bulged out of his head, “You?!”

Rangiku nodded assertively. Ichigo’s jaw dropped. Sure, Rangiku would look after the boy well enough, since she already cared so much for him, but she was irresponsible and lazy and a huge party girl, there was very little chance she could actually care for a young teenager. There is a huge difference between being best friends and being someone’s carer.

“Is that even legal?” Ichigo asked disbelievingly, turning to Chad for answers.

“Rangiku is technically old enough to do it,” Chad replied, clearing his throat, “but the Family Court will be a little hesitant. If she can get a higher-paying job, keep her school and criminal records clear of incidents, and maybe even find her own place to live, a judge will be more willing to allow it, especially since Hitsugaya is already so self-sufficient on his own.”

“Chad also said that it would be a huge advantage to have the previous guardian’s recommendation,” Rangiku chimed in. “I just spoke to Granny on the phone and she approves. She knows Toshiro doesn’t trust anyone else.”

“Granny wants you to be Toshiro’s new guardian?” Ichigo asked, still not quite convinced.

She shrugged, “It’s better than the other scenarios.”

“But, Ran-” Ichigo said. “This is a huge commitment. Toshiro will be your responsibility until he is twenty. That’s another three years away. Are you sure you want to do that?”

Rangiku nodded confidently. “He’s my best friend, Ichigo, and he is like my brother. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep him safe and happy. Besides, he’s so mature anyway, as long as he doesn’t get into trouble for anything, it will just be like living with a friend…who I occasionally have to sign permission slips for…”

“And financially?”

Chad answered this one, “Rangiku will be able to claim welfare payments to support him. Also I understand that Hitsugaya’s tuition is covered by the school, so there is one less burden.”

“Plus, he has a job,” Rangiku smiled. “He already pays for most of his own things.”

Ichigo sighed. He had to agree that this was the best of the three options. Granny approving was probably the tide turner for him; there was no way that the old woman would put her grandson in harm’s way, and if she trusted Rangiku to support Toshiro, then Ichigo had to have faith that it was the best decision. He also knew that Toshiro would probably be the happiest with this option and that was all her cared about in the end.

He and Rangiku both agreed to keep it to themselves for now, firmly believing that last thing Toshiro would want to hear right now was who was going to replace his grandmother, only weeks after finding out she was dying. They spent another hour in the library as Chad took them through the basic process, and gave Rangiku a list of tips to help her case in front of the Family Court. Both males in the room promised to do their best to help her in any way they could. Afterwards, they packed up their bags and Rangiku and Ichigo headed back to the dorm; it was time to put their comforting skills to the test.

On the way there Rangiku gave Ichigo a full run down of the comforting process for Toshiro. Ichigo found it fascinating how both Rangiku and Toshiro had elaborate but strict routines when it came to consoling each other. He recalled that afternoon when Rangiku had turned up at their door, crying because her boyfriend had cheated on her, and Toshiro had immediately sought out the items he required to comfort her – which had included tissues, ice cream and sake – like he’d done it 100 times over, which he almost had apparently. Rangiku explained that she had only really needed to comfort him once or twice, so her knowledge was not as fully developed as his was for her, but she told Ichigo what she knew anyway.

“When he is sad, he gets thirsty, but only for water, so we will need to get a large bottle for him, preferably with a pop-top lid. I’ve never seen him cry, but if he does, he will fall asleep straight afterwards, even if he was wide awake beforehand…or at least, that’s what Momo told me. Running your fingers through his hair will calm him instantly and same goes for lightly scratching his back. Lastly, he’d rather die than admit it, but I know he likes to be cuddled.”

“Cuddled?”

_“Cuddled.”_

The two of them entered the dorm and were met with silence. Toshiro’s backpack was sitting on the kitchen table but the prodigy was nowhere to be seen. Rangiku crept quietly across the floor to the boy’s bedroom door. Peaking in, Rangiku turned back to Ichigo and nodded at him to follow her. He collected a bottle of water from the fridge – as they had close to ten bottles already in there – and met her by the door.

Toshiro was passed out on top of his sheets, half dressed for soccer training with his soccer shorts and socks on, but still clad in his regular t-shirt. He had obviously been so tired that he couldn’t even finish changing before falling asleep. Ichigo’s eyes softened at the sight, before he soundlessly pulled his phone out of his pocket and text Karin to tell her Toshiro wouldn’t be making it to training that night, saying that the boy had fallen ill. Rangiku climbed onto the bed, pulling the covers out from under the sleeping boy and then settling herself down next to him, and wrapping her arms around his waist. She gestured for Ichigo to join them, and so he did. Ichigo laid down on Toshiro’s other side and pulled the blankets back up over the three of them, while inaudibly praying that Toshiro trusted him enough to not freak out when woke up to find a strawberry in his bed.

The boy in question stirred, awoken by the shuffling about and arms encircling him, and mumbled incoherently as he regained consciousness. He’d been facing Ichigo with Rangiku spooning him from behind, and confusion was the first expression to pass over those striking teal eyes as they began to focus on Ichigo.

“Kurosaki?” Toshiro mumbled, lifting his arm to poke Ichigo in the cheek.

Ichigo fought back a smile; Toshiro was cutest when he was tired and confused. He tended to have peculiar habits when he was only semi-conscious, and also when he was drunk, which generally included playing mindlessly with whatever he could get his hands on, which was why the boy was currently tugging softly on his shirt. Well, at least he hadn’t thrown a fit or panicked…yet.

Toshiro eventually became aware of Rangiku behind him, as she slowly dragged her fingers through his hair. He rolled on to his back to look at her.

“Rangiku?” He asked, awareness becoming apparent. “Why are you in my bed? Why is Kurosaki in my bed?”

Toshiro was showing the first signs of panic as he looked between them rapidly, and fidgeted, trying to sit up. Rangiku pulled him closer and continued to drag her fingers through his hair patiently. Ichigo was surprised to see her theory was correct as the boy ceased his struggles almost straight away. He was obviously still quite alarmed to have two people in his bed, but he was fairly calm about it, throwing a half-hearted glare at Rangiku and waiting silently for an explanation.

“Granny called me, Toshiro,” She explained to him. “She told me everything.”

Ichigo’s heart cracked as he watched Toshiro’s face screw up in horror.

“It’s not true,” Toshiro’s voice shook. “They’ve made a mistake.”

Rangiku said nothing but held the boy closer as he resumed his previous struggles. Remembering the bottle of water, Ichigo pushed it firmly into Toshiro’s grasp. The white-haired beauty took it without question, popped the cap and drank it like his life depended on it. Rangiku had been right about that too. Ichigo figured that he must prefer to pop-top as opposed to a screw cap as he watched Toshiro drink it while lying down. The bottle was just over half-full when he stopped, clicked the cap back down and clutched it to his chest. Toshiro’s breaths were becoming rapid and short, and Ichigo could tell he was on the verge of having another panic attack.

Not sure what else to do, since Rangiku’s hand in his hair was only doing so much, Ichigo shuffled closer and threw an arm over Toshiro. There was a good chance he was over-stepping his boundary with this move, but he had to calm Toshiro down quickly, and this was the only thought coming to mind. Toshiro tensed at the contact but otherwise said nothing, his panic still growing steadily.

“Do you remember when I was sick, Toshiro?” Ichigo asked softly. “I was sad that night, and I got you to tell me a happy story. It really helped me, so now I’ll tell you one.”

Again, Toshiro remained silent, blinking owlishly at him. He probably hadn’t noticed, but Ichigo could see that his breathing was starting to plateau, which was the first step in turning him back away from the anxiety.

“When I was maybe four or five, my parents got me a toy doctor set for my birthday. It was the greatest thing ever. It came with a bag and had a plastic stethoscope, reflex hammer, sphygmomanometer, otoscope…it even came with a small lab coat and face mask,” Ichigo recounted, noting that Toshiro had shifted slightly to face him. “My mum would pretend to be my patient, and let me check over the girls too. They were babies at the time, so when I told Yuzu she had bad reflexes, she started crying…”

Toshiro raised an eyebrow, but his breathing had steadied, and his entire focus was on Ichigo. Ichigo stifled a laugh at the boy’s expression, and subtly used the distraction to run his finger nails lightly over the boy’s clothed back; if the young genius noticed, he didn’t comment, but Ichigo believed he was probably too wrapped up in his story to realise what was happening. Rangiku had propped herself up on an elbow, her other hand still combing through Toshiro’s hair, she too listening to the story.

“Yeah, I felt really bad for making her upset, so I wrote her a fake prescription for ‘reflex medicine’,” Ichigo continued. “When my dad saw how much I loved playing doctor, he’d let me come in and pretend to treat some of his patients, so long as they didn’t mind… I’ve wanted to be a doctor ever since.”

Toshiro had been slowly sipping on his water throughout the story, no longer panicked but still terribly sad. Ichigo continued to scratch his back and Rangiku had sunk back down to hold him. Eventually the boy did speak up, his voice was strained and his eye’s turned glassy.

“How did you cope when your mother passed away?”

It was so soft, Ichigo almost missed it.

“I didn’t… not at first anyway,” Ichigo answered honestly. “I tried to deal with it alone, but I just ended up hurting my family. In the end, my father taught me that I needed to talk about my feelings with the people I love, so that we can get through it together.”

Toshiro nodded slowly, frowning as he thought to himself. Ichigo could see the tears coming before Toshiro quickly clenched his eyes shut and rolled over to face Rangiku, burying himself in her chest. His body shook a little but no sounds were made. Rangiku buried her nose into his hair as she held him tighter, and Ichigo shuffled a little closer to continue his ministrations to Toshiro’s back. Rangiku was right about the cuddling thing too, apparently.

“I don’t want Granny to leave,” The boy croaked pathetically.

“She doesn’t want to leave you either,” Rangiku whispered, “but whatever happens, Ichigo and I are going to be with you the whole time, I promise.”

Toshiro didn’t reply, and Ichigo didn’t expect him to. Rangiku was right, they were not going to leave him; they’d be by his side for the whole thing. Ichigo knew how it felt to lose the person you love most in this world, and he hated that Toshiro was now going through the same thing, but slower.

At some point, the seventeen year old college student fell asleep; his breathing deep and even, his body limp in Rangiku’s arms. Ichigo and Rangiku shared a look; they would do whatever it takes to look after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays, everyone!


	10. Boys' Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro is tired and loopy, Ichigo is concerned and caring - banter ensues.

Toshiro frowned as he watched Ichigo flitter around the dorm, preparing the room for his “boys’ night” with Renji Abarai, Shuuhei Hisagi, Izuru Kira, Ikkaku Madarame, Yumichika Ayasegawa and Chad. _Chad…_ It annoyed Toshiro beyond belief that nobody seemed to know the gentle giant’s last name, everyone telling him that the man’s name was simply ‘Chad’ and that was all there was too it. Toshiro was uncomfortable calling people by their first names out loud – besides family, Rangiku, and on the odd occasion, Ichigo – as it seemed to promote some sort of familiarity, and that usually caused people to want to befriend him.

He didn’t like making friends.

As Ichigo moved the coffee table from in front of the couch and placed numerous blankets and pillows on the floor, Toshiro had to wonder about his relationship with Ichigo. He had taken a long time to come to the conclusion that they were, in fact, friends, and begrudgingly, he had to admit he was rather glad to have the strawberry’s enthusiastic company. Ichigo had been utterly amazing lately, with all Toshiro had going on. Ichigo and Rangiku; Toshiro honestly didn’t know what state he’d be in now if they hadn’t been so damn persistent about comforting him since they’d found out the news.

He didn’t like to think about it, and for the most part, he didn’t have to. He was usually pretty good during the week while he was busy with his university studies, as well as his work, soccer and karate. He’d even started tutoring the Kurosaki girls and Jinta after soccer training and volunteered to help Ikkaku teach his junior classes on Saturday afternoons. The bald fighter had recently taken up a job at the Karakura Town Junior Karate Club as a weekend instructor, and although he was a brilliant fighter and teacher to other college students, little kids were out of his comfort zone. The kids seemed to react better to Toshiro, perhaps because of the closer age and height gap or maybe just because he had hair. Either way, it meant that he was busy all day Monday to Saturday, from as early as 7am to as late 10pm on some nights, and then come Sunday, all he would do is sleep or study.

Saturday nights were the hardest; he’d finish helping Ikkaku around 6pm and then he’d call Granny to check up on her. He swore that as the weeks went on, she sounded frailer and weaker each time she answered his calls. Every conversation was the same, she would insist that she was okay and ‘feeling better this week’, and every time she would deny him permission to come home and take care of her. She wouldn’t let him take time off school or put any _unnecessary_ strains on his currently perfect academic record. Still at home, Granny had a nurse staying with her, providing around the clock care and driving her to her doctor’s appointments at the hospital, but Toshiro wanted to be there himself; he didn’t want her to be without family. Granny always coughed when she was on the phone, and they always sounded wet which usually meant she was coughing up blood. When Toshiro would eventually hang up the phone, he felt like there was a heavy anchor in his chest, slowly but surely sinking his heart into his stomach. He felt like someone had put a choker collar around his neck and was gradually pulling it tighter.

Toshiro now only made the call when he was safely behind his bedroom door, but with either Ichigo or Rangiku or both somewhere else in the dorm room. Ichigo had caught on to his behavioural patterns quickly and now at 7:30pm every Saturday night, Ichigo would enter his bedroom with a cup of lavender tea – the strawberry had actually googled ‘calming teas’ – and an oversized bottle of chilled water. Toshiro would gratefully accept the gifts and Ichigo would usually hang around until he was sure the prodigy was feeling better, or at least, until his hands stopped shaking and he could hold his tea properly. The two of them would later sit down and watch a movie together. Toshiro found out that his roommate’s favourite type of movies were the superhero variety, which he didn’t mind himself – seriously, who could resist Chris Hemsworth as Thor? – And it was a major step up from those ridiculous sappy chick flicks Rangiku liked to bore him with.

“Okay, I think we’re ready!” Ichigo suddenly exclaimed from the middle of living room.

Apparently the orange-haired male had finished setting up for his boys’ night. With all the cushions and blankets lying in front of the TV, it actually looked pretty inviting, although strikingly similar to Rangiku’s girls’ nights. He shuddered at the memory; at least at this one, he probably wasn’t going to have to paint anyone’s nails.

“Remind me again,” Toshiro commented from his place at the kitchen table. “What are you doing tonight?”

“Boys’ night!” Ichigo chirped happily. “A couple of beers, a bit of poker and then a marathon of the Avengers movies…”

Toshiro frowned, he wasn’t sure if you could call two films a marathon but he didn’t want to burst his roommate’s bubble.

“You know, you could join us…” Ichigo smiled cheekily at him. “We don’t bite.”

“Ayasegawa does after a couple drinks…” Toshiro muttered, “and I wouldn’t put it passed Madarame.”

“Well I suppose they’re perfect for each other then,” Ichigo smirked. “Come on, Toshiro, we just got the new Avengers DVD and I know you want to watch it too! It will be fun.”

Toshiro frowned. Today was Sunday, so he had no commitments and he’d already spent most of the day asleep. Now he was awake – although he still felt exhausted and like he hadn’t slept at all – and was without an excuse to not participate. He felt uncomfortable though, as he usually did in these sorts of situations. He knew all of Ichigo’s friends and they all knew him, but he wasn’t very comfortable around them– not even Izuru who was dating his cousin, or Renji and Ikkaku who he did karate with. It was his own fault really; he wasn’t comfortable around most people.

“I think I’m just going to study in my room,” Toshiro sighed, packing his notes up in preparation to move into the bedroom.

“All your spare time is spent studying these days,” Ichigo frowned. “You need to take a break.”

“I slept until lunch time today,” Toshiro argued. “I think that was a big enough break.”

“Only because you were so exhausted from the rest of the week,” Ichigo retorted. “And you’ve been studying for 5 hours straight now. Please, Toshiro, take a break, do something fun.”

Toshiro glanced up and raised an eyebrow at Ichigo, who mirrored his expression perfectly. They did this often; each challenging the other to step down. Toshiro usually ended up admitting defeat – unless he was super desperate to get his own way – because Ichigo was bloody stubborn, and Toshiro was, as painful for him as it was to confess, a bit of a sucker for those imploring puppy dog eyes.

“I will study for a while,” Toshiro compromised, pushing his thick rimmed reading glasses further up his nose, “and then join you for the movie.”

“Both movies?”

“The second one only.”

“No, you need a bigger break,” Ichigo crossed his arms like he actually had authority in this situation; “You may sit out the first film, but join us for dinner, poker and _The Age of Ultron_.”

“Counter proposal,” Toshiro stood straight and folded his arms over his chest as well. “I’ll eat dinner with you guys – provided it’s in the dorm, not the dining hall – skip poker, and then return for the second movie.”

“What do you have against poker?” Ichigo questioned. “We don’t bet real money or anything…”

“Well, obviously I’m really good at it,” Toshiro shrugged with an arrogant smirk, “and I wouldn’t want to embarrass you in front of your friends.”

Ichigo scoffed, taking a few steps closer to Toshiro, “I highly doubt that; you’re good at a lot of things, Toshiro, but poker is an adult’s game and, well, you know…”

Toshiro gave a mock laugh and quickly bridged the gap between them, grabbing a fist full of the idiot’s shirt collar and pulling him down to his eye level. The strawberry’s eyes were wide with shock, obviously not expecting the aggressive move, and he swallowed hard. Toshiro had to smirk at that stupid expression on his face; like he was actually going to hurt the fool.

“Let’s play for it then,” He hissed, somewhere between playful and annoyed but strikingly dangerous. “Right here, right now. You win, and I’ll take the whole night off. I win, and I go back to studying – taking breaks only if I want them.”

Ichigo’s shocked expression turned cheeky, as his eye’s gleamed sinisterly, “You’re on.”

Toshiro released his roommate’s shirt and Ichigo scrambled off to find some playing cards. He returned a second later, as Toshiro finished packing up his study notes and putting them in the bedroom; he’d be coming back for them in a minute.

“Basic Draw Poker,” Ichigo announced, “I’ll give you five cards, and you may trade three for new cards or four if you have an Ace. Good?”

“Excellent.”

About ten minutes later, Toshiro sat staring blankly at Ichigo as he stared back at him with an equally emotionless expression; it was actually probably the first time he’d ever seen that strawberry face look so impassive. It seemed as if they were finally going to play; the first few rounds had never gone anywhere since each time one of them had folded. There was a lot on the line tonight, Toshiro believed, and he wasn’t going to risk it with a low hand.

“You ready, Kurosaki?” He smirked.

“Sure am, Hitsugaya, get ready to spend all night with the boys.”

“Finally calling me by my last name, miracles do happen.”

Ichigo grinned manically before flipping over his cards, and spreading them in front of Toshiro. He waved a hand in front of them, like one of those presenter ladies on game shows.

“Full house,” He announced triumphantly. “Beat that, Prodigy!”

Toshiro squinted down at the cards with a frown. Full house indeed; three ten’s and two Kings. He glanced back at his own hand briefly before flicking his eyes back up to a smirking strawberry. _That idiot._

Toshiro sighed and flipped his own cards over.

“Four of a kind,” He stated dryly. “Sorry not sorry, Kurosaki, but you better keep practising.”

Ichigo stared down at Toshiro’s cards dumbly as he comprehended what had just occurred. Toshiro himself got to his feet, and marched over to his bedroom door.

“Make sure you boys aren’t too loud tonight, okay?” He called over his shoulder and flashing Ichigo a wicked grin. “I’ve got a lot of study to get through.”

Toshiro had barely closed his door behind him when he heard the frustrated and indignant roar of his roommate.

“FUCKING PRODIGY!”

* * *

Ichigo’s friends had been arriving over the last half hour or so, as Toshiro could hear through the thin walls. He could hear Ikkaku and Yumichika bickering over stupid topics and then they’d go silent, and he’d hear Renji call across the room, telling them to “Get a room if you wanna fuck.” Toshiro just prayed they didn’t try come in his room. They all seemed to know he was in here though, given that Ichigo was still sulking about losing poker and was grumbling to whoever would listen. Toshiro also knew that Chad was in the dorm, but only because Ichigo had greeted him in a loud, rather enthusiastic voice, but the shy Mexican had not said much since.

Another knock on the main door, and Toshiro heard Shuuhei and Izuru arrive; that was everyone accounted for. Toshiro returned his concentration to his astronomy readings; he couldn’t have cared less about what crude jokes Shuuhei was telling or what loud mouth comments Renji had up his sleeve. His attention was brought back to the visitors about ten minutes later, however, when he heard Izuru mention his name.

“How is Hitsugaya coping with the news?”

Toshiro cursed under his breath; he’d forgotten that Izuru knew about his grandmother’s illness, he was dating Momo after all. He’d actually called Momo when school had returned to see if she was okay – they had their issues, but they shared a grandmother and Toshiro still cared for her deeply – since he hadn’t seen her around campus yet. She had started crying on the phone and he could hear Izuru in the background trying to sooth her. Momo had probably known for about a week at this point, as Granny had called her and her parents a couple days after she and Toshiro had spent that horrible afternoon at the hospital getting her test results. It kind of stung that Momo hadn’t tried to call him first, but he was used to it by now; she’d simply forgotten since she was so wrapped up in her own suffering. Toshiro couldn’t really blame her though, since it’d taken him close to ten days to pick up the phone.

“He’s okay, I guess,” Ichigo answered. “He keeps himself busy so he doesn’t have to think about it much.”

Toshiro raised an eye brow at his roommate’s response. He was grateful that Ichigo had been rather vague about that; the last thing he needed people knowing about was his panic attacks or that night Ichigo and Rangiku had spent holding him in bed while he fought back tears. The strawberry was a gem; Toshiro gave himself a half-smile, Ichigo would never sell him out like that.

“Momo is heartbroken,” Izuru stated, voice solemn. “It’s terribly sad. Granny was such a lovely woman.”

Granny _is_ such a lovely woman, Toshiro clenched his jaw; _she’s not dead yet._

“Oh, she’s the best,” Ichigo agreed. “They are lucky to have her.”

 _So lucky,_ Toshiro nodded to himself, pleased at the strawberry’s use of the present tense. That seemed to end the conversation as Ichigo herded them towards the TV and soon after, Toshiro heard the Avenger’s theme playing as the guys shuffled about, presumably getting comfortable. Sighing, Toshiro turned to his laptop to play some of his own music softly – as not to be heard through the walls – and returned to his study. He put his readings aside, and moved on to the written work that required more concentration on his part.

* * *

“Come on, Toshiro,” Ichigo’s soft voice called out to him from somewhere above. “Wake up.”

Toshiro opened his eyes and frowned; why was everything on his desk so close to his face? And blurry too?

“Up you get, Princess,” Ichigo shook his shoulder. “I’m putting you in bed; you can’t sleep at your desk.”

 _Sleep at his desk? Why would he do that?_ Toshiro’s frown deepened as his muggy thoughts tried to sort themselves out. _Did Ichigo just call him a ‘princess’?_ He blinked a few times before he realised that his head was resting upon his curled up arm, which lay atop his maths textbook. His glasses were hanging loosely at the tip of his nose, explaining his previous questions. His music still played quietly in the background, barely audible over the sounds of Ichigo’s friends; apparently they were still here.

He was vaguely aware of something warm rubbing his back in a circular fashion before he remembered the strawberry standing over him. Pushing himself up slowly, Toshiro found his other hand fiddling idly with the fingers on Ichigo’s free hand; alternating between tugging them gently and stroking them like he would pet a cat or something. He didn’t know why he did stuff like that, his hands just sort of moved without his conscious permission. Ichigo didn’t seem to mind, chuckling softly; he was probably used to it by now. Toshiro sluggishly pulled his hand back and mumbled something akin to an apology.

“Come on, you’re exhausted,” Ichigo continued as the warmth left Toshiro’s back. “You need to go to bed.”

“No,” Toshiro slurred tiredly, stretching out his arms and back. “M’ study now.”

Ichigo released an exasperated sigh, and leaned over Toshiro to reach his laptop; saving the work and shutting it down. Toshiro watched him stupidly, making weak protests. He quickly grabbed a hold of his textbook and clutched it to his chest before Ichigo could take it from him. The strawberry tried to pry it from his grasp, but Toshiro held on tightly; he still wasn’t completely mentally aware, but he knew he wanted to keep his book to study with. His mind would catch up soon; he just hoped he wouldn’t lose his book before then.

“Toshiro,” Ichigo warned sternly and suspiciously similar to the way Granny would. “I’m not letting you study anymore tonight.”

Toshiro tightened his grasp around his textbook and pouted up at his roommate. He didn’t want to go to bed now; it was only…actually he didn’t know what time it was since his glasses had now fallen off and he couldn’t read the time on his alarm clock.

“No,” He whined, yawning a little and twisting away from Ichigo’s meddlesome hands.

The 19 year old sighed again, and ceased his attempts to remove Toshiro’s prize. The hand that had been rubbing his back previously returned to its job.

“You have two options, Toshiro,” He spoke calmly. “Put the book down and go to bed, or you can come out with me and watch the movie. It’s your choice.”

“The second one?” Toshiro asked sluggishly, weighing up his options and ignoring the voice in the back of his mind that was suggesting he wack his roommate over the head with his book and return to studying. He was aware that he was brain was slow upon first waking up as it always was, but he felt slower than usual tonight. He felt like he was drunk, but doing his best to appear sober in front of an adult.

“The second one,” Ichigo confirmed with a small smile and an encouraging nod.

“Oki,” Toshiro murmured with a small frown, _what was he agreeing to again?_

Ichigo helped Toshiro to his feet, holding him up tentatively while he swayed on the spot, before turning to grab the spare blanket of the end of his bed; the blue one Granny knitted for him when he was a child.

“Let’s go,” Ichigo gestured towards the door, and then he frowned at the book still in Toshiro’s grasp. “Give me that.”

Toshiro looked down at the book; he’d forgotten that he was still holding it.

“No,” He grumbled. “It’s mine, get your own.”

And with that, he stormed passed Ichigo into the main room, but not before catching a glimpse of a smirk on his idiot roommate’s face. The bright lights blinded him for a second as he left the considerably darker bedroom and stepped under the threshold into the shared space. Ichigo’s friends were gathered around the kitchen table; pizza, playing cards and poker chips scattered across the surface.

They greeted him with enthusiastic hellos and wild hand gestures. He wasn’t sure if they were drunk, or just excited to see him, or perhaps he was imagining the whole thing. He still didn’t feel like he was awake – kind of like he was dreaming. He waved dumbly in return.

“Are you okay, kid?” Probably Ikkaku – since he was usually the only one brave enough to call him that – asked.

“He’s fine,” Ichigo appeared beside him, putting a hand on his shoulder. “He just gets a little loopy when he’s tired. He’s going to watch the movie with us.”

“Sweet,” Renji hollered with a mouth full of pizza. “I never got to see it at the cinemas.”

Ichigo led Toshiro to the middle of the couch before turning to the TV. The other guys came and sat down on their various spots on the floor, except Chad who sat on the couch on Toshiro’s left. Turning to face the large Latino, Toshiro prodded his cheek gently.

“What’s your real name?” He asked bluntly. Apparently, his mind wasn’t coming back to him anytime soon and now he was going to over step his boundaries and poke people’s faces.

“Yasutora Sado,” the Mexican answered softly.

“Sado,” Toshiro echoed the surname, pleased with the information.

Ichigo plopped himself down on Toshiro’s other side with a fresh beer and began adjusting his own blanket before Toshiro turned on him and flicked his nose. Ichigo glared half-heartedly at him, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

“I told you ‘Chad’ wasn’t his real name,” Toshiro muttered.

Ichigo sighed again – he sure did sigh a lot – and Toshiro grinned at him.

“Normally you only act strange for a few minutes after waking up,” Ichigo grumbled. “Obviously, you’re so exhausted now that you’re still not with it after fifteen minutes.”

Toshiro was mildly aware of the confused looks he was getting from Ichigo’s guests, and the odd chuckle throughout the room. Ignoring it, he dropped his textbook to his lap and opened it, flicking absently though the pages looking for pictures. He didn’t want to tell Ichigo that he was right, but he did feel extremely tired.

A second later, Ichigo was pushing a mug of tea under his nose.

“It should have cooled down enough for you to drink it now,” Ichigo murmured softly, placing the mug into Toshiro’s small hands.

The prodigy took it with an appreciative smile in his roommate’s direction, and sipped quietly on the warm beverage. Camomile with honey; his favourite night time beverage. It tended to make him sleepy though, which might just have been Ichigo’s aim.

Someone flicked off the lights, and Ichigo used the remote to start the movie. Toshiro’s mind was now back in action, for the most part, and he was glad to have the darkness of the room to hide his blush as he recalled all the dopey things he’d said and done since Ichigo had woken him up. _Oh god, he’d acted like a child…and he’d done in front of people._

_He had actually poked Chad’s face…Yasutora Sado’s face._

Ichigo would be fairly accustomed to his odd behaviour when tired by now, but still, it was highly embarrassing. He still had his textbook in his lap after all this time, for God’s sake.

Looking around the room, everyone was deeply engrossed by the film. Toshiro and Ichigo had seen it at the movies a few months ago, with Rangiku who had the hots for Captain America and Ichigo’s best friend from high school, Tatsuki – a black belt like Toshiro – who was a lesbian in love with Scarlet Johansson. Ichigo seemed to be the only one there for the storyline, while the rest of them were just there for the eye-candy.

As if reading his mind, Ichigo nudged Toshiro’s side suggestively at the first shot of Thor.

“There’s your boyfriend,” Ichigo whispered, loud enough for only him to hear. Maybe Ichigo had a few beers at this point; it’d probably explain why he was so tolerant towards Toshiro’s nonsense this evening.

“Please, we all know how you feel about Hawkeye,” Toshiro retorted.

“Nah, I’m more into Iron Man,” the strawberry grinned. “I love a smart-mouth genius.”

Toshiro punched his arm, ignoring the chuckle from Ichigo. Sometimes he wondered if the strawberry had feelings for him, or if he was just naturally flirty. He was betting on the latter; there was no way Ichigo would fall for a guy like him. The man probably saw him as a little brother, if anything, since he was actually younger than his baby sisters.

As he glanced over at Ikkaku, who was spooning Yumichika and nuzzling his nose into the feminine man’s ebony locks, Toshiro couldn’t help but feel a little sad. Sometimes he wanted a boyfriend; someone to lie in bed with all day, or just to snuggle with while they watched movies. He frowned at the ‘snuggle’ reference but, as lame as it was, that’s what he wanted. Other times, however, he was reminded of what assholes people can be, and he remembers that he is better off alone.

He punched Ichigo in the arm again, almost causing him to spill his beer.

“Ouch,” He hissed. “What was that for?”

“That’s for calling me ‘princess’, you idiot,” Toshiro growled.

Toshiro could see Ichigo’s ridiculously white teeth as he smirked in the dark. He’d deserved that.

It was about half way through the movie when Toshiro felt the tiredness consume his body again and he started to lose the battle against his eye lids as he fought to stay awake. At some point, Ichigo had removed his thankfully now empty tea cup from his rapidly loosening grip and ensured his blanket was tucked around his legs. Every now and again, Toshiro would feel his head drop limply, so that his chin rested against the top of his chest, before he’d jolt awake again for another couple of minutes, only to repeat the process.

Eventually Toshiro felt a strong arm wrap around his shoulders and pull him against Ichigo’s chest. He was too exhausted to argue, and besides, it felt quite nice. The strawberry’s warm body and steady heartbeat was enough to lull Toshiro into a comfortable sleep, not to mention the protective hold the older male had on him.

The last thing Toshiro was conscious of was a wickedly mischievous voice from the ground below; the low baritone that could only have been Renji Abarai.

“Comfortable there, Strawberry?”


	11. Group Work [Interlude]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renji has been making some observations

“…This is a group assignment-”

A collective groan echoed around the large lecture hall. The lecturer, seemingly ignorant to the protest of his students, continued on without missing a beat.

“Each group is to be made up of no more or less than three students and each group will be assigned a topic-”

“Ugh…” grumbled Renji from his seat at the back of the hall. “Why do they keep doing this to us? Surely they know that nobody likes group work?”

“I don’t know,” Izuru sighed from Renji’s left, “but hopefully he’ll let us choose our groups this time…”

Renji let out another quiet groan as he slumped forward over his desk. The soft thud of his head hitting the small table was muffled somewhat by his open notebook. Indeed, he did hope the teacher would allow them to pick their own groups, because the only thing worse than a group assignment was a group assignment with people he didn’t know or like. The awkward library trips, the constant disagreements, relying on idiots to do their parts correctly; honestly, it was more trouble than it was worth. Picking the group himself wouldn’t be so terrible; at the very least, he’d still have Izuru.

“You have ten minutes to sort yourselves into groups. Once a group has been formed, send a representative down to collect your topics and record the names of each student in the group.”

Some students cheered at the idea of not being forced into a group of strangers, while most made a frantic grab for their closest friends as if they were about to disappear.

“Excellent,” Izuru clapped his hands together. “You and me, Renji.”

“We need a third…” Renji looked around the room eagerly. “Who don’t we hate?”

Izuru chucked quietly as he too looked around the room. “What about her? What’s her name again? Nema? Nemo?”

“Nemu,” corrected Renji as he glanced up, “and no, she’s weird, like I heard someone say that she’s actually a robot in a human body…”

Izuru frowned, “Well what about that Sojiro guy? He does karate with you right? And he’s looking our way.”

Renji made a face of disgust; he hated that guy. Sojiro Kusaka was an ass. That arrogant smirk, those dirty comments, the constant showing off; the only time Renji liked being partnered with him was during sparring practice when he’d get to show the fucker that _no, he wasn’t that good at everything, especially karate_ , and when the teacher wasn’t looking Renji often managed to get a good hit to the face in. _Oh sorry, man, it was an accident; you should really practise your blocking technique._

Besides, the loser wasn’t looking at him or Izuru at all, he was looking one row below them at little Hitsugaya. Renji snorted back some laughter, Kusaka had the hots for Toshiro, everyone knew that, but the kid never gave him the time of day and actually seemed to hate Kusaka more than Renji did. Another one of Renji’s favourite past times was casually mentioning Ichigo around Kusaka and how close he and Toshiro are nowadays and the prospect of them getting together one day in the near future.

“I have a better idea,” Renji whispered to Izuru. “Watch this.”

Renji leaned forward over his desk and reached out a hand to tap Toshiro gently on the shoulder. The boy, who seemed to have not paid his surroundings any attention and appeared to be oblivious to the stare coming from the dark haired male several rows down, looked up in brief confusion.

“Wanna join our group?” Renji asked in a crisp, clear voice, as to be heard by anyone paying the exchange any attention. “Izuru and I need a third person.”

“You want me?” Toshiro asked, eyes wide and blinking owlishly, clearly taken aback by the proposal, and Renji felt a little bad for the kid; he doubted many would have asked the boy to join them.

“Well, yeah…” Renji nodded quickly. “It could be fun?”

“Fun,” Toshiro echoed, his eyebrow raised sceptically.

Clearing his throat, Renji’s eyes briefly flicked to Kusaka whose face was reddening madly, “Yeah, why not? Izuru, me, you, we can work in your dorm, Ichigo will be there…”

Izuru, who seemed to follow Renji’s gaze to the angry brunette glaring daggers at them, started to laugh before quickly stifling it behind a terribly fake cough.

Toshiro too noticed they were being watched, and after a quick pause as he observed the furious onlooker, he agreed to join Renji’s group. Renji knew he would; he kind of had to, as his choices were so limited and the only other person who would want to be in a group with him had just snapped his pen in half in rage. Boy, did that Kusaka have some issues.

* * *

“Hey Toshiro!” Ichigo exclaimed, bouncing into the dorm room, a small book in hand. “Look what I got y-, hey, what are you guys doing here?”

Renji smirked as the strawberry stopped short having found his roommate sitting at the kitchen table with two of his own friends.

“Group assignment,” supplied Izuru as he flicked through his notes.

“Yes, we are just having some nice, quality bonding time with Toshiro here,” Renji grinned and winked subtly in Ichigo’s direction.

“It’s Hitsugaya to you…” Toshiro mumbled without looking up from his own notes.

“Oh… Okay then,” Ichigo looked dumbfounded for a second, before piping back up. “Anyway; I got this for you, Toshiro…”

The orange-haired teen practically skipped to the boy’s side, before lowering the book he’d been holding onto the young prodigy’s papers. Toshiro studied it closely, gently running his fingers over the soft covered front before opening it.

“This is…” Toshiro breathed. “Kurosaki, this is incredible. Where did you get this?”

Renji pushed off his chair, arms holding him up as he tried to get a better look at the book. _The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy,_ read the title. Renji had heard of it, of course, it was an old classic from the 80’s or something, but he didn’t know why it was so special to his young classmate.

“It’s a first edition,” Ichigo informed his white-haired roomie. “It was my mum’s. I saw it on the bookshelf at home and I remembered how you lost your copy… You practically turned this place over looking for it.”

Renji raised an eyebrow and exchanged glances with Izuru. The strawberry seemed to have a perfect memory when it came to Toshiro and yet he never remembered to bring a jacket to wear after basketball training. Flopping back into his chair, Renji grinned at how in love his friend was, however wholeheartedly he was trying to deny it. He recognised the signs from his own attempts to woo Rukia after they’d first met; it seemed like only yesterday when they had shared their first kiss at his party, but in reality, they’d been dating for almost five months now.

“Mine wasn’t a first edition though,” Toshiro responded, his eyes already skimming through chapter one. “It’s one of my favourites; I can’t believe your mother read this…”

“Yeah,” Ichigo chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “She loved it. That’s why I want you to have it.”

Broken from his retrieve, Toshiro glanced up in shock, “Ichigo…I can’t take this; it belongs to your family.”

Renji thought he might have fallen out of his chair for a moment, but as he found himself still sitting steady, he had no choice but to believe that he’d just heard the aloof boy-genius call someone other than Rangiku by their first name. _Maybe he’s ill?_

“Nah, it should be with someone who loves it as much as Mum did, and at home it only collects dust,” Ichigo argued. “She loved lending books to friends, so I think she would be happy for you to keep it. Please, Toshiro, take it.”

Sensing an intimate relationship-developing moment was occurring, Renji followed Izuru’s lead in ducking his head and pretending to write notes, trying to give the surely-to-be couple as much privacy as possible without making it more awkward.

“I-I don’t…” Renji heard the prodigy stumble out. “Thank you, Ichigo, I’ll look after it.”

”I know you will, Toshiro.”

Renji snuck a quick peak at the pair, and was surprised to see the normally cold and distant Toshiro Hitsugaya blushing. _No, he isn’t sick,_ Renji thought while failing to supress a smirk, _but_ _he has got feelings for Ichigo, though._

He quickly caught Izuru’s eye. He could tell what his blonde friend was thinking; it was, after all, exactly what he himself was thinking. _When will these two get together?!_


	12. Ship To Wreck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did I drink too much?  
> Am I losing touch?  
> Did I build a ship to wreck?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright I direct you all to the tags and particularly the one that says 'dubiously consensual blowjobs' and warn you again that this chapter contains dubious consent, and also underage blowjobs since Toshiro is seventeen here.  
> Consider yourself warned, please do not read this if these themes are upsetting for you.

Toshiro was… _drunk_. Well, probably anyway, he couldn’t really remember how much he had or why he was drinking in the first place. _There was a party,_ he thought, and he was pretty sure that he could hear music and drunken shouting coming from the dorm above, but it was pretty well drowned out by the gasps and moans of the guy he was currently snogging.

Pushed up against a wall in a dark room, with a tall guy wrapped around him, two hands under his shirt and a tongue diving deep into his mouth, Toshiro didn’t dare open his eyes to find out who it is that he was with. He’d forgotten that information.

He wished it was Ichigo though. He was still unsure as to when he’d suddenly developed romantic feelings toward the strawberry, but he had, and now he had to live with it.

Toshiro wasn’t sure of much anymore, but he was sure that the guy whose hand had just dipped below the waistband of his jeans was definitely not Ichigo. He was certain, however, that ever given the chance to find out, Ichigo would feel different. He’d be gentler, for sure, and Toshiro believed that the strawberry’s skin would feel softer and warmer, unlike the rough, calloused hands that were now groping his ass.

He felt himself getting lifted off the ground before he was slammed back against the wall, the mystery man’s hips crashing against Toshiro’s own. It probably would have hurt his back if he hadn’t been so drunk, but alcohol is numbing, and Toshiro was very glad for it. The man ground against him once more and Toshiro cracked open an eye in time to see the man throw back his head as he released a loud moan. It was too dark to see who it was, but Toshiro had his suspicions now, and he didn’t like it at all. It also occurred to him that while a rock hard arousal in the man’s jeans rubbed up against him, Toshiro wasn’t hard at all. In fact, he wasn’t the least bit turned on. Maybe alcohol is a little too numbing.

“Fuck, Toshiro,” The man groaned. “You have no idea what you do to me.”

Toshiro didn’t reply, but his suspicions were confirmed, and now he was frantically trying to come up with an excuse to get out of this situation before it escalated. But alas, the alcohol had done its job a little too well.

Hearing the thud before he felt it, Toshiro realised he had been dropped unceremoniously to the floor, and since he can no longer stand on his own, he had simply crumpled to the ground. A tight hand around his forearm pulled him to his knees as another hand ran through his hair, gripping it at the roots and pulling his head back. Toshiro gasped, but in pain because he was still not aroused, however his partner seemed to be oblivious.

“Yeah, you like it rough, don’t you, Slut?”

Toshiro cringed, although he couldn’t decide what he hated more: the dirty talk, the nickname or the slick, wet appendage that was instantly at his neck. He heard a zipper being undone, and he knew Kusaka was undoing his own fly.

“Noo, Kus-ka, no,” Toshiro resisted, although even he could hear the slur in his speech. He must have had a lot to drink.

He pressed his small palms against what he assumed – _hoped_ – was Kusaka’s chest and pushed back with as much strength as he could muster.

“Don’t be like that, Baby,” Kusaka purred as both hands gripped Toshiro’s wrists. “It will be fun. I’ll make you feel good.”

“But – Ichigo – No, I need Ichigo,” Toshiro mumbled, shaking his head, and squirming out of Kusaka’s grasp.

“Ichigo isn’t here!” Kusaka bellowed, Ichigo’s name seemed to sting him. “He doesn’t want you! He was kissing Grimmjow, remember?!”

And, just like that, Toshiro remembered exactly how he got into this situation. Kusaka had told him that he had seen Ichigo making out with Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, his blue-haired teammate on the basketball team. He remembered how that news had cut him deep, how stupid he felt for thinking – even for a second – that anyone, especially Ichigo, would return his feelings… could actually like him.

He had forgotten and now he felt as he did when he first found out – when was that? Ten, twenty, thirty minutes ago? In short, he just felt empty… And just as he had when he first found out, Toshiro threw himself back into Kusaka’s hold, just to feel something.

He only wanted to feel good.

* * *

“Dude, what are you doing?” Renji asked, a smirk on his face as he plopped down on the couch next to Ichigo.

It was well after two in the morning, and they were in Izuru and Shuuhei’s dorm, as it was on the fifth floor where the current party was happening. There were about twenty people hanging out in the dorm, most crowded around the kitchen table where Shuuhei and Ikkaku were versing each other in beer pong, and through the open door, Ichigo could see students racing up and down the hallway on miniature skateboards. The dorm across the hall had its door open too and had been turned into a sort of rave room with quick techno music and home-made lasers, and Ichigo could see his fellow boarders dancing madly to keep up with the beat.

“What do mean, Pineapple?” Ichigo glanced around the room, hoping to catch sight of his tiny roommate who he had lost about an hour ago.

“I’m talking about your boy, Strawberry,” Renji took a swig of his beer. “Look, we all know you like him, you know you like him, so why aren’t you doing anything about it?”

Ichigo choked on his beer. “Wh-what?! I-I don’t think-”

“Just go talk to him, you idiot,” Renji gave him shove. “Tell him how you feel, and then let him decide how he feels – and I’m sure he likes you too, by the way – and then bam! You will be making sweet, sweet love to-”

“Alright!” Ichigo cut off his redheaded friend, abruptly getting to his feet. “Alright, I’ll go talk to him, but I’m not making any promises. I don’t even know where he went…”

“Back to your dorm, probably,” Renji responded with a lazy shrug as he swung his legs up on to Ichigo’s abandoned spot on the couch. “He was absolutely trashed the last I saw him, Rangiku might have taken him home.”

Ichigo took a deep breath, and turned on his heel, heading back to the dorm and silently praying Toshiro would be there.

* * *

Toshiro tightened his hold on the base of Kusaka’s cock as he sped up, his mouth widening to take in more of the man’s length. His head bobbed faster, and the nails on his other hand dug into Kusaka’s thigh. The brunette didn’t notice however; he was too far gone.

Loud moans echoed around the tiny bedroom, and Toshiro wished Kusaka would just shut up. He felt like he’d been giving head for ages now; his knees hurt from the cold, hard floorboards and his jaw felt like it was cramping from staying open so long. Kusaka had been quite rough too, and not in the sexy way; he pulled at Toshiro’s snowy locks harshly, and often thrusted his hips at Toshiro, the tip of his cock hitting the back of his throat and more than once, Toshiro was sure he was going to hurl. With some miracle, he managed to keep it down, but if this was what sex was going to be like, he wasn’t sure he was going to want it… ever.

Still drunk, but mildly more aware of what was going on – he had, at least, discovered it was his own bedroom they were in – Toshiro decided that he would not be having intercourse with Kusaka tonight. _Nope, no way, not happening,_ Toshiro didn’t care how much his heart was hurting, his throat was now hurting more and he decided that it took priority. Resolving to finish off Kusaka quickly, he’d kick the annoying man out, and then do what all drunk and heartbroken teenage college students do; vomit, cry, sleep, and then hate themselves come morning. It was a good plan.

Kusaka was pretty much screaming at this point, and Toshiro began to speed up even more. He swallowed while the weeping cock was deep inside his mouth, before hollowing out his cheeks and sucking hard. Kusaka started pulling his hair again and began scratching his neck and shoulders to the point Toshiro was sure that blood had been drawn. His tongue quickly circled the head before Toshiro plunged down once more. This was his first time giving anyone a blowjob but if the sounds Kusaka was making was anything to go by, he mustn’t be half bad.

Maybe if he showed Ichigo, the strawberry might change his mind about him.

Toshiro didn’t have time to dwell on the thought though, as Kusaka suddenly screamed his name and thrusted further into his mouth. As warm, salty liquid suddenly filled his mouth, Toshiro rapidly pushed Kusaka away before he’d even finished coming, and spat the foul substance from his mouth. _Fuck_ , he’d forgotten about that part. He felt the last of Kusaka’s juices splash onto the top of his hand and knew that, even though it’s too dark to see, his bedroom floor was probably a mess. He slumped tiredly against a cold wall, clutching his burning throat and waited for Kusaka to regain his breath so Toshiro could kick him out.

He never got the chance to.

The bedroom door swung open, the light flicked on and Toshiro suddenly found himself looking into the intense, brown eyes of his roommate. Shock followed by sadness flashed in those beautiful irises, and Toshiro looked around the room to see what Ichigo was seeing. He was full dressed – thank the gods – but Kusaka’s pants were down to his knees and his softened cock was on full display. Semen was spilt all over their clothes and on the floor and if Toshiro looked in the mirror he was sure he’d find some on his face.

He suddenly felt sick, like _really sick_. His stomach was surely doing somersaults inside him and the room around him spun. His throat still stung, plus his mouth was so dry that his tongue felt like sand paper. He felt his face flush hot while a cold chill ran down the length of his body.

“Ichigo, move!” It was Rangiku’s voice. “I can’t see – oh!”

Toshiro wanted to look up at them and explain, but his heart was pounding against his rib cage and his breathing was too rapid to be okay, and then he knew a fraction too late what was about to happen.

He snapped his head to the side before spewing the contents of his stomach onto the floor. Once, twice, three times before he was sure that every drink he’d ever consumed in his life was in that puddle and he dry heaved uncontrollably in the awkward silence. His stomach still churned but it was empty now. The room still spun around him, however, and he felt himself fade. The light was on but the room was getting dark, he saw Rangiku’s feet move towards him quickly and felt her grab him as he slipped sideways – upper body heading straight for his vomit. His vision went black, but he felt her save him, pulling him back into her chest, and he heard her call out to Ichigo. And then the rest of the world was shut out from him.

* * *

“Ichigo? Are you okay?”

Ichigo looked up to see Rangiku exiting Toshiro’s room. It was almost eight on Saturday, and he was sitting at the kitchen table, frowning into his cup of coffee. He hadn’t slept very well… Or at all, really.

“I’m fine,” Ichigo croaked in his coarse morning/drinking-the-night-before voice. “How is he?”

He gave a short jerk of his head in the direction of Toshiro’s door, but it was hardly necessary; Rangiku would have known who he meant.

“Still sleeping,” Rangiku answered a little stiffly, before wandering over to the fridge to inspect its contents. “But it would have been close to dawn before he actually went into a proper sleep, so I expect he’ll be out for a while.”

Ichigo nodded. He still hadn’t fully processed the events of last night – or early this morning – and he didn’t even know where to begin. Toshiro and Kusaka? When had that happened? Were they going out now or was it just a drunk hook up? Ichigo thought Toshiro hated Kusaka; he just couldn’t understand it. It hurt so much.

He was expecting to come home to Toshiro already asleep or doing something ridiculous like studying drunk or drawing more pictures of planets, but nothing could have prepared him for what he was met with. Toshiro on the floor, covered in semen and Kusaka with his pants half off and clearly coming down from an orgasm-induced high. It didn’t take a genius to work out what had just occurred, and to cap things off, their resident genius instantly began to vomit on the floor before passing out. _What a scene._

Ichigo had frozen; his mind in shock while the world seemed to spin on without him. Luckily, Rangiku still had her wits about her as she caught the prodigy before he could land face down in his own mess. He remembered Rangiku calling his name and that brought him back; Toshiro, unconscious and covered in various human discharges, and Kusaka getting to his feet silently and pulling up his pants. Suddenly blinded with fury, Ichigo grabbed the brunette by the neck of his shirt and pulled him harshly from the room, throwing him out the dorm room door before the guy could even get his pants to his ass. He had been oddly satisfied to see the guy trip over them in the hallway.

“Never come back to this dorm again!” Ichigo had spat at him. “Don’t you dare go near him either!”

He had slammed the door so fast; he never got to see the man’s reaction.

“I’m going to kill Kusaka,” Rangiku muttered, as if reading his mind, as she dropped into the seat across from Ichigo. “I’m going to punch him so hard the next time I see him, I swear to God.”

“It takes two, Rangiku,” Ichigo growled, a bitter taste in his mouth that had nothing to do with the coffee.

He honestly wasn’t sure who he was most mad at; Toshiro for getting himself drunk and then going off with Kusaka, Kusaka himself for taking advantage of the young prodigy in his state, Rangiku for letting Toshiro get so drunk and then not keeping an eye on him, or himself, for not looking after his roommate and for not expressing his feelings early enough. Renji had warned him on more than one occasion of Kusaka’s lust for Toshiro. Maybe, just maybe, if Ichigo had confessed to the little genius, it could have been him in that bedroom last night.

“I don’t give a fuck, Ichigo,” Rangiku hissed, her gaze hardening. “He’s twenty-three, did you know that? Twenty-three! Toshiro is seventeen. That’s a six year age gap. And he was so rough; you saw the bruises and the scratches, and that’s too much. I mean, Gin was an aggressive lover, but Kusaka… I just – I can’t believe it.”

Ichigo’s fist clenched. Yes, he had seen the bruises and the scratches. Once he had returned from throwing Kusaka out the door, he found Rangiku trying to pick Toshiro up, but in her also still pretty tipsy state she couldn’t manage to hold her best friend when he was at dead weight. Ichigo stepped in and took the boy into his arms. He didn’t weigh very much at all, and if wasn’t for the events that had just occurred and the fact the boy was an absolute mess, he would have revelled in the idea of holding his crush so close.

They got him into the shower, where Ichigo held him up while Rangiku washed away the vomit, alcohol and jizz away from his face and clothes. She then removed his shirt, and it was then they saw the lightly bleeding scratches on his neck and shoulders and the already blackening bruises on his arms and back. However angry he might have been at Toshiro, he couldn’t deny that Kusaka had certainly been too rough with him. Ichigo wouldn’t have done that. He would have been gentle, especially as it was Toshiro’s first time.

The water seemed to rouse the boy a little; Ichigo had been staring into his young roommate’s face when teal irises emerged from under their lids, flickering blankly and totally unaware. Toshiro groaned and Ichigo ran his hand through his wet, snow white locks gently in order to calm him. It worked, but Toshiro had managed to utter one word before falling back asleep; “Ichigo.”

“I just don’t understand what happened,” Ichigo mumbled dejectedly, folding his arms on the table and placing his head on them. “I thought he hated him.”

Ichigo just wanted to cry, to be honest, and he wasn’t much of a crier. Scratch that, he wanted Toshiro to wake up and tell them that it had been a mistake and he really loved Ichigo, and then Ichigo would pick him up and kiss him so fiercely and passionately that no one would even remember Kusaka existed.

“He does hate Kusaka,” Rangiku responded, and Ichigo felt her reach across the table to pat his head. “Don’t jump to conclusions, Ichigo, we don’t know the full story yet. I’m not even sure Toshiro had any idea what was going on – I mean, he passed out straight afterwards, he was so out of it.”

That was a possibility, Ichigo considered, and his heart sank a little. He didn’t want it to be true because that basically meant they were now looking at a rape case, and he would rather Toshiro willingly gone off with another man than to have been forced into it. The thought made his stomach flip. As much as he didn’t want Toshiro to have feelings for Kusaka, he certainly did not want that. But Toshiro had been so incredibly drunk that it could have been a possibility. If Kusaka had forced himself onto Toshiro, Ichigo doubted there was much the young genius could have done to stop it. He could barely hold his own head up, for goodness sake.

After they had showered him, Toshiro had regained consciousness enough to hold himself over the toilet bowl as a second round of vomiting hit. Although that time it had been mostly stomach acid and dry heaving as well as what little water Rangiku managed to get into him between spells. It was just after five when they finally felt safe enough to put him into some clean clothes and tuck him in bed. Rangiku cleaned the bedroom floor, insisting that Toshiro had done it enough times for her and it was time she repaid her debt. She then decided to stay and keep an eye on him, so she donned one of his oversized hoodies and climbed into his bed. Ichigo then returned to his own room and three hours later, they were having this discussion at the kitchen table on next to no sleep.

Ichigo sighed before getting to his feet, “He’s just a kid, Rangiku.”

He wasn’t sure what he meant by that, since there was only a two year age gap between them, and he was so caught up in his own thoughts as he headed back to his bedroom for a second attempt at sleeping, that he didn’t hear her reply or see the door to his roommate’s bedroom opening a fraction.

* * *

Toshiro hated himself.

What the fuck had he been thinking?!

He curled up on his side and pulled the blankets over his head. There was no way he could ever face Ichigo again. Rangiku would understand, he knew, because he’d seen her just as bad in the past, but Ichigo… Ichigo respected him more than anyone else ever had, and now he must think that Toshiro was just some stupid, attention-seeking brat. _“He’s just a kid, Rangiku.”_ Toshiro groaned as he buried his face in his pillow. His college life was over; he should just go home to Granny’s in Junrinan.

Toshiro gasped; _Granny’s in Junrinan!_ How could he forget?!

_‘Alcohol,’_ the only smart working part of his brain reminded him. _‘You drank to forget, and forget you did.’_

Granny’s nurse had called yesterday while he was walking to lunch, she told him that Granny had taken a turn for the worse and had to be hospitalised. He immediately called the hospital and demanded he talk with her oncologist; the doctor said that she was entering the final stage of her cancer, that he didn’t know how long she had left, but she would not be able to go home again – she was too sick. Granny would spend the remainder of life (however long that was) inside the depressing white walls of Junrinan Family Hospital.

Toshiro had snapped. All the work he was doing to keep busy had exhausted him so thoroughly that he couldn’t even consider where to begin to process this information. He knew one thing, though; he needed to see his grandmother in person. He had called Momo, given her the update and told her he was going to Junrinan, and maybe she should come with him.

_“Oh Shiro, what a wonderful idea! I have no plans this weekend except to spend time with Izuru, so how about the three of us drive up on Sunday?”_

He demanded they go after classes that day, since it was Friday anyway, and stay for the weekend, but eventually they compromised on leaving the following afternoon, AKA this afternoon.

Well, on the bright side, he wouldn’t have to see much of Ichigo this weekend… But had they gone with Toshiro’s original idea and left yesterday afternoon, none of this would have even happened. Then again, if he hadn’t had the bright idea of drinking himself stupid in order to forget, he wouldn’t be in this mess either.

Toshiro heard his bedroom door opening and closing, and soon later found Rangiku under the covers with him, concerned eyes of steely blue stared at him intently.

“Hiding?” She asked. “That’s not like you…”

Toshiro didn’t respond; he didn’t know how to.

“It’s not like you to drink like that either,” Rangiku continued to comment, “and it’s definitely not like you to go off with guys, especially Kusaka of all people…”

Toshiro covered his eyes with his hand. He was so embarrassed and ashamed of himself; he just wanted to turn invisible forever.

“What were you thinking, Toshiro?” She asked, peeling back his hand from his face. “Talk to me, tell me what’s going on, you know I’m not going to judge you.”

Again Toshiro remained silent. It was taking all his will not to cry.

“Is it Granny?” Rangiku whispered, knowing full well she would be hitting a nerve; basically everything was about Granny these days.

“She’s gotten worse,” Toshiro whispered back, his eyes clenching shut as he willed his voice to stay somewhat steady. “She’s in hospital now and she can’t go home, they don’t know how long she’s got left.”

He felt Rangiku wrap her arms around him, and for the first time he was grateful for her hug. He buried his nose into her shoulder.

“That’s why you drank so much.”

It wasn’t a question, but he nodded anyway.

“It was stupid,” Toshiro croaked. “So stupid and I’ve fucked things up with Ichigo, he must hate me now.”

“Yes, it was stupid, Toshiro, you should have come straight to me or Ichigo, we could have helped you,” Rangiku informed him, it was like a reprimand but she said it so gently that it was hard to feel scolded. “I’ll drive you up if you want to go.”

“Momo is taking me this afternoon,” Toshiro mumbled, but he appreciated her offer.

“Good,” Rangiku replied firmly.

They lay there in silence for several minutes. Toshiro realised Rangiku had never addressed the second part of his problem – about Ichigo hating him – and was now positive that it confirmed his feelings. How was he going to continue to live in the same tiny dorm with the guy he was romantically attracted to but also the guy who hated him? They practically lived in each other’s pockets, how could they go on existing like that?

“He doesn’t hate you,” Rangiku supplied eventually, like she knew what he was thinking. “But he’s hurt… and worried about you.”

“He said I was just a kid.”

“Well, like I said, he’s hurting too, and he was tired, he just needs a good sleep and for you to explain why on Earth you went off with that slime ball…”

Toshiro cringed, slime ball was right.

“Why did you go off with him?” Rangiku prompted after another minute of silence.

Toshiro considered his answer. He hadn’t told Rangiku about his crush on his roommate, having only discovered it quite recently. Actually, it was when Ichigo gave him his mother’s book last week that it really hit him, but with all he had going on and always being worried about Granny, Toshiro just kind of swept in under the rug; it was a secondary issue next to his grandmother dying. Until, of course, Kusaka had baited him with it last night.

“Kusaka said that he saw Ichigo hooking up with that Jaegerjaquez guy last night,” Toshiro answered carefully,.“Do you think that was true?”

Rangiku frowned, “Who, Grimmjow?”

Toshiro nodded. Rangiku laughed, so he glared at her.

“God, no!” Rangiku giggled. “Grimmjow is as straight as they come, and I heard he has a girlfriend who’s still at school…”

Toshiro frowned now. He certainly hoped that was true, that he and Ichigo never kissed at the party, but if it was a lie, then he had been tricked by Kusaka, and most embarrassingly, he had fallen for it.

“Hey Toshiro, look at me,” Rangiku brought his attention back. “Ichigo wouldn’t do that to you, he… Well, he just wouldn’t, you’ll have to trust me on that.”

“What do you mean?” Toshiro asked, glancing up into Rangiku’s once again mischievous eyes, “What’s that look for?”

“No reason,” Rangiku sung. “But hey, why didn’t you tell me you had feelings for Ichigo?”

Toshiro choked, stuttered and with one glance at Rangiku, knew it was all over. He groaned, rolling onto his back to stare at the ceiling.

“Don’t you dare tell him.”

“I won’t, but you should.”

“I am most definitely not doing that.”

“Aww, why not?” Rangiku whined, snuggling up closer to Toshiro.

“Aren’t you paying attention?” Toshiro snapped. “He’s mad at me! He thinks I’m a kid and it would just make things more awkward than they already are!”

“Now, now,” Rangiku cooed, stroking his arm. “It’s not as bad as you’re imagining it; Just. Talk. To. Him. Tell him the truth, he’ll appreciate it. Trust me.”

“But it’s embarrassing,” Toshiro frowned. He really didn’t think Ichigo needed to hear that he had hooked up with Kusaka because he thought Ichigo was off with another guy, because he was jealous and just wanted to be with Ichigo himself.

“Hmm well, he has already seen you covered in another man’s ejaculation, as well as your own vomit,” Rangiku reminded him, tapping her finger thoughtfully against the side of her mouth. “He helped me shower you too… I really don’t think you could embarrass yourself anymore at this point.”

“Thanks.”

* * *

It was around two in the afternoon when Ichigo woke up again. He felt better rested, but the empty, hollow feeling in his chest had not eased up. Flashes of Toshiro and Kusaka together flickered in his mind and it made him feel sick. He really thought he had a chance with Toshiro and now he wasn’t so sure.

He got up, stretched and headed out into the empty dorm room. With a glance at Toshiro’s door, he wondered if the prodigy was still in there. _Probably,_ he decided, doubting that the boy would be able to go anywhere today after his performance last night. He wondered if he should go in there and attempt to straighten this out, or to demand an answer, or even just to make sure this wasn’t all some elaborate prank designed – by Renji and Rangiku, obviously – to scare him into confessing his love for the young genius. _That’s stretching things a bit,_ Ichigo thought glumly.

With a deep breath, he went to open the door.

On second thought, maybe he should knock this time.

So he did, and Rangiku’s voice answered him, telling him to enter.

She was sitting up in the bed, Toshiro’s laptop sitting on her thighs as she watched what he assumed was the latest episode of _the Bachelor_. Toshiro was on his side, facing the wall, presumably asleep or doing a good job at pretending he was.

“Ichigo!” Rangiku greeted him chirpily, mood certainly lifted from this morning. “I’m glad you’re here!”

“He asleep?” Ichigo asked, gesturing to the owner of the room and blatantly ignoring her high spirits.

“Yeah,” She responded, pushing the laptop off her legs and sitting up straighter. “I’ll wake him up so you two can talk, we had a good chat this morning, and I think you’ll really want to hear his side of the story.”

She winked at him.

It wasn’t unusual, considering it was Rangiku Matsumoto he was talking to but he still didn’t understand why she was so giddy.

“Don’t wake him up,” Ichigo hissed at her, as she started to shake the boy’s shoulder.

“I have to soon, anyway,” Rangiku answered him, her smile dropping. “Momo is coming to get him in an hour and they’re going to see Granny… She’s in hospital, now.”

“What?!” Ichigo asked. He knew Granny had been living at home with twenty-four hour care from those home-care nurses, so for her to be in hospital now… It wasn’t a good sign. She’d have to be, for lack of a better term, ‘on her way out’. _Oh shit,_ Ichigo thought, Toshiro must be devastated.

He didn’t get to think much more about it, because the next thing he knew, Toshiro was awake and staring at him, nervously playing with his hands, and Rangiku was walking past him, straight out the door.

“I want an honest conversation,” She announced over her shoulder. “From both of you.”

And with that, the door was closed behind her, and Ichigo stood awkwardly in the room where all hell had broken loose the previous night; alone with nobody but the cause of his problems, Toshiro Hitsugaya.

“Hey…” Ichigo said, not sure how else to begin.

“Hello,” was the stiff reply.

A couple of beats of uncomfortable silence passed before Ichigo decided to take a seat on the end of the bed. _This could take a while…_

“So… Uh, how are you feeling?”

This conversation was going nowhere fast.

“Fine,” Toshiro answered. “Better than I expected anyway.”

“You probably got most of it out last night,” Ichigo mused; he always tended to feel better the next morning after drinking if he had thrown it up the night before. Well, it had only happened one time back in high school, but it always seemed to work for Ikkaku.

“Yeah…” Toshiro looked down into his lap, his voice almost at a whisper. “I’m really sorry about that, I know it was stupid of me, and um… Thanks for looking after me.”

Ichigo nodded. He had seen the guilt and embarrassment swimming around in his roommate’s eyes before he had looked away. At least they were going to tackle the big issues now.

“Did you drink all that alcohol because of what’s happening with your Granny?”

Toshiro nodded slowly, “I know it was wrong. I should have come to you, but I… I just panicked and the party was happening, alcohol was there… I’m such an idiot.”

Ichigo understood, he really did. He wished Toshiro could have come to him, but even he thought he would have done the same as Toshiro if he was in his place. If his mother had passed away during his teenage years, Ichigo was sure he would have turned to alcohol too at some point. Obviously it wasn’t the smartest of choices, but when you’re that sad – and as anxious as Toshiro – brains don’t always come up with the best ideas to process that grief, not even brains like the one Toshiro has.

“I get it, it’s okay,” He assured his roommate, slipping down to lay beside him. “And Kusaka?”

Even though they were now lying down on their backs, staring at the ceiling and not making any eye contact, with a solid foot of empty space between them, Ichigo felt Toshiro stiffen.

“Another bad decision on my part,” Toshiro whispered, voice strained like every word caused him pain.

“What happened?” It almost hurt to speak, but at least Toshiro didn’t appear to have feelings for Kusaka.

“He, uh… Well, he tricked me, I guess,” Toshiro seemed to measure each word before he said it, “and I was drunk enough to fall for it…”

Ichigo remained silent, hoping the boy would elaborate. It took a whole sixty seconds – he wasn’t counting, no – for Toshiro to continue on.

“He said that you were with Jaegerjaquez…”

Ichigo frowned; him and Grimmjow? That was the most disturbing and ridiculous thing he’d ever heard in his life. Grimmjow annoyed the hell out of him; besides he had a girlfriend.

Another thought flickered across his mind and he just had to ask:

“Why did that make you want get with Kusaka?”

Toshiro shrugged, but he was so stiff that Ichigo was sure that he did, in fact, know exactly why he did what he did.

Several more minutes of silence passed. Ichigo had a feeling he knew why Toshiro was upset by the – totally untrue – news that he had gotten with Grimmjow, and why that had lead him into Kusaka’s arms, for it was probably for the same reason that Ichigo was so devastated when he found his own crush with the dark haired dick-face. He didn’t want to get his hopes up though, but he saw no better time to confess to Toshiro. He was done keeping it a secret; it was now or never.

“It hurt when I saw you two together,” Ichigo started, bravely rolling onto his side so he could see Toshiro’s reaction. “I was jealous. I wanted it to be me instead of Kusaka… I’ve felt this way for months now.”

Toshiro’s eyes widened in surprise, his head snapping in Ichigo’s direction.

“Y-you wanted…” He spluttered. “You… Y-you what?!”

“I wanted you,” Ichigo confessed, a lot calmer than he thought he was going to be when the moment finally came. “I still do. I want to be with you.”

Toshiro’s cheeks and ears were now an alarming red colour as he continued to stutter and ramble on, complete disbelief written across his face.

“What do you mean?!” Toshiro almost shouted; eyes wide and uncomprehending.

Ichigo rolled his eyes; Were they absolutely sure this kid was a genius?

With nothing holding him back anymore, Ichigo silenced the boy with a quick but firm kiss on the lips. Well, Toshiro’s lips were as soft as he imagined, even though they were slightly cracked from the dehydration of last night. He held the kiss for a short three seconds before pulling back; he wanted to see Toshiro’s reaction.

The boy blinked, staring right past him. A small hand came up to feel his lips absently.

“Oh.” He muttered, cheeks blushing beautifully.

“Oh?” Ichigo was getting a little nervous now; maybe he’d been wrong.

Toshiro brought his attention back to Ichigo, whose smile was beginning to falter.

“Don’t” Toshiro poked Ichigo’s cheek quickly. “Don’t un-smile.”

Ichigo blinked, taken aback by the abrupt move, “Un-smile?”

“Shut up,” Toshiro snapped, although it lacked any real bite. “I just need a second… Give me a moment… I need to process this.”

Ichigo raised an eyebrow as Toshiro, who had been resting up on one elbow, sunk back down onto his back, the hand closest to him tightly clutched Ichigo’s own, while the other came up to rest on his forehead. He seemed to be thinking very hard on the matter. It was weird; his facial expression kind of looked stressed, but he was still holding Ichigo’s hand. _What was happening?_

Ichigo – at a loss for what else to do – decided to wait calmly for the boy to give him an explanation by lying still and quiet and gently rubbing his thumb over the boy’s knuckles.

“I’m not… uh, not particularly good at dealing with emotional stuff,” Toshiro answered eventually, his voice the most even its been all afternoon.

“Yes, I’m aware,” Ichigo chuckled lightly. “Please, take your time.”

He kind of figured that if Toshiro was feeling any negativity about the whole situation, they wouldn’t still be holding hands. As weird as this situation was, Ichigo knew Toshiro, and therefore knew that – while a prodigy in the classroom – the kid was totally inept at processing emotions. Ichigo could almost imagine exactly what was going on in that head of his; Toshiro would be analysing every encounter they’ve ever had, trying to pinpoint the moments Ichigo might have indicated that he had a crush on him, and then he’d be weighing up his options, trying to decipher his own feelings, and probably coming up with a complete list of Pros and Cons for the potential relationship they could have. Ichigo wasn’t upset that the boy didn’t just fall hopelessly into his arms, that wasn’t him and it wasn’t the boy he loved. _Liked,_ he meant ‘liked’.

“I went with Kusaka because I was upset when I heard you were with Jaegerjaquez,” Toshiro ventured nervously after a few minutes. “I, uh, I-I wanted to be with you too.”

Ichigo smiled. _Well, that was something._

“Hey, look,” Ichigo tugged on his roommate’s hand to gain his attention. “Don’t stress about it. How about you take a couple days to think about it? I don’t want to pressure you.”

“What? No, I can… I can-”

“Toshiro,” Ichigo cut him off, and with a gentle kiss on the boy’s hand, he continued. “You’ve got other things to worry about right now. I’m not upset, I’m not offended. Take the time to decide.”

At the moment, Toshiro’s phone began to ring.

“That’ll probably be Momo,” Ichigo said, slipping out of the bed and noting how Toshiro almost didn’t let go of his hand. “I’ll be out in the living room.”

He gave Toshiro a quick peck on the cheek, before heading out into the dorm, his heart lighter than it had been in months.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that I keep forgetting to update :(


	13. Junrinan (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ichigo and Rangiku travel to Junrinan to be with Toshiro - and to say goodbye to Granny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feb 2021: I AM STILL UPDATING!
> 
> I backdated this work to 2016 when I wrote it because I didn't want it appearing with my most recent works, but I can assure you all I am definitely still updating! The whole thing is written, I just don't get a lot of time to edit, hence why chapters are going up one by one.

Ichigo drummed the steering wheel anxiously. Getting stuck in traffic this early on a Sunday morning was not where he wanted to be right now, but alas, an accident several kilometres ahead was causing quite the queue on this double-lane road. At first traffic was crawling along, but now it had come to a complete stop. In fact, Ichigo had killed the engine about fifteen minutes ago and nothing had changed.

The passenger door of his car was opened and Rangiku slipped back into her seat. She handed him a hot cup of coffee and a questionable-looking sandwich.

“There is a gas station just around the bend up there,” She informed him as she sipped on her own coffee. “Not a great selection, mind you, and just about everyone on this road is in there.”

“Did you find out anything about the crash?” Ichigo asked, once again checking the time on his watch; he was hoping to be in Junrinan by now, but they were barely half way there.

“A truck driver lost control and crashed,” She told him. “No fatalities, thankfully, but the truck rolled and it’s blocking the entire road. It was one of those big semi-trailers; I don’t know how they’ll even begin to clear it.”

Ichigo groaned and slumped back in his seat, “Have you heard from Toshiro?”

“Not answering,” Rangiku replied. “Neither is Momo. You?”

“Nope.”

Ichigo sighed. He thought back to the previous afternoon; he couldn’t believe it had only been nineteen hours since he had spoken to Toshiro last, to when he had kissed him and to when he had confessed his feelings. Nineteen hours since he had walked out the bedroom door, Toshiro’s phone ringing behind him and a warm tingle lingering on his lips…

* * *

_Rangiku pounced on him immediately._

_“So… How’d it go?”_

_Ichigo jumped back in shock; he’d completely forgotten she was still here. Was she ever going to go home?_

_“Good,” He smiled. “Really good.”_

_Rangiku squealed. “Are you together now then?”_

_“No,” Ichigo replied. “Not yet, anyway. I’m giving him time to think about it; I want him to make a decision he is confident with, and with Granny so sick, I’m not sure he’s in the best place to make that decision right now.”_

_Rangiku pouted._

_“But it’s all out in the open now,” Ichigo continued, his happiness flowing through his voice, “and he didn’t recoil when I kissed him, so I’d say we’re off to a good start.”_

_“You kissed him?!” Rangiku screamed, grabbing Ichigo’s shoulders and jumping up and down excitedly in front of him – an action, by the way, that a big breasted girl like her really shouldn’t do._

_“It was just a peck,” Ichigo rolled his eyes and slipped from her grasp. “Nothing too special.”_

_Rangiku looked like she might faint before she slumped tiredly into the nearest chair; honestly, you’d think she’d just run a half marathon or something. Ichigo flicked on the kettle, humming happily to himself, and set up three mugs on the counter. Toshiro might want a tea before he goes._

_Ichigo plopped the steaming mugs on the table and was just about to sit down when Toshiro exited the bedroom. He looked up with a smile at his young roommate and hopefully soon-to-be boyfriend, but when he saw Toshiro’s appearance, his grin completely dropped off his face._

_“Toshiro?”_

_The boy was whiter than his own hair, and his eyes were full of tears that were threatening to fall any second now._

_“It was the hospital that just called,” He answered, his voice breaking and Ichigo was at his side in an instant. “The cancer has spread to Granny’s brain. Sh-she had a seizure. She can’t breathe properly. They… They don’t expect her to make it through the weekend.”_

_Ichigo drew the boy into his chest as he finally broke down. Ichigo himself began to tear up. Rangiku was gone too, but she pulled out her phone and turned to Ichigo._

_“Stay with him,” She said. “I’ll call Momo; he needs to be with Granny now.”_

* * *

“I’ll try Izuru,” Ichigo announced, gritting his teeth and fishing his phone out of his pocket.

He should have gone up with them yesterday. As it was, the only reason he stayed back was because Toshiro asked him too. They were about three weeks shy of the winter break, but since the new semester had begun in October, most students were finished with the first round of assignments, including Ichigo, so he would be able to afford to miss a week of classes to be in Junrinan with Toshiro. KTU’s youngest student, however, still had a couple of assignments to submit, and had asked Ichigo to hand them in on his behalf – easy now that everything was submitted electronically. A couple of clicks on Toshiro’s laptop and Ichigo was done. He and Rangiku had decided to head up early the next morning; Ichigo just hoped to be there when Granny finally passed. He didn’t want Toshiro to be alone.

_“Hello?”_ Izuru picked up!

“Izuru! It’s me,” Ichigo sighed in relief. “How are things there? Ran and I are stuck in traffic and we haven’t been able to get through to Toshiro or Momo.”

_“Things aren’t great here,”_ Izuru admitted. _“Granny is only getting worse. Momo’s phone is… uh, broken… and Hitsugaya left his phone here – he’s at the hospital with Granny right now, so that’s probably why you haven’t been able to contact them today...”_

“Oh,” Ichigo frowned; he felt like there was something Izuru wasn’t saying. “Is that all?”

_“Uh no,”_ Izuru was whispering now. _“Look, you guys need to get here soon. Momo and Hitsugaya haven’t stopped arguing since we got here and it’s getting out of hand now.”_

“They’re fighting?” Ichigo asked. “About what?”

_“Everything,”_ Izuru sighed, _“Just get here as soon as you can.”_

Ichigo wanted to ask more but he had to wrap up his phone call because it looked like traffic was finally about to move. Hanging up, he quickly put away his phone, placed his coffee in the centre console and turned the engine back on. It was slow going at first, but eventually they got passed the scene of the crash; Police had set up a path for the cars to follow around the truck, but they had to keep alternating between south-bound traffic and north-bound traffic. It was another half hour before they were finally clear of the crash site.

What he really wanted to know was why the two cousins were fighting and what did Izuru mean by _“it’s getting out of hand now”_? Momo and Toshiro were close, so Ichigo didn’t quite understand what they would… _Wait, were they close?_ Toshiro had once told Ichigo a cute story from his childhood where he and Momo were ice skating on a frozen pond, and had made it seem like they had a really tight bond, but since Ichigo had known them, he’d only seen them together two or three times. He remembered the first; Renji’s party. There had been a lot of tension there if he recalled, and he’d forgotten to ask about it. Then the only other times were at Ichigo’s basketball games when Rangiku had dragged Toshiro out to watch and they had sat with Momo who was there cheering on Izuru. Ichigo couldn’t believe he’d missed that in all his efforts to get to know Toshiro.

“Hey, Rangiku…” Ichigo ventured when they got up to regular speed. “What’s the deal with Momo and Toshiro? I feel like there is a lot of tension there?”

Rangiku clenched her jaw and made a sound that Ichigo couldn’t decide if it was a groan or a growl, but it definitely put Marge Simpson’s disapproving ‘ _mmmm_ ’ to shame.

“Well, it all started when Momo moved into Granny’s for her last year of school…”

* * *

Ichigo climbed out of his car, pulling his jacket closed and turning to take in his new surroundings. Junrinan was much smaller than Karakura Town; every house had a big front yard and a lot of space between their neighbours. The shops were all cute family-owned stores and there was a lot of greenery. A large forest stood to Ichigo’s left and he could hear the gurgling sound of a running stream nearby. It really was a beautiful town; there were no buildings over three stories and no roads with more than one lane each way. Ichigo was surprised it had its own hospital, but since all the surrounding towns were even more rural, he supposed this was probably the biggest town in the area.

He followed Rangiku across the road towards the address Toshiro had given them before he left. A small cottage style house stood alone at the end of the street. The garden looked like it was normally very well cared for but had been neglected for a few weeks; the bitter cold of late November not helping any. As they began to ascend the few steps onto the front porch, Ichigo caught a glance of a telescope poking out of the top-most window and knew instantly that was Toshiro’s bedroom. He was kind of excited actually, to see where his roommate lived; he just wished it was under better circumstances.

They knocked on the front door and a frazzled Izuru answered.

“Thank god you’re here,” He whispered, like he was afraid of being heard. “Come in, come in.”

Ichigo stepped under the threshold and it the main room of the house. On his left was a living room complete with a timeworn couch and an old pale-pink chair pointing towards an ancient television set. A traditional dining area stood to his right; a low table surrounded with cushions for kneeling while they ate, and a small kitchen sat at the back of the room. It had a small island bench in front of it and three stools underneath. Behind the dining table was a fireplace; fire already lit and doing a superb job at warming the house, Ichigo shrugged off his jacket instantly.

The Hitsugayas were by no means rich, but Ichigo didn’t think he’d ever been in a more homely house. There were framed photographs everywhere; on the walls, the coffee table, and the mantle above the fireplace. He could see old artworks pinned on the door of the fridge along with various awards and certificates. There were a number of trophies on the mantelpiece too and Ichigo couldn’t wait to start looking through them. They’d mostly be Toshiro’s, he thought, given the prodigy was so damn good at everything.

“Toshiro still at the hospital?” Rangiku asked, slipping off her scarf and jacket.

“Yeah,” Izuru answered. “Did you drive past it on your way in?”

They nodded. The hospital looked quite large compared with the rest of the town. They’d almost stopped in before coming here but Rangiku suggested they check in with Izuru and drop off their bags so they could spend longer at the hospital if Toshiro wanted to stay all day. Ichigo didn’t mind; the hospital was within walking distance of Granny’s house anyway.

“He left early this morning,” Izuru informed them. “He and Momo had a huge fight.”

“What happened?” Rangiku asked, sending Ichigo a side glance.

“I don’t know, like I said, they spent all last night arguing too, just over stupid, little things,” Izuru began, looking sketchily at the stairs leading to the second floor of the house. “I came down for breakfast and they were screaming at each other. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them so angry before, especially Momo. She threw her phone at him.”

“What?” Ichigo and Rangiku gasped simultaneously.

“Yeah, Hitsugaya dodged it of course, but then he picked it up and threw it into the fire. He stormed out straight after that, and Momo started screaming at me for not standing up for her. She’s been in her room all day and won’t talk to me.”

Ichigo frowned. Toshiro and Momo’s relationship was already on thin ice, the stress of losing Granny must be pushing it over the edge. It was probably worse that Toshiro didn’t have anyone around to calm him; maybe with Ichigo and Rangiku here, the cousins won’t fight so much.

“Maybe we should head to the hospital,” Ichigo suggested to Rangiku. “Check he is okay, and visit Granny.”

She nodded, rising to her feet and picking up her jacket.

“I’ll see if I can get Momo over there this afternoon,” Izuru said, nodding to himself. “She’ll regret it if she doesn’t get to say goodbye.”

* * *

With the help of a friendly nurse, Rangiku and Ichigo found Granny’s hospital room. It was a small, private room with bright white walls and ugly mustard coloured curtains. The artificial light overhead was almost too bright to be legal and gave Ichigo’s skin an awfully yellow tinge. Toshiro was there, sitting at his grandmother’s bedside and reading a book aloud. His voice was calm and soothing; any jitters Ichigo might have felt about visiting a dying woman instantly faded. It was just Toshiro and his voice.

And Rangiku. He had forgotten she was there until she poked him in the back and nudged him through the doorway.

They made their way cautiously over to the lone bed. Granny looked small and frail the first time Ichigo had met her, and now she was smaller and frailer. She looked like a piece of old paper; her skin an off-white colour and almost transparent, wrinkled like some had scrunched her up and then tried to flatten her back out. He could see the veins under her skin. If it wasn’t for the ventilation mask where Ichigo could see her breaths going in and out, he’d have thought she was already dead.

“What are you guys doing here?” Toshiro frowned, noticing them enter. “I thought I told you to stay, Ichigo.”

“You told me to stay and submit your assignments,” Ichigo countered, loving that Toshiro now used his first name. “I did that and now I’m here.”

“Like we were going to let you go through this alone,” Rangiku leant down to kiss Toshiro on the forehead before pulling herself up a chair.

Ichigo followed suit, before turning his gaze back on the patient, “How’s Granny doing?”

“Not well,” Toshiro grimaced. “The seizure has really deteriorated her condition. She took a few minutes to recognize Momo last night, and had no idea who Izuru was despite meeting him three or four times in the last two years.”

“And you?”

“She knew me,” Toshiro gave a half smile, “but she thought I was still in elementary school. I haven’t been in elementary school since I was ten.”

“Fucking prodigy,” Ichigo grumbled softly – as most Japanese kids were twelve when they moved on to middle school – and earnt himself a dead arm from his roommate.

“She remembered you though, Ichigo,” Toshiro continued, a light pink dusting his cheeks. “How, I’ll never know but she got excited when I mentioned your name and she asked whether you liked her cookies.”

“The best cookies ever,” Ichigo grinned remembering the birthday cookies she had baked him way back in July; he was ecstatic that she remembered him. “I must have left a good first impression, then.”

“You were hungover and smelled like bourbon,” Toshiro said, voice deadpan as ever.

Ichigo continued to smirk as Toshiro then informed Rangiku that Granny did, in fact, remember her too, but only as ‘the well-endowed girl’. Rangiku was oddly satisfied with that information and went on a long tirade about how Granny must have remembered her for her ‘beautiful looks’ and her ‘hot body’.

“Anyway, her memory comes and goes,” Toshiro continued. “She sleeps a lot and is always tired when she’s awake. She likes to hear familiar voices.”

“Was that why you were reading the book out loud just now?” Ichigo asked, nodding at the book in Toshiro’s hands.

“Yeah, I ran out of things to tell her, so I grabbed this from the children’s ward,” He answered, holding up the book for them to see. “ _Peter Pan_ was the first book I can remember her reading to me. I thought it was appropriate.”

_It’d be the last book she’d remember him reading to her._ The words were left unsaid, but they hung over their heads anyway.

“She’s always telling me to be more like Peter Pan,” the corners of Toshiro’s mouth twitched upwards as he continued. “She didn’t want me to grow up so fast.”

Toshiro gave a light chuckle and then Rangiku joined in. It rapidly escalated and soon the three of them were laughing liked they’d heard the funniest joke in the world. Rangiku snorted when she laughed too hard and that set them off even more; who knew the self-proclaimed – quote – “sexiest woman alive” sounded like a pig when she thought something was exceptionally funny? Ichigo wanted to hear Toshiro’s laugh – expecting it to be deep like his voice and his regular chuckle – but the boy’s laugh was silent. His face was laughing and his eyes spilled tears of laughter but no sound was heard until he sucked in a deep breath. For some reason, Ichigo loved it. Seeing the normally tightly wound genius laughing so hard he was silent and clutching his stomach as he struggled to breathe was _beautiful_.

The afternoon rolled on, Rangiku eventually went off to the hospital cafeteria to see what she could round up in the way of lunch and coffees. Ichigo tried to subtly drag his chair closer to Toshiro’s but the prodigy just ended up telling him to ‘move closer if you want to, Idiot’.

“And how are you doing?” Ichigo asked his crush seriously, taking his hand in his and giving it a soft squeeze.

The mood of the afternoon had been somewhat bittersweet. They had laughed and joked, and spent a lot of time ganging up on Rangiku, but under all that, Granny was still dying and Toshiro was still suffering. Granny didn’t look like she was going to last much longer at all. The atmosphere in the room was instantly drained when Toshiro’s eyes started to cloud over.

“I don’t know,” He admitted. “I don’t want to lose her, but I know there is no way around it. She’s in so much pain too; I don’t want her to suffer any longer.”

Ichigo ran his thumb over the baby-soft knuckles of his roommate. “I bet she was glad to see you this weekend.”

Toshiro nodded, “She’s lived a little longer than they predicted; they said three months but it’s closer to four now. I spoke to her home-care nurse this morning, and apparently Granny never stops talking about me and Momo.”

“She must love you very much,” Ichigo murmured softly, “to hang on so long.”

Toshiro nodded slowly, and Ichigo thought he might cry, but instead he flipped open his book to a page with a folded down corner, took a breath and said:

“I’m glad you came, Ichigo.”

* * *

Momo and Izuru arrived at the hospital as the sun ducked behind the mountains and began its’ descent below the horizon. Ichigo, Toshiro and Rangiku left to give them some space and stretch their legs. Since Granny’s home was only a short walk away, they decided to head home for an hour or so. Toshiro headed straight for the kitchen and began preparing dinner for later, while Ichigo and Rangiku collected their bags from the living room and trudged up the stairs to Toshiro’s room to set up their beds.

Toshiro’s bedroom was so much more interesting than his dorm room. Ichigo recalled the time he got caught snooping through Toshiro’s desk which held a few personal items, but his proper bedroom was much more personalised. You could tell he loved space; with two different telescopes in the room – a smaller, more portable one like the one he had at school, and a larger one which was already set up and poking out the window – educational posters of planets and galaxies stuck upon the walls along with glow-in-the-dark star stickers and even a bed spread with little cartoon astronauts and aliens on it.

Rangiku chuckled when she saw them. “I bet Granny bought these.”

It was a small room, but luckily he only had a single bed, so they could easily fit two single futons on the floor beside it. With most of the floor space now occupied, Ichigo hopped from mattress to mattress, excited to see what more he could learn about his young roommate. There was a dresser with several trophies sitting on top of it. Awards for first place in pretty much everything; academic, sports, arts, music, the list went on. Ichigo’s eyes bulged when he found one for ‘National Junior Gymnastics Competition 2012 - First Place: Toshiro Hitsugaya’, and then he found another one and another one and another one. That year he had competed in four events and came first in all of them; vault, parallel bars, high bar and rings. _Fucking prodigy._

“He used to be a gymnast?” Ichigo asked Rangiku breathlessly, out of surprise or the fact he was suddenly a little turned on he didn’t know.

“Oh that’s right!” Rangiku squealed, hopping over to look at the trophies. “Yes, he told me about that. He did it through middle school but quit before high school because he didn’t want to give them anymore reasons to bully him. He was ten.”

“Did he like it?” Ichigo asked, frowning, “Gymnastics, I mean?”

Rangiku shrugged. “Yes and no, I think. He liked that it was so disciplined and he could spend time perfecting his technique, but he didn’t really like the whole world of gymnastics, you know? The coaches want them to train all day and the mums are crazy when it comes to competition, but Toshiro just wanted to go to school. He liked gymnastics, but he loves science.”

“He really does, doesn’t he?” Ichigo grinned to himself, recalling all the times he’d asked Toshiro about his studies, starting with that night they spent looking at Saturn on the roof of the dorm building. Those already stunning teal eyes lit up with passion were a level of breathtaking that no one else could comprehend.

Continuing his exploration through the tiny bedroom, Ichigo found two graduation caps; one from middle school and one from high school. He found a large stack of science magazines and an old brochure from Karakura Town University.

“If you’re quite done snooping,” a deep voice drawled from the doorway, and Ichigo turned to see Toshiro half glaring-half smirking, “I’m heading back to see Granny before visiting hours are over if you want to come.”

_I’m going to say goodbye because we don’t know if she’ll make it through the night._

Again, the unsung words lingered, and sobered Ichigo right up.

* * *

Granny was awake when they got there. Ichigo saw the way her eyes lit up when her grandson entered the room, the way her hollow cheekbones rose up into a crooked smile underneath her ventilation mask. Ichigo and Rangiku found seats and brought them over to sit themselves beside Momo and Izuru, and Toshiro climbed on to the bed sit beside the patient, immediately clasping his grandmother’s closest hand in both of his. Ichigo was painfully reminded of how close Toshiro was to Granny and how close he was to losing her forever.

“Look Granny, Ichigo and Rangiku came to see you,” Toshiro told her, putting on a brave face and resting his head on her shoulder as he gestured to his friends.

Ichigo could see the effects of the seizure clearly; the trembling hands, the occasional twitch in her muscles, the tired expression. Granny looked weak, like she hadn’t eaten in a month. She must have accepted her defeat; her time was fast approaching and she knew it. Although once a terminal form of cancer like hers spreads into the brain, there is very little anyone can do, especially since she was too old and too frail to handle many forms of treatment.

Shakily, she pulled down the ventilation mask from her face.

“My cookies…” She croaked, her voice was barely audible and her words a little slurred, Ichigo leant forward to hear better,.“Did you eat-eat t-them, Ich-go?”

“Yes, Granny,” Ichigo beamed, “They were delicious, thank you. I shared them with my friends like you said, and they loved them too!”

Izuru instantly nodded his agreement, “They were the best I’ve ever had.”

Granny smiled back, bringing the mask back up to her mouth, taking a few deep breaths and then pulling it down again. She turned slowly to Rangiku.

“You look after my b-boy, Ran,” She coughed and struggled to regain her breath. Toshiro’s expression faltered behind her as he rubbed her back soothingly and guided the ventilation mask back to her face.

“Of course, Granny.” Rangiku looked like she was doing her best not to cry as she patted Granny’s hand, which Toshiro had just released. “I’ll do anything for him, you know that.”

Granny squeezed Rangiku’s hand as much as she possibly could in her state, seemingly happy with the answer. She took several more deep breaths into her mask, her other hand returning back to Toshiro’s grasp.

“You too, Ichi –cough– Ichigo.”

“I will,” Ichigo promised, and he would, with all his heart.

As the end of visiting hours loomed closer, Ichigo, Rangiku and Izuru found themselves saying their last goodbyes, and exiting the room to give the grandchildren time for a private farewell. They waited outside in the front courtyard, the night cold with approaching winter and the stars out. Toshiro had once told him that the stars were much more visible here than Karakura Town and he hadn’t been lying. There had to be millions up there tonight. Soon, the heavens would be getting a new star, and she’d shine brighter over Junrinan than anywhere else.

It was close to half an hour later when Momo and Toshiro came out. Ichigo was happy to see that they were holding hands, their morning argument long forgotten. Once they caught up to them, Momo threw herself into Izuru’s awaiting arms, tears streaming down her face. Toshiro released her hand and continued walking, noticeably avoiding eye contact with all of them. Ichigo and Rangiku shared a look; it was a private moment and they’d leave him to it for now.

One by one, they ambled back to the house in silence. A cold wind tore through the trees around them, and dead leaves crunched under their shoes as they walked. Lights were on in the homes of the other Junrinan residents they passed, each house with a television on, or music, or the sounds of a family laughing and chatting happily around the dinner table; all completely oblivious to the five college students trudging back to an empty house, the owner of which would never return to her home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Today is cursed.


	14. Junrinan (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro's heartbreaking childhood comes to light

Ichigo awoke the following morning, staring up into a mobile of the solar system that he hadn’t noticed the night before as the ceiling was actually quite high. It looked homemade, the Sun hanging in the centre from almost invisible fishing wire and the various planets hanging around it. There was a crisp, light breeze coming through the open gap in Toshiro’s bedroom window which had the mobile spinning slowly, the planets rotating the sun in perfect harmony.

Rangiku was still asleep and spread across both hers and Ichigo’s futons, while Ichigo found himself half on the floor. He sat up to find Toshiro’s bed vacant; the early-rising prodigy probably already up and having his morning mug of green tea. With a grimace, Ichigo wondered if the hospital had called already to tell them if Granny had passed overnight or whether she’d pulled through to today; visiting hours opened in just under an hour, maybe they’d be lucky enough to see the sick woman once again.

Pulling on some socks, Ichigo padded down the stairs and new instantly when he saw Toshiro’s empty expression that the hospital had called and the news hadn’t been good. He found his way around the kitchen quickly, and prepared two cups of tea before taking them over to Toshiro who was sitting by the unlit and ash-filled fireplace; a sombre sight for a sombre mood.

“Here,” Ichigo said, pushing the hot tea into the boy’s hands. Toshiro took it with a quiet ‘thanks’ and sipped on it despite it still being burning hot.

Ichigo’s eyes swept over the boy quickly. He looked like he hadn’t gotten much sleep last night; his skin more pale than normal, dark lines ran underneath his eyes and his hands trembled a little as he raised his tea to his lips.

“The hospital called,” the prodigy said slowly after a minute or so. “She had another seizure last night. She’s in a coma. She can’t breathe on her own at all anymore.”

“Life support,” Ichigo murmured. They weren’t up to it in class yet, but he had seen it before. His mother had been on life support.

Toshiro nodded slowly. “The doctor said her mind is most likely gone. She won’t wake up.”

“They want you to turn it off,” Ichigo sighed, remembering when his dad had tried to explain to him about what that would mean. Ichigo was eight; he didn’t understand why they would ever turn it off if it kept his mother alive. He understood now of course, that being brain dead and having a machine to keep you breathing was not living at all.

“That’s for Momo’s mother to decide,” Toshiro said calmly. “She will be arriving sometime this afternoon, I believe. They’re flying in from the States as we speak.”

Ichigo nodded. If Momo’s mother was Granny’s daughter, it’d make sense that she would have the final say over Granny’s health if Granny was no longer capable of making the decision. He didn’t think Toshiro would want that responsibility anyway; Ichigo certainly wouldn’t.

“Are you okay?” He asked, staring hard at Toshiro, he wanted to see every emotion that crossed that beautiful face.

Toshiro’s face remained as impassive as it had the first time they’d met. Ichigo recognised the signs; Toshiro was pulling back again. The boy in question shrugged.

“She’s gone,” He said, voice devoid of emotion. “Turning a machine off makes no difference now. She’s not coming back.”

“At least she isn’t in pain anymore,” Ichigo put a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

Not for the first time, Toshiro flinched at the contact, but Ichigo removed his hand instantly like he’d been stung. Toshiro hadn’t done that in weeks now – months, really – and Ichigo had hoped they were passed it; they had kissed for crying out loud!

“I’m sorry,” Toshiro whispered, realising what he’d done.

“It’s okay,” Ichigo lied. “Don’t worry about it.”

Toshiro let out a frustrated sigh, but Ichigo wasn’t sure if that irritation was aimed at him or Toshiro himself, or maybe he was just releasing some emotion now that the moment he’d be dreading had finally come; Granny was, for all intents and purposes, _dead_.

“I need to go wake Momo, and tell her what’s happening,” Toshiro muttered, getting to his feet. “Thanks for the tea.”

* * *

Toshiro disappeared sometime before lunch, but Rangiku didn’t seem as worried as Ichigo felt.

“He’s probably just walking around town, Ichigo,” she waved dismissively, “or gone back to the hospital. He’s just lost his grandmother; I think he wants some breathing space right now.”

Ichigo sighed; she was probably right. Although the last time he couldn’t handle something properly, he went and got himself totally wasted and almost ended up in bed with Kusaka. Ichigo just wished Toshiro could turn to him at times like this. Sure, Toshiro was much more open than he used to be around Ichigo but he still wouldn’t come to him when tragedy hits. It left him feeling anxious; Ichigo had been so sure less than two days ago that Toshiro would end up deciding that he wanted to be with him, but now Ichigo was questioning everything. Maybe it was just the pain that was making him draw back? Ichigo could only hope that Toshiro would warm back up to him soon. To his merit, Toshiro hadn’t minded the hand holding in the hospital yesterday afternoon, so maybe all wasn’t lost.

Momo’s parents arrived in the afternoon and Toshiro was still conspicuously absent. Momo’s mother was a perfect physical combination of Momo and Granny, like if the three of them stood in a line, it would look like a timeline of one woman’s life. She had the same big, brown eyes and dark straight hair, also pulled into a bun as both her mother and daughter often wore theirs. 

Momo was straight in her mother’s arms, crying onto her sleeve, while her father stood back quietly, a sad expression on his face. Slowly, they detached themselves and came into the house, sending their suitcases up to Granny’s bedroom where they would be staying. Izuru was nervous; he had only ever met the Hinamori’s on Skype, since this was their first time back on Japanese soil in three years. Momo had been to America a few times though, usually over the spring break between academic years.

The Hinamori’s instantly adored Izuru; Momo’s mother took him into a tight embrace and pronounced him ‘the son they’d never had’, and Momo’s father gave him a silent nod of approval and a tight hand shake. Ichigo found himself standing awkwardly beside Rangiku as they introduced themselves.

“Oh, my dears, are you Momo’s friends from college?” Mrs Hinamori asked, shaking their hands vigorously.

“Yes, we are,” Ichigo nodded. “And Toshiro’s too. He’s my roommate, actually, and Rangiku’s best friend.”

Mrs Hinamori stalled a little in shaking his hand. She instantly let him go, as if she had only just realised she’d been doing it for too long now.

“Oh. Oh yes, I forgot the boy was in university now,” She frowned.

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. He went to say something more on the topic of the woman’s nephew but Rangiku cut across him quickly.

“Yes, he’s doing very well too,” She said with a confident smile. “Topping all his subjects, in fact. Plus, he’s still doing karate and soccer, as well as practically running a small business.”

Rangiku’s boasting was a regular thing Ichigo often endured, but he’d never heard her sound so proud of Toshiro. If the white-haired prodigy had been here for that, Ichigo was certain that he’d be blushing scarlet right now. He was quite sad to be missing it, to be honest.

Mrs Hinamori smiled, although her smile seemed to be lacking much happiness. “Good for him.”

There was a beat of silence that was awkward in a way Ichigo couldn’t understand. Something was off with the way Momo’s mother spoke about Toshiro.

“And where is the boy now?”

“He should be here in a minute,” Rangiku answered and Ichigo gave her a look to see if she was telling the truth to which she responded with a sincere nod. “He was at the hospital. I texted him to let him know that you had arrived, and he said he’d come straight home.”

Right on cue, Toshiro entered through the front door, stopping abruptly in the entrance. His stance was awfully rigid as he observed his aunt and uncle.

“Aunt Hana, Uncle Hisao,” He greeted, giving a short, but formal bow to his aunt and uncle respectively. “I trust you had a safe journey.”

The whole situation was weird, Ichigo decided. First there was Mrs Hinamori’s obvious stiffness when Toshiro had been brought into the conversation, and then there was the formal bow Toshiro gave them. It was more formal than one should use for family members, even if they were your elders. It was closer to how you’d bow for the University President than you would for your aunt and uncle.

He threw a questioning look at Rangiku. She nodded in understanding, and mouthed the words, “I’ll explain later.”

* * *

Ichigo found himself sitting on the steps of the front porch, sipping on soup Toshiro had made for dinner. It was a creamy pumpkin soup that he’d made from scratch. It was freaking delicious too, and Ichigo wasn’t a big soup man. It was raining, and Ichigo had wandered outside to sit under the tin roof covering the porch, the rain drops creating a blissfully peaceful rhythm that had him relaxed in no time. He gazed into the forest across the road; it’s tall, dark trees swaying in the wind.

The three Hinamori’s had gone off to the hospital to make their final goodbyes and to turn off Granny’s life support. Izuru had puttered back up to Momo’s room to take a nap, saying rain makes him drowsy. Rangiku had agreed, sauntering off upstairs to take her own siesta. Toshiro was aggressively cleaning the oven the last Ichigo had seen him, and by the look on his face, Ichigo thought better than to interrupt. The boy genius could come to him if he wanted to talk; Ichigo wouldn’t push him today, even if he did think it was odd that Toshiro had decided not to accompany his cousin and her parents to the hospital.

_No, he has said his goodbye; he doesn’t want to do it again._

Ichigo finished his soup, but the bowl had long since gone cold in this late autumn chill, and his fingers had almost gone numb. He was about to head back inside when the front door clicked open and Toshiro ambled out. The prodigy was silent as he dropped down on to the step beside Ichigo – their arms and thighs almost touching – and there he sat, staring out at the dark forest. Ichigo could see his roommate’s breath as he exhaled.

“After her husband died, Granny was pretty lonely, so she used to visit her friends, the Shibas, every Sunday night for the better part of a year,” Toshiro informed him, his voice soft and Ichigo had to strain to hear it over the rain. “To get there, she had to walk through that forest.”

Ichigo spared a glance at the aforementioned forest; it didn’t seem like the friendliest of places. Curious as to where this story was going, he urged his young roommate on.

“Wasn’t it dangerous?” He asked. “In the forest?”

“Not as dangerous as you’d think,” Toshiro replied, his head cocking to the side as he scrutinized the woods, “There are only benign woodland animals in there, and most of them hibernate over the winter anyway.”

Ichigo remained silent, as Toshiro paused, seemingly mulling over his next words. He could feel that the white-haired male was going to tell him something serious; something that he was anxious about sharing. Ichigo leaned closer in anticipation.

“Well it was winter – early February, actually – when Granny was walking home from the Shibas place, and she thought she heard something deeper in the forest,” He continued eventually. “So, naturally, Granny decided to walk further into the trees to look for whatever it was making that sound.”

“As one does,” Ichigo commented dryly; if he knew anything at all about Granny, it was that she was very brave. “This sounds like a horror story waiting to happen.”

Toshiro chuckled, his mouth turning up at the corners, and Ichigo felt himself flush at being able to make the boy smile today of all days.

“So what was the sound?” Ichigo prompted him to continue, feeling distinctively better than he had all day. “Did she find out what was making it?”

“Yeah, she did,” Toshiro nodded, his small smile faltering. “It was me.”

Ichigo’s jaw dropped in shock; wherever he thought this story was going, this was not it. Toshiro grimaced and nodded at the strawberry’s surprised expression.

“She heard a baby crying, and found me lying in the snow in nothing but a towel,” He continued, his eye’s focusing in and out as he talked. “I was about seven or eight weeks old, according to the doctors, she took me to the hospital and apparently I almost died of hypothermia.”

Ichigo’s head spun with this new information. None of it made sense at all; how does a newborn get out to the snow? Not for the first time, Ichigo suddenly wondered what had happened to Toshiro parents. As far as Rangiku had told him, Toshiro simply didn’t have any, but obviously he would have had to have had parents at some point, otherwise he couldn’t have been born. It wasn’t the first time he thought about Toshiro’s parentage, but it was the first time he found himself questioning whether or not Granny was his biological grandmother. He had just assumed…

“Police were involved,” Toshiro went on, breaking Ichigo from his rapid thoughts. “They saw no trace of an accident nearby, there were no missing child reports matching my description, no medical records at any hospital in Japan that could have been mine… In the end, they ruled it as abandonment and attempted murder. They never found my parents.”

Ichigo’s heart had plummeted. He knew Toshiro had abandonment issues; that had been clear long ago, but he never would have guessed that it was his own parents who had caused it all. _‘People leave.’_ It had been such a simple sentence, but it had dripped with secrets, neglect and unresolved trauma. Ichigo had been stupid not to follow up on that sooner. _But then again,_ he thought, _he had to build the trust first._

“They wanted to put me in foster care,” Toshiro murmured, “but Granny demanded to keep me. And she did. I’ve been her ward ever since.”

Not having the slightest clue what to say in response, Ichigo tried again to put his arm around the boy’s shoulders. Unlike this morning, Toshiro sunk into his side, and began to nervously pull at the cords of his hoodie.

“I’ve never told anyone,” He whispered. “Rangiku knows because Momo told her. I was so embarrassed, we’d only just met.”

So many things now made sense. Toshiro’s abandonment issues, his dramatically different looks to everyone in his family, Rangiku’s fierce protectiveness… The list went on.

“Why did you tell me?” Ichigo couldn’t help but ask.

Toshiro shrugged casually. “I trust you.”

Three small words. Those were the three little words that Ichigo had been working tirelessly for eight months to hear. He thought he’d tear up right then and there for a moment, but he didn’t. This moment was still about Toshiro, and he needed to focus on that. He tightened his arm over Toshiro’s small frame.

“No matter what happens between us, Toshiro,” Ichigo spoke up. “Whatever you decide for us, I want you to know that I’m not going to leave; I’m not going to stop being your friend.”

Toshiro nodded, and mumbled something that Ichigo thought might have been a thank you. They sat in silence a little longer; the light of dusk rapidly faded and the relentless rain didn’t falter. It got colder by the minute. Ichigo stared deep into the forest, trying to comprehend how someone could leave their newborn son in the snow. There must have been a reason; perhaps they were in some sort of trouble, or addicted to drugs, or too poor to care for a child… Well, actually it didn’t matter why, because if they had cared at all they could have given their baby away safely – to a family, to a church, to a police station – but they had decided to leave their son in an empty forest in winter. There was no way Toshiro could have survived if Granny hadn’t accidently stumbled across him.

Toshiro eventually removed himself from under Ichigo’s arm. The orange-haired male didn’t mind though, he was lucky to get as long as he had and flinch free too.

“I’m scared, Ichigo,” Toshiro ran a hand through his hair anxiously. “I don’t want to go into foster care, and there’s no way Momo’s parents would agree to take me. Not that I’d go with them, I don’t want to move overseas.”

“Why wouldn’t they take you?” Ichigo frowned.

“They hate me, they always have,” He answered bitterly, kicking a small pebble off the step below them. “They never approved of Granny taking me in; they thought I was just a replacement for her husband, and that somehow Granny would love Momo less if she had a second grandchild.”

Suddenly, a whole new list of things made sense, most involving the interactions he’d seen this afternoon.

“I didn’t really want to go to the hospital with them tonight, but I felt I should go… For Granny, you know?”

Ichigo nodded, not liking where this was going.

“Well Aunt Hana said that it would be better if it was just family there, and that’s why she though it was more appropriate that I didn’t go.”

“But you are family!” Ichigo exclaimed. “You’re still Granny’s grandson whether they approve or not!”

 _“Oh no, dear, I meant just ‘immediate family’,”_ Toshiro’s voice was a scary imitation of his aunt.

Ichigo felt all his muscles tense up in anger. How dare she?! Even if she didn’t want to think of Toshiro as family, she certainly should have respected Granny’s view. It was supposed to be about the elderly woman and yet, Mrs Hinamori was making it all about herself. He could hardly believe she was the one who raised Momo; sweet, caring little Momo. Momo considered Toshiro family, she’d never hurt Toshiro. _Well, not intentionally_ , Ichigo mused, having since learnt about the tension between the two cousins and Momo’s obvious ignorance to it all.

Ichigo sat up a little straighter; he’d suddenly had a bad thought.

“Has Momo ever used it against you?” He asked the boy beside him. “Ever said you weren’t really her cousin?”

The boy hesitated just a second too long; Ichigo had his answer.

“Just once,” Toshiro mumbled, confirming Ichigo’s assumption. “Yesterday morning. That was the fight we had.”

“When she threw her phone at you, so you put it in the fire?”

Toshiro groaned, “I’ll have to get her a new one. She’s using mine until we get back to school; there aren’t any Apple stores around here.”

Upon Ichigo’s request, Toshiro told him the details of the fight. About how he had been irritated that she spent all morning on her phone while all he could think about was Granny. He had made a snide remark about her constant phone usage, and went a little too far when he suggested that she barely seemed to care Granny was dying, to which Momo bit back with “At least I’m her real family.” A screaming match began and eventually Momo threw her phone at him, screaming “Fine then, take it if you care so much!” and Toshiro had instantly retorted with “Good, you won’t be needing it today,” and proceeded to throw it into the back of the fireplace.

The two boys sat in silence as Ichigo let the story sink in. This was all so fucked; family – and Toshiro _was_ family – shouldn’t treat each other like that. He decided then, that if he ever heard Momo or her parents make any suggestions that Toshiro wasn’t Granny’s grandson, he would most certainly stick up for the small white-haired boy. Rangiku would back him up, even if Toshiro himself wasn’t prepared to put up a fight.

Toshiro rose up, preparing to go inside. He looked at Ichigo with his piercing teal eyes.

“I’m going to have an early night,” He stated with a sigh. “The funeral director is coming tomorrow, and I expect Child Services won’t be far behind.”

“Rangiku wants to be your guardian,” Ichigo informed him, hoping to relieve his roommate of some stress.

“I know,” Toshiro admitted, his eyes flicking up to the roof and something told Ichigo that he was not entirely happy about that. “Thank you, Ichigo.”

“For what?”

“Everything.”

With that, Toshiro turned on his heel and vanished inside the house.

* * *

Ichigo found that, no matter how hard he tried, he could not sleep that night. He had so many thoughts spinning around his head, it felt like he’d consumed a bucket of coffee as a pre-bed snack. He checked his phone; it was almost four, and he hadn’t slept a wink.

Toshiro and Rangiku were both asleep on either side of him. Toshiro hadn’t been down since Ichigo had returned to the room the second he heard the Hinamori’s trudging up the front steps. He wasn’t prepared to face them tonight; there was no way he could look them in the eye and make small talk after everything he’d heard that evening. Rangiku had been up when he entered the room, watching a movie on her laptop. Ichigo wanted to discuss the new developments with her, but now didn’t feel like the right time, especially not with Toshiro sleeping right beside them. Eventually, she too went to sleep, leaving Ichigo alone in his thoughts.

“Ichigo.”

Ichigo raised his head, looking over at Toshiro’s bed where the prodigy had just called his name. The bed was too high up; he couldn’t see the boy from his spot on the ground.

“What’s up?” He whispered back.

“Ichigo!” came the reply; sounding distinctly more panicked than before.

Ichigo sat up hastily, rolling up onto his knees and kneeling beside his roommate’s bed. The white-haired genius was lying on his side facing Ichigo; eyes clenched shut with his mouth and brow in a deep set frown.

“Toshiro?” Ichigo called softly, reaching out to run his hand through those ivory locks.

The boy seemed to relax at his touch; his face visibly easing into a neutral expression. Ichigo felt the corners of his mouth tug up as he continued his administrations. Toshiro rolled onto his back, muttering something that Ichigo didn’t quite catch. Apparently he was still asleep, and Ichigo allowed himself a small chuckle at the boy’s behaviour.

He continued running his fingers through Toshiro’s soft white spikes when a hand shot out and gipped his wrist hard. Ichigo yelped and almost jumped back in shock; he had to admire the quick reflexes of his roommate and the strength of his grip even in his sleep.

“Don’t go,” Ichigo mumbled, pulling Ichigo’s arm towards him.

“I won’t,” Ichigo promised, although he doubted the boy could actually hear him. “I promised you I wouldn’t.”

“Okay,” Toshiro responded, seemingly happy with the response, his grip beginning to lax a little.

Ichigo worked his wrist out of Toshiro’s loosened grip and sat watching the boy a little longer. Occasionally his eyes would flicker under their lids; a tell-tale sign of REM sleep. Ichigo briefly wondered if sleep-talking was normal for Toshiro or whether this was a one-time thing that was occurring – probably due to the stress of the last few days. He didn’t get time to ponder it long because Toshiro’s body suddenly jerked, his head snapping to the side and he awoke with a gasp.

“Toshiro?” Ichigo frowned in concern. “Are you okay?”

Toshiro reeled back in shock at finding Ichigo so close to his face. He sighed in relief as he took in Ichigo’s appearance.

“Ichigo,” He breathed heavily. “What are you doing?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Ichigo admitted truthfully. “And you started talking to me; I thought you were awake but you obviously weren’t.”

“Oh,” Toshiro mumbled, reaching past Ichigo to his bedside table and pulled back his bottle of water. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Ichigo said, a small smile playing across his face.

Ichigo watched as Toshiro took a few gulps of his water before returning the bottle to its’ spot. Ichigo leant back, preparing to lay back down in on his own futon.

“Wait,” Toshiro called, his hand instantly on Ichigo’s bicep and fisting into is T-shirt.

“What?” Ichigo raised an eyebrow.

“Would you…um, w-would you st-stay with me?” Toshiro stuttered out and Ichigo was sure he was blushing even if it was too dark to see.

Ichigo’s mouth spread into a wide grin. “Of course.”

Toshiro shuffled closer to the wall and Ichigo slid under the covers beside him. He laid back, and made himself comfortable. It was only a single bed, but Toshiro was tiny, so it wasn’t too cramped and Ichigo was rather enjoying the closeness. When Toshiro snuggled up to his side, he had to angle his hips away before he began to enjoy this too much. Ichigo breathed deeply, his eyes closed as he concentrated on the smell of rain and the steady rhythm it continued to make on the roof above them. Toshiro’s head found its way onto Ichigo’s chest, and Ichigo’s arm automatically wound around his waist. It felt right, it felt natural.

Nothing was said; it didn’t need to be. Ichigo felt Toshiro’s muscles relax against him one by one, and soon the prodigy was breathing deep and even, asleep within seconds of sharing his bed. Ichigo himself began to wind down; his mind focusing entirely on the boy at his side. It seemed that he’d finally broken down almost every barrier in his way; Toshiro now called him by his first name, let Ichigo touch him without flinching, didn’t mind the occasional hand holding and now they were cuddling in bed. The only thing left was for Toshiro to tell him he wanted them to be together so Ichigo could kiss him properly; not another three second peck, but a proper, loving kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well if you like sleep talking Toshiro, I wrote a whole oneshot about it! It's called 'Sleep Well, My Love' and it was my first ever fanfiction (as a result, it is 90% bad cliches, metaphors and similes). Would recommend if you want a cheesy read!
> 
> I hope you're all having a good week :)


	15. Mai

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro has a lot of decisions to make

It was the day before the funeral when Toshiro received a surprise visit from Ichigo’s father and his two younger sisters. He barely had time to register his astonishment when he was suddenly engulfed in a crushing group hug. It was funny; he had seen the Kurosaki family participating in the large family embrace numerous times at his soccer matches, and Toshiro often found himself longing to know what it felt like to be a part of it, expecting it to be warm and comforting, but now he knew, and it had to admit he didn’t imagine it to be so… _suffocating._ With Isshin’s chest smothering his face, Karin’s arm around his neck and Yuzu’s tight grip around his waist, he could breathe about as well as he could in Rangiku’s deadly breasts. That is to say, _not bloody much._

“We were so sorry to hear about your grandmother, Toshiro,” Yuzu said gently as the three of them pulled back and Toshiro did his best to look like he could breathe properly.

“Oh, um, thanks,” Toshiro murmured, his lungs finally cooperating, and ignoring the slight sting of yet another condolence message. “What are you all doing here?”

“We came up for the funeral,” Karin answered. “Ichigo told us it was tomorrow.”

Toshiro looked at her questioningly; they had come all the way from Karakura Town to attend Granny’s funeral? Why? As far as he was aware, they’d only met her once when she had dropped him off for school at the end of the autumn break last year, and stayed to watch his soccer match that morning.

“You’re a part of this family,” Isshin shrugged, answering his unspoken questions, “and Kurosaki’s stick together.”

Toshiro frowned, ignoring the rising heat in his cheeks; how exactly was he a part of this family? _Oh dear God, what had Ichigo told them?!_

The devil himself suddenly burst out the front door of Granny’s cottage, his orange-hair brighter in the rare sunshine they were receiving this afternoon, his skin looking that tiny bit tanner. Toshiro had to look away quickly before his blush got worse; Toshiro never used to be so affected by the strawberry’s looks, but since that damn short kiss, sustaining eye contact was getting a lot harder. The nineteen year old pulled his sisters into a quick hug and punched his father in the gut, grinning madly.

“You made it!” He exclaimed. “Traffic not too bad then?”

Isshin, doubled over and clutching his stomach in pain, grumbled his agreement, but it was barely audible as he was clearly winded from Ichigo’s attack. Karin smirked, while Yuzu patted her father soothingly on the back.

“Oh no, Yuzu,” Ichigo put on an obviously fake pout and a teasing pitch into his voice. “No Jinta today?”

“He’s coming up tomorrow with his brother and Chad!” The blonde girl replied brightly, either oblivious or choosing to ignore her brother’s sarcasm-laced inquiry.

“Wait, both Abarais and Sado are coming here too?” Toshiro questioned, turning on Ichigo before he could respond to Yuzu’s claim.

“Uh, yeah,” The strawberry smiled sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck. “Rukia too, I believe. Shuuhei, Ikkaku and Yumichika wanted to come up as well but Shuuhei has a job interview and the couple has some important kendo thing or something…”

Toshiro stared at him blankly. Why were all Ichigo’s friends coming up for Granny’s funeral?

Ichigo interpreted his look immediately. “They’re coming up for you and Momo. Believe it or not, Toshiro, but you’ve made a couple more friends this year than just me.”

Toshiro frowned; how on Earth did that happen? _No, surely not_ , he thought, he doesn’t make friends; they were just here for Momo. _Yes_ , he nodded to himself internally, _for Momo._ Jinta for him, maybe, but the rest for Momo. _Okay, much better._ That had been a close one; Toshiro Hitsugaya does not make friends.

An uncomfortable beat of silence passed and – not sure what else to do – Toshiro invited the Kurosakis inside for some tea. Yuzu and Karin immediately declined, saying they wanted to explore the town a little before it gets dark, and Ichigo gave an exasperated sigh as he was suddenly dragged off to be their tour guide. Toshiro frowned at the mischievous flicker he’d seen briefly in both Kurosaki girls’ eyes; they were up to something and that was never a good sign. Isshin was still recovering from Ichigo’s sucker punch, and gasped that he wouldn’t mind a tea.

Toshiro helped him inside and onto the couch, before hastily preparing the man a cup of tea. Rangiku was napping in his bedroom, Momo and Izuru were upstairs making a slideshow of Granny’s old photographs for the funeral tomorrow, and her parents were out sorting some last minute details. Toshiro was having very little to do with the funeral, as per the request of his aunt, but he didn’t mind too much; he had his own private plans to send Granny off. By the time he had returned to the couch, Isshin was almost back to normal. He took the tea gratefully and blew on it gently.

“Dr Kurosaki, I-”

“Isshin,” the man corrected. “How many times do I have to ask you to call me that, Toshiro? Isshin is fine.”

There was no way Toshiro was ever going to call him that.

“How are you holding up?” he asked, looking deep into Toshiro’s eyes. Toshiro had to supress a shudder; Ichigo got his soul-searching gaze from his father.

“Alright,” Toshiro shrugged, only half-lying.

To be honest, he was glad that Granny was no longer in pain and could finally rest peacefully, but at the same time, Toshiro’s world was much darker without her sunny presence and he wasn’t sure how he’d ever get over losing her. They always say it gets easier, but Toshiro was starting to think it was all a lie; he certainly wasn’t finding it any easier today. Isshin’s knowing gaze swept over him, before he nodded, seemingly to himself.

“I’ve known you for two years now, Toshiro,” He stated, sipping his tea and leaning back into the couch. “We first met when the girls brought you into the clinic with a grade two concussion, if I recall correctly.”

“Karin kicked a soccer ball at my head,” Toshiro recalled, his voice dry, “or at least, that’s what she told me. I can’t remember it.”

“Ah yes,” Isshin grimaced. “Unfortunately you weren’t her first victim, just her favourite.”

A beat of silence passed as Toshiro frowned.

Isshin cleared his throat, “Anyway, since then, I’ve gotten to know you very well, Kiddo. I coached yours and Karin’s team last year, and I have seen you at every training session and game this year. Recently, you began staying for dinner on Thursdays to tutor the girls. Good job, by the way, Yuzu got her best maths result ever and I saw Karin reading a book last week that wasn’t about soccer.”

“Yes, I know,” Toshiro’s frown deepened. “She sent me a picture of herself reading it…”

He had only started tutoring the girls to distract himself from the whole Granny situation, but he was nevertheless glad that he’d made some progress with them. Admittedly, he did enjoy staying for dinner too, although it was more than Isshin practically begged him too, as a payment for helping his daughters. Toshiro didn’t want to be paid; he felt he was benefitting from the distraction and company alone, but Ichigo’s father insisted, and as always where Kurosakis were involved, Toshiro gave in and somehow ended up liking it.

Isshin chucked. “The point I’m trying to make is that I know that you’re a good kid, you have a big heart, and you’ve become like a second son to me.”

Toshiro felt his cheeks flush; he’d never been called someone’s son before and he wasn’t sure how to react. He had known Isshin Kurosaki for a couple of years now through Karin and soccer, but he couldn’t believe that the middle-aged man would say such a kind thing to him, to actually think of him as almost-family.

“Ichigo has a lot of nice things to say about you too, you know,” Isshin continued despite Toshiro’s rapidly reddening face. “I understand how he feels about you.”

Was this a weird version of ‘the talk’? Toshiro suddenly felt very uncomfortable; he certainly was not open to having this conversation with his potential-boyfriend’s father. Luckily, it took a different turn.

“I heard you’ll be moving in with your friend?” Isshin asked, “The pretty one, with the big b-”

“No!” Toshiro cut in quickly. “No, I’m not going to live with Rangiku. I haven’t been able to tell her yet, I know she wants to become my guardian, but I can’t let her do that. She has dreams; I won’t allow her to give them up for me.”

“Noble. Smart,” Isshin commented, “but where does that leave you? Not foster care, I hope…”

Toshiro shrugged, but he knew it was the only option ahead of him now. Child Services had already called twice and were planning to drop by in the morning before the funeral. They had given him until then to find a guardian or allow them to place him in care. They wanted to have all the paperwork processed by Monday, apparently. It wasn’t giving him the greatest confidence for how this system works.

“Toshiro, I want to be your legal guardian,” Isshin announced suddenly, ripping Toshiro harshly from his thoughts.

“You want to what?” Toshiro inhaled sharply, staring into the deep brown eyes of his roommate’s father.

“I want to become your legal guardian,” the father of three repeated firmly. “Please Toshiro; I can’t watch you go into foster care.”

“Dr Kurosaki-”

“Isshin.”

“I can’t let you do that,” Toshiro once again ignored the name request. “I won’t be anyone’s burden.”

Isshin sighed, “I want to tell you a story, Toshiro. You know Ichigo’s friend, Chad, right?”

Toshiro nodded.

“Well, Chad is a lot like you, you know. He is kind, and gentle, and has a heart too big for his body. He doesn’t like to open up much either, but he stays quiet while you try and push people away. He had no parents, and lived with his grandfather. Like you, he lost his legal guardian while he was a teenager, and he had no other option but to go into foster care. I know the system has its’ good parts, but Chad only ever experience the bad. I had him on my couch two or three nights a week, and the worst was when I found him half-conscious at the clinic door. I offered to take him in too, but he refused. He ended up losing most of his friends other than Ichigo, had to repeat a grade at school and only just scraped into college because he worked so hard. He finally turned twenty last year, and now he doesn’t need any guardians.”

Toshiro didn’t know that about Chad. The large Mexican was so shy and gentle; Toshiro would never have guessed he’d lived such a tough life. His respect for the burly man rose, but Toshiro felt his own fears escalating as well. What if he did come across one of those terrible foster families that Chad did? Toshiro was looking at just over two years in the system; he’d go through plenty of different families in that time.

“You and Chad are very similar in nature,” Isshin continued. “He can box, you’re a black belt, but neither of you would defend yourselves in that situation. Toshiro, I don’t want to find you like I found Chad. Let me take you in.”

“I couldn’t do that to you,” Toshiro whispered, but his resolve was very rapidly deteriorating. He didn’t want to go into a system where kids fell through the cracks and got hurt.

“Yes, you can,” Isshin stared at him, almost pleadingly, and Toshiro saw guilt and sadness flicker in those deep brown eyes. Perhaps they were lingering emotions from all the times he’d tried to get Chad to move in. “I’m a father, I’m a grown adult, and I have a stable job and business, as well as my own home. Finances are covered through Welfare. Give me one good reason why not.”

The prodigy suddenly found himself at a loss for words. He could feel a prickle in the back of his eyes. This was all so overwhelming. Of course, Isshin had a point; he was perfectly capable of taking him in, and he wouldn’t have to give up anything like Rangiku would. Toshiro entertained the idea of moving in to the Kurosaki house. He could probably handle that, he decided; he was more comfortable around them than he was his own aunt and uncle and certainly more than random (potentially violent) strangers he’d be with under the foster care system. Ichigo and the twins would be there too...

“The girls,” Toshiro muttered, “and Ichigo; what do they think?”

“It was Karin’s idea,” Isshin grinned a little, “and of course, Yuzu jumped on board straight away. I haven’t spoken to Ichigo yet; I didn’t want to upset him if you said no.”

“You think he would want me to move in?” Toshiro asked.

“He wants what’s best for you,” Isshin answered. “He wants you to be safe and happy. That’s what we all want for you.”

“But Ichigo and I-” Toshiro blushed again. “We, uh, well, we’re-”

“I know,” cut in Isshin. “He’s told me that he wants to be with you and you’re still thinking about it. That’s fine, that’s your decision. It won’t change anything. If you get together, that’s great! If you don’t, Ichigo still wants to be your friend; he’ll still want you to stay under my care.”

“What if we got together and then broke up?”

“Then we’d cross that bridge if we came to it,” Isshin said firmly. “But as long as you don’t hurt him, I’ll be happy to have you as my ward.”

“I’d never hurt him,” Toshiro promised.

“Good,” Isshin nodded. “So, what do you say? Do I get to make up the spare room for you?”

* * *

Toshiro laid back on his bed, throwing an old tennis ball up and catching it again before repeating the process over and over. Having too many thoughts whizzing around in his mind, Toshiro decided to ignore them all, mentally going blank, concentrating only on the fluorescent ball. 

Ichigo was out having dinner with his family, who were staying at the small inn across town. They had invited him of course, but Toshiro had declined to stay home and begin sorting some of his stuff out. Isshin had given him a slight nod, and they silently agreed; Isshin would tell Ichigo at dinner, and Toshiro would tackle Rangiku at Granny’s. Instead, he decided to hide up in his room, also skipping dinner downstairs with everyone else, and neither talked to Rangiku nor began to organise his belongings.

If Rangiku came upstairs to find him, Toshiro would probably talk to her about the situation, but for the meantime, he was happy to switch off, playing with his ratty tennis ball and listening to the weird indie music that was emanating out of Momo’s room down the hall. He was beginning to feel sleepy too, and he wouldn’t have minded if Ichigo was here; he wanted to use his chest as a pillow again. Another thing he needed to think about, but it was further down the priority list for now.

Eventually, Rangiku did come to find him. She woke him up, because apparently he had fallen asleep at some point.

“Here,” She climbed up onto his bed and handed him a small bowl of chicken and rice. “I thought you might be hungry.”

Taking the bowl into his hands, Toshiro ate one bit of dry chicken before placing the bowl down in his lap. He could sense from the way Rangiku was looking at him that she was up here for a serious chat; she was probably going to tell him about her plans to become his guardian and he was going to have to tell her ‘no’. He doubted she was going to be happy about it, and he didn’t have any tissues in his room.

“So, Toshiro, I know that you don’t really want to think about it, but the fact is you need a new guardian now…” She began. Here it comes.

“Rangiku, I need to stop you right now,” Toshiro grimaced, shifting to face her and taking her hands in his. “I know what you want to do and I am so grateful that you would do that for me…”

“I’d do anything for you.”

“I know you would, you’re my best friend,” Toshiro gave her a half smile. He paused briefly, dreading the next few moments. “But I can’t let you do this.”

Rangiku’s smile dropped off her face, “What? No, Toshiro, you have to! I’m not letting you go into foster care!”

Toshiro shook his head quickly. “I’m not, don’t worry. Ichigo’s father wants to take me in.”

“Ichigo’s father?” Rangiku frowned. “Toshiro, are you sure you’d be comfortable there? You don’t know them as well.”

“I know that,” Toshiro nodded. “But I do feel comfortable, more so than I would with you.”

Rangiku looked like she’d been slapped across the face, her eyes filling with hurt, and she ripped his hands out of his grasp. Toshiro knew he had to quickly explain himself.

“Please let me finish, Ran,” He murmured, placing his rice on the window sill and crawling over to her. He put his arms around her shoulders and buried his face into her neck. “I love you more than anything; you’ve always been good to me, no matter how shit I used to treat you, and I couldn’t live with myself if I burdened you like that.”

“You’re not a burden,” her voice was laced with oncoming tears. “I want to be your guardian.”

“You want to travel,” Toshiro counted softly. “You want to start your own business and have a life, and so you should. You’re twenty-one, Rangiku, you need to live and have fun, and you can’t do that with a teenage charge.”

“We could have fun together,” She choked, and Toshiro knew she knew that she was losing this argument.

“Of course, we can,” Toshiro mumbled, tightening his arms, “but as friends, not as guardian and ward.”

Rangiku hugged him back. Toshiro smiled against her.

“And you know I don’t have fun,” He grinned. “I study, and I make you study.”

“Oh God,” Rangiku replied, and Toshiro could hear the humour coming through her voice. “Ichigo’s dad can keep you then.”

Toshiro chuckled and then Rangiku poked him in the sides. “I think I know why you want to move into Ichigo’s! Toshiro, you sly dog!”

“Fuck off.”

It felt good to hear her giggle again. Pulling back, Toshiro pulled his sleeve over his thumb and wiped away the few tears that had fallen from her eyes. He lent forward and kissed her cheek. It was the first time he’d ever done that too her, but he wanted her to know that, despite all the joking, he only wanted to do what was best for both of them. He didn’t want her to resent him later in life when she looked back at all the things she could have done if she wasn’t responsible for a teenage boy.

“You’re so good to me, Rangiku,” Toshiro whispered. “I can’t be responsible for you missing out on your dreams. I don’t want it to ever come between us.”

Eventually she nodded her agreement. They hugged once again, before Rangiku laid down and put her head in his lap.

Toshiro picked back up his dinner and ate a little more. Well that was one issue out of the way. Now all he had to do was talk to Ichigo about it, meet with Child Services, pack up all his stuff and move into the Kurosaki home. While he was going about all of that, he still had to see off his Grandmother, decide if it’s worth the risk to date Ichigo now that they were going to live together fulltime and somehow keep on top of all his studies. Piece of cake, right?

Toshiro sighed; he was definitely going to have a mental breakdown before the age of fifteen, and even that was fast approaching.

* * *

Toshiro looked around the funeral home’s front courtyard. It was absolutely packed with people. Just about every resident of Junrinan was there – which wasn’t entirely a surprise since Granny had always been an active member of the community, and most of the kids in town called her ‘Aunty Mai’ – as well as several of her old friends from out of town. As Ichigo had informed him, Toshiro spotted the Abarai brothers standing together with both Chad and Rukia. Ichigo had noticed them too, and Toshiro felt the strawberry grip his wrist and drag him over there.

“Hey Hitsugaya!” Renji greeted him with a firm hand shake and a pat on the back. “How are you doing?”

“Oh, um, I’m okay,” Toshiro answered, trying not to let his internal frown show on his face. He still found it a little weird that they had driven all the way here for a funeral of someone they’d never met.

Jinta gave him what he was sure was supposed to be a reassuring smile, and a tentative fist bump. Rukia actually hugged him, which really threw Toshiro off since he really hadn’t had much to do with the girl other than the odd times she was studying with Ichigo or had joined them in the dining hall. Toshiro still avoided the dining hall at all costs, but on the odd occasion he was there, Ichigo would always sit next to him and that often lead all of Ichigo’s friends to follow. Toshiro then felt a big hand squeeze his shoulder gently and he looked up to see the giant form of Chad staring down at him, compassion filling his one visible eye. It was the first time Toshiro had seen him since finding out about the tall Mexican’s rough childhood. Toshiro nodded to him his silent thanks, to which the Latino nodded back. Isshin was right; they were a lot alike, if only in the way they both struggled to openly convey emotions.

“Um, thanks for coming,” Toshiro eventually told them. “Momo will be happy to see you all.”

“Who?” asked Jinta.

“His cousin, you moron,” Renji snapped. “The one that’s dating my friend, Izuru.”

“Oh, the ‘friend’ that’s ignoring you now?” Jinta grinned, nudging his brother in the side and then quickly jumping out the way of his retaliation swipe with a cheeky chuckle.

“Wait, what’s this?” Ichigo asked, intervening quickly before the Abarais could get into another of their ridiculous brawls. “You and Izuru are fighting?”

“No, we’re not fighting,” Renji glared at his brother “It’s just that I hardly ever see him now. He’s always with Momo, and I’m really glad that he’s happy, but he never wants to hang out anymore. I just feel a bit cut, that’s all, since we used to be so close.”

“You and me both,” Toshiro muttered, not meaning to be heard, but Renji sniggered and chucked an arm around his shoulders.

“Why do we put up with them, eh?” the redhead joked.

“Besides, we didn’t come up here for Momo,” Rukia chimed in, leaning into Renji’s other side, “I mean, we will go see her too, but when we decided to drive up, we were thinking of you, Toshiro.”

“Me?” Toshiro asked incredulously; he was too shocked to even correct the dark haired girl on the use of his first name.

Ichigo leant over and whispered in Toshiro’s ear teasingly, “Told ya. You’ve got friends now.”

Toshiro’s eyes widen in disbelief and thinly veiled horror, and everyone except Chad laughed at his expression.

“Yep,” Renji clapped his back, and Toshiro almost tripped over from the force. “You’re stuck with us now.”

Rukia nodded enthusiastically, her eyes scarily similar to Rangiku’s when she was scheming, and Chad almost smiled. Jinta was distracted when Yuzu and Karin joined the circle, followed closely by their father and Rangiku who were having a friendly bicker over who would make the ‘coolest guardian’.

“I’d give him alcohol and porn.”

“I’ll give him free doctor’s appointments.”

“I’d let him stay up all night.”

“I’ll give him super radical dad advice! That’s what you kids say these days, right? ‘Super radical’? Or is it just ‘sup rad’ now?”

And that lead to Karin stomping hard on her father’s foot.

Toshiro was more than glad when the funeral director called everyone inside to take their seats.

The funeral service was quite lovely, and Toshiro had to admit his aunt had done a wonderful job organising it. Granny’s coffin was a pearly white, and covered in her favourite flowers; white lilies. Aunt Hana gave the eulogy, and unsurprisingly made the effort of mentioning that Toshiro was ‘not my mother’s blood, but she loved him anyway.’

Out of the corner of his eye, Toshiro saw his new friends exchange surprised looks and Ichigo subtly grabbed his hand.

“That was a bit cold,” he whispered, his jaw clenched and Toshiro could almost hear his teeth grinding.

“At least I got mentioned,” Toshiro gave a half shrug, “and she publicly admitted that Granny loved me. I’m calling it a win.”

Momo’s slideshow was played next over two of Granny’s favourite songs. Toshiro did feature much more heavily in the recent photographs and he could tell Momo probably felt bad about the dig she’d made at him all those days ago. It was a nice presentation; it started with black and white photos from Granny’s youth, pictures of her wedding and of Aunt Hana when she was a baby. There were family vacation shots, and eventually newer photos were shown. Granny holding baby Momo, Granny playing with a toddler Toshiro, working up to photograph of Granny standing between her two graduating grandchildren – Toshiro had smirked at the image, noticing that Aizen, Momo’s high school boyfriend and Toshiro’s old bully, had been cropped out – and the final picture was of Christmas day, three years ago; Granny in the middle, her arms around Toshiro – whom Aunt Hana had not wanted to be in the picture but Granny shut her down quickly – Momo holding her pet cat, Yoruichi, on their left, Hana on the right and Momo’s father standing behind them all.

Granny’s friend, another old lady named Haru, closed the service by reading a poem she had written about her. It was simply named ‘Mai’ and it was the hardest part of the ceremony for Toshiro. He kept it together though, as the poem talked about an old woman who was young at heart, who cared for absolutely everyone she met and whose soul was the purest of gold. Haru had nailed that poem, perfectly describing everything Toshiro saw in his grandmother. He’d always liked Haru; she was almost like a second grandmother, or a great-grandmother since she’d celebrated her hundredth birthday last year. She used to be a geisha back before the war, but these days, she had about three teeth and needed a frame to walk. Toshiro dreaded the day he’d have to attend her funeral too.

The funeral wrapped up, and everyone got back in their cars to attend the wake, which was to be held at Granny’s cottage. Toshiro couldn’t see where they were going to put everyone, but maybe if they didn’t mind the cold, they could spread out onto the front lawn.

Arriving back at the house, Toshiro quickly jumped the stairs to his bedroom and grabbed his supplies. He had planned to make his own private farewell, since he hadn’t expected to make any appearance in Granny’s funeral with his aunt in charge, and he wanted to get it done before everyone arrived to the wake. He jumped back down the stairs and slipped out the front door, calling back to anyone who was listening. “I’ll be right back.”

He ran down towards the forest and stopped just beyond the tree line at the narrow stream which flowed right through the middle of the forest. No one had followed him, and he was glad. As much as he liked having Ichigo and Rangiku around, he wanted to do this alone. It was just him and Granny now, like it had always been.

Toshiro spread his supplies out in front of him. He had made seven paper lanterns in Granny’s favourite colours; light mauve, silver and periwinkle blue, and used a thin wire to hold their shape. He got out some tea light candles, lit them, placed them inside the lanterns and one by one, he put them in the stream to float. It had been raining the last four days, so there was no risk of fire if one of them accidently came in contact with a fallen tree branch or something – the wood would be soaked through – besides, those tiny candles only had about thirty minutes of life in them. He had chosen the number seven as it was Granny’s lucky number, as well as her birthday, July seven, or 07/07.

The stream was drifting quite slowly today, the rain being flushed through already, and Toshiro stood back as he watched his little lanterns travelling gracefully away from him.

“Goodbye Granny,” He whispered to her. “I love you.”

* * *

“Aren’t you cold out here?”

Broken from his retrieve, Toshiro looked over his shoulder to see his impeccably handsome roommate strolling towards him, his hands dug deep into his trouser pockets.

“Not really,” Toshiro murmured when the medical science student was close enough to hear him. “I’ve never really minded the cold.”

Toshiro was standing in Granny’s backyard atop a small boulder that, when Ichigo stopped beside him, left them at equal height. It was just out of sight, so that anyone who might have been looking out a window from Granny’s house would not see him. With his back in the general direction of the house, the pond he and Momo used to skate on lay in front of him. The still water would be undoubtedly too cold to touch today, and the first signs of winter were making themselves known in the form of frost on the grass. Red, brown and orange leaves littered the yard; it was one of Toshiro’s favourite times of the year actually, second only to the middle of winter when everything was blanketed in thick snow.

He had come out for some fresh air, as Granny’s cottage was currently full of people attending her wake, all gushing about the amazing life she’d lived and what a generous soul she was. He appreciated that so many people had come to celebrate her life, but at the same time, it was rather suffocating to be in that house right now.

“How are you feeling?” Ichigo asked, circling round so that the two males were now face to face.

“Good,” Toshiro replied honestly, and felt the corners of his mouth twitch upwards. “Granny is at peace now, and I think I am too.”

Ichigo smiled back. It was the same breath-taking smile Toshiro first saw that night on the roof when they were observing Saturn; that beautiful, ridiculously perfect smile that showed the dimples in his cheeks. It was rather infectious, apparently, because Toshiro suddenly felt himself mirroring his roommate’s happy expression. _Damn Strawberry._

“I’m glad,” Ichigo whispered, giving his head a slight nod, “I know it will be a big adjustment, moving into my dad’s, but I’ll be there, and it’s only for the school breaks…”

Toshiro nodded, “It is going to be a big change.”

Two social workers from Child Services had come by that morning, and seemed quite pleased that Toshiro had found an appropriate guardian. Isshin had come by to sign through the paperwork and discuss the situation. It took about an hour, but by the end, the social workers were happy with the solution. They said they’d have the documents processed over the weekend, and Isshin was now the official guardian of Toshiro and responsible for him until the age of majority, AKA until his twentieth birthday, under Japanese law.

“Dad is driving home early tomorrow with the girls, so you’ll come with me and I’m happy to leave whenever you’re ready tomorrow,” Ichigo continued. “You’ll probably want to say goodbye to the place.”

“There isn’t much to say goodbye to,” Toshiro replied softly. “Granny will always be with me, and the rest is all just material crap. The house means nothing if she’s not there, and neither does the town. I’ll miss her, but not much else.”

Toshiro didn’t mean it in a negative way, he just meant that he didn’t love replaceable objects such as a car, or a room, or a house. A house is a house. Granny made her house a home, and Toshiro loved that, but without Granny, it was just an empty shell. He had a lot of good memories in that place, but he loved the memories, not the building itself. He could have moved fifty times over and not given a damn as long as she was there with him. They could have lived in a cave, and he’d care the same for it as he did for the cottage. At the end of the day, it was just a piece of old architecture.

Ichigo must have understood because he only nodded.

“Do you want help packing?” The orange-haired male asked. “We could do it tonight after the wake.”

“Yeah,” Toshiro nodded. “Thanks, Ichigo.”

The taller boy grabbed his hand and gave it a light squeeze. “Why don’t we head back inside. It’s freezing out here, and I think things are starting to wrap up in there now anyway.”

Ichigo made to tug Toshiro gently off the boulder and towards the house, but the prodigy quickly tugged him back. Toshiro had something he wanted to say, and something else he really wanted to do.

“Wait,” Toshiro tugged Ichigo closer until they were so close they were almost touching.

“What’s up?” Ichigo swallowed, his eyes flickering to Toshiro’s lips and back to his eyes. Toshiro smirked.

“You’ve been a really good friend to be since the day we met,” Toshiro spoke softly. “I’ve spent a lot of time calling you an idiot and – while I take none of it back and will probably call you an idiot many more times in the future – I really appreciate everything you done for me.”

Toshiro could feel himself blushing, and was rather embarrassed by it. Ichigo looked surprised, his eyebrows shooting up into his hair line, but Toshiro couldn’t stop now. He needed to get out the truth while he was feeling confident with himself.

“I want to be with you too,” he breathed.

Toshiro gripped the front of Ichigo’s jacket and pulled the strawberry towards him, firmly locking their lips together. He held the kiss a few seconds, waiting for Ichigo to respond; he was apparently in a bit of shock. Eventually he responded, sinking into the kiss and Toshiro followed him enthusiastically. It was a soft sort of kiss; one that Toshiro could pour all his emotions into and prove to Ichigo that this wasn’t just a comfort thing like it had been with Kusaka – this was real, and Toshiro had no doubtful thoughts. He really liked Ichigo, he wanted to be with the tall strawberry, and he was done denying it and making excuses. Granny wouldn’t have wanted him to spend his life alone and closed off to the world.

Ichigo, recovering from his astonishment and accepting his win, began to take control of the kiss. Toshiro felt his roommate’s hands – warm from being in his front pockets – cup his cheeks and soon open lips were moving against his. Toshiro let Ichigo in and happily accepted the tongue that followed. The kiss was full of electricity, but it never heated up. This wasn’t a hormone-crazed, lust-filled kiss; this was a loving kiss, a caring kiss, a real first kiss.

Toshiro’s arms eventually found themselves around Ichigo’s warm neck, and he felt two hands slip from his face down his sides, before resting on his hipbones. He could no longer feel the cold or hear the wind in the trees; the only thing he was aware of was Ichigo and how warm he felt against the well-built body, even with all those layers of clothes between them.

Toshiro eventually pulled back for air, and was more than pleased to see Ichigo flushed in the face and his pupils dilating, although Toshiro probably didn’t look much better himself, if not worse.

“That was…” Ichigo breathed. “So, so… So incredible.”

Toshiro found himself blushing a little as he ducked his head. Those deep brown eyes were conveying an emotion Toshiro had never seen before; no one had ever looked at him like that. It certainly wasn’t the way Kusaka looked at him, which was pure lust through and through.

“Are you sure?” Ichigo asked, hooking a finger under Toshiro’s chin and forcing him to meet his eyes.

“Positive,” Toshiro replied, his voice firm but gentle. “Definitely.”

Ichigo grinned, and Toshiro’s heart might have melted a little more. If he thought back to April and how much he had changed in the last eight months because of an idiotic, happy-go-lucky fool, he was sure that nobody could have ever predicted it. Ichigo had been a landslide of destruction in crushing each and every barrier Toshiro could have possibly put between them

“But if you don’t mind,” Toshiro continued, his voice low, “I’d like to take it slow.”

He was a little apprehensive about that bit of the deal though. He wasn’t sure Ichigo would want to take it slow after all the waiting he’d already done, but Toshiro had realised with Kusaka that he was just not ready to be so physical yet. He trusted Ichigo, he really did, but he wanted to work up to the big stuff.

“Of course,” Ichigo said, pecking Toshiro lightly on the lips. “I won’t pressure you. We live together, so I understand you’ll want your own space at times, and I’m okay with the other stuff too, I’d wait forever for you.”

Toshiro blushed, and gave a small chuckle, “You’re so corny.”

“Guilty,” Ichigo grinned.

Toshiro smiled again, hopping of the rock and grabbing Ichigo’s hand on the way past. He tugged him back towards the house.

“Come on, Idiot.”

* * *

“Are you ready to go?”

Toshiro glanced around his almost empty bedroom; all of the stuff he deemed worth keeping were packed in boxes and sitting in the back of Ichigo’s car. Admittedly, it was more than he was expecting to take with him to his new residence; he was hoping just to get away with the essentials – some of his clothes (most were still at the dorm anyway), his big telescope and his books, but Ichigo insisted on taking every trophy and certificate in his name (which took up an entire box of their own), as well as anything the strawberry considered ‘memorabilia’, AKA graduation caps, old comic books and a variety of homemade mixtapes and board games. Instead of leaving with just one box and a big telescope, they were now leaving with three boxes and a big telescope. Thankfully, Toshiro had been able to talk Ichigo out of packing the astronaut bed spread and all the baby clothes Granny had kept.

“Yeah,” Toshiro muttered; it felt weird knowing he’d never come back to his bedroom of almost fifteen years, but there was nothing to come back to, so it didn’t matter.

The two boys headed down the stairs; Rangiku was already outside in the car. Izuru, Momo and her parents were sitting around the table eating a late breakfast. Ichigo plastered on what Toshiro identified immediately as a fake smile and took the last part of Toshiro’s now disassembled telescope from his hands.

“I’ll put this in the car,” He said, and turned to Momo’s parents. “Thank you for having me, Mr and Mrs Hinamori. It was a _pleasure_ to meet you.”

“No problem, dear,” Aunt Hana replied, her smile equally forced and, as usual, Uncle Hisao remained silent. “Any friend of Momo’s is always welcome.”

Ichigo looked like he wanted to say something else, so Toshiro gave him a quick shove towards the door.

With a mental sigh to himself, Toshiro turned towards his cousin, who was looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Guess I’ll see you at school then, Momo,” Toshiro nodded to her and then to Izuru. “Later, Kira.”

“Where are you going?” Momo frowned.

“Ichigo’s,” Toshiro informed her; he hadn’t discussed his guardianship issues with her – he hadn’t really discussed anything with her this week. “His father is my new guardian.”

“What?!” She rose out of her seat and came to stand in front of him.

“Where did you think I was going to go?” He replied evenly; surely she didn’t think her parents were going to take him in?

“Well I just…” She murmured, appearing to be searching through her memories. “I forgot you’d need a new… Now that Granny is…”

“I know,” Toshiro muttered; he loved Momo, but she had an uncanny ability to forget to think about other people amongst her own troubles.

“It’s fine,” He mumbled, hugging her quickly before she could get upset. She hugged him back a little too tightly, and with the closeness, he quickly whispered in her ear. “I’ll get you that new phone when we get back.”

He released her and ignored the slight shake of her head as she began to tear up again, and turned to face his aunt and uncle, if he could even still call them that. He imagined this would probably be the last time he ever saw them, since there would be no reason for him to return if they chose to keep the house and move back to Japan.

“Goodbye Hana, goodbye Hisao,” He said; feeling no need to be so formal now that they were permanently severing ties.

Neither of them said anything in reply, although his uncle did give him a sort of nod that one might mistake as approval.

Toshiro didn’t expect any better, so he turned away and walked out the front of Granny’s door without a second glance.

Ichigo was waiting by the car, and Toshiro walked straight into his outstretched arms. He tipped his head back as the strawberry leant down to press their lips together briefly and both of them ignored Rangiku’s squeal of delight.

“Come on,” Toshiro murmured, pulling back. “Let’s get out of here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I'm more mature in how I handle Momo's character in my more recent fics, but uhhhh this isn't one of them. Apologies Momo fans!!!!


	16. A Good Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro's birthday, and finally things seem a lot happier

Ichigo awoke on the twentieth of December in a cheerful mood. There now only five more sleeps until Christmas day, and it was the last day of school before the winter break, when students could be at home with their families over the holidays. The most important thing about this day, however, was that it was his boyfriend’s birthday.

_Boyfriend_.

Toshiro was his boyfriend. Ichigo just loved to say that, in his head and also out loud to anyone who would listen.

With a dopey smile on his face, Ichigo leapt out of bed, picking up his sloppily wrapped present and skipped next door to Toshiro’s room. He opened the door and crept quietly up to the bed where his tiny boyfriend was still asleep. Ichigo took a second to glance at the clock; it was still early, he could afford another little lie down before breakfast.

Ichigo climbed onto the bed and slid under the covers. Toshiro always slept close to the wall, so Ichigo found it easy enough just to slide in from the opposite side. He snuggled up close to the young genius, whose body was very warm under the thick covers. Toshiro stirred, and teal irises eventually came out from their hiding spots. Like always, Toshiro was slow to start up, and Ichigo felt the boy tugging lightly on his shirt as he fidgeted.

“Ichi?”

“Yeah, it’s just me,” Ichigo grinned, “Happy birthday, Babe.”

“Hmmm?” Toshiro murmured, rolling into Ichigo’s chest, looking for warmth.

Ichigo’s arms wound around him instinctively, and he breathed into the top of Toshiro’s snowy locks, taking in his refreshing minty scent. Toshiro had decided he wanted to be with Ichigo almost three weeks ago now, at Granny’s wake, and he had told Ichigo that he wanted to take things slow between them for now. Ichigo didn’t mind. As much as he wanted to get physical with the guy he’d been fantasising about for months now, he knew that Toshiro wasn’t entirely ready; the incident with Kusaka probably scaring him off sex for a while. Luckily, Ichigo was a patient guy, and if he could wait eight months to hear Toshiro say ‘I trust you’, than he could certainly wait for this.

At this point, his plan was to slowly ease Toshiro into it; maybe a make out session turned a little heavy, gradually they move up to hand stuff, eventually to oral sex, and by then Toshiro might be ready to go the full mile… But Ichigo was just happy to be able to call the aloof prodigy his boyfriend, and the fact that they often did make out in the privacy of the dorm was a big bonus.

With the whole ‘going slow’ thing in place, Ichigo also had to contend with the fact that they now lived together, both at school and at home. They were going to be together in the same house or dorm every night until the start of the next academic year in April, when they would probably be assigned new roommates. Ichigo was rather delighted by the fact, but he had to be wary that Toshiro may need to have his own space at times. This was why they still slept in their own bedrooms, despite how easy it would be for them to share a bed each night. At home, they would have no choice; Ichigo’s father had been happy for them when they announced they were together, but he had made a few rules, the first of which was that they had to sleep in their own rooms. He didn’t care what they got up to at school, but under his roof, they would sleep separately, which both boys thought was fair enough.

“Come on, Birthday Boy,” Ichigo whispered cheekily. “You’re like an old computer that takes ten minutes to boot up every day.”

“Fuck off,” came the gruff reply; _Hmmm_ , Ichigo didn’t remember computers being so grumpy.

Ichigo chuckled, and kissed the top of his boyfriend’s head. A slightly more awake version of Toshiro tipped his head back to look up at Ichigo, and the taller male bent down to press their lips together. The now eighteen year old responded instantly, kissing Ichigo back slowly and deliberately.

“Happy birthday,” Ichigo breathed, pulling back with one more peck on the lips.

“Is that today?” Toshiro grumbled, rolling onto his back and pulling Ichigo’s arm to follow him.

“Yes,” Ichigo murmured, leaning down to place a few chaste kisses on Toshiro’s now exposed neck. “I have a present for you.”

Toshiro frowned, and Ichigo kissed the creases in his forehead. According to Rangiku, the prodigy didn’t really like to make a big deal of his birthday, but Ichigo had been raised in a family that loved celebrating birthdays. He wasn’t going to push the boy too far, but there was no way his birthday was going to go unmentioned. Quickly reaching behind him, Ichigo grabbed the parcel, and handed it to Toshiro, the boy sitting up slightly to inspect it.

“Did you wrap this?” Toshiro raised an inquisitive eyebrow at the terribly wrapped package.

“Shhh,” Ichigo pouted. “I’m good at hard, rectangular-shaped presents, but this was soft and awkwardly shaped and not everybody is a _fucking prodigy_.”

The last two words were empathised with a rather whiny pitch in his voice. Toshiro rolled his eyes at Ichigo’s antics, and muttered ‘idiot’ under his breath. The strawberry grinned.

“Just open it,” Ichigo chuckled, kissing the boy on the head.

Toshiro huffed and drew himself into a proper sitting up position, taking the gift into his hands and gently unwrapping it. As Ichigo already suspected, the white-haired teen was one of those people who never ripped or crinkled the gift wrap, edging it off slowly and neatly folding it before they even looked at their present.

“A hoodie?” Toshiro asked, holding up the large item, “Isn’t this yours?”

“Yes it was,” Ichigo couldn’t stop grinning, “and as my boyfriend, you’d probably just steal it and wear it for yourself. I’m saving you a step.”

Toshiro smirked a little. “How considerate of you.”

Ichigo chuckled and gave a half-shrug. “I think you’d look hot wearing my clothes.”

“Pervert,” Toshiro muttered, already putting on the old hoodie. “It’s perfect, thank you.”

Ichigo was right; Toshiro looked great in his clothes. It was a huge turn on actually, so he would have to be careful of that given they were still ‘going slow’. The hoodie wasn’t the only present he had ready to give to the young prodigy – _like he’d give his boyfriend just an old sweater for his birthday_ – but was planning to surprise him throughout the day with more gifts.

“You’re welcome,” Ichigo kissed the boy’s nose, which was scrunched up in response. “Come on, out of bed, we’re going down for breakfast; everyone wants to see you for your birthday.”

“What do you mean ‘everyone’?” Toshiro looked alarmed; Ichigo chuckled.

* * *

When they were dressed, Ichigo led Toshiro down to the dining hall for breakfast, pulling him over to where Rangiku and Chad were already eating. As soon as they sat down, Toshiro’s head was being crushed in Rangiku’s heavy chest.

“Happy birthday, Toshiro!” she sung merrily.

“Rangiku-”

Rangiku giggled while Renji and Shuuhei sniggered none-too-discretely, and Ichigo even saw Chad break into a smile.

“Rangiku!” Ichigo laughed, feeling sorry for Toshiro. “Would you kindly not suffocate my boyfriend! I just got him!”

“Hmmm? Oh!” the strawberry blonde quickly released Toshiro who immediately slumped back and would have fallen off the bench seat he was sitting on if Ichigo hadn’t caught him instantly and pulled him into his side. Toshiro was almost purple in the face and Ichigo glared at Rangiku.

“Shit, Rangiku,” Shuuhei muttered as Toshiro gasped for air. “You actually might kill someone one day…”

She shrugged her shoulders.“Bad habit?”

Everyone at the table rolled their eyes. Ichigo rubbed Toshiro’s back as the prodigy’s breathing finally returned to normal, although he flinched whenever Rangiku made a sudden movement and her boobs bounced uncomfortably close to his face. Rukia dropped down beside Renji, greeting him with a kiss, to which Shuuhei said “why don’t you greet us all like that, Rukia?” and earnt himself a dead arm. Ikkaku and Yumichika joined on too, bickering about whether ‘mint’ and ‘aqua’ were the same colour or not. Izuru plopped onto the end of the table last, passing a small package to Toshiro.

“It’s from Momo,” He said, “and me too, I suppose. She wanted me to give it to you today in case she doesn’t get to see you…”

“Oh,” Toshiro took the package into his hands. “Uh, tell her I said thanks…”

Slowly, Toshiro unwrapped the gift and Ichigo leant over to get a better look at it. It was a beanie; a turquoise one with ear flaps and a pompom on top. It would match the young genius’ eyes perfectly, and make his hair seem an even brighter white. Lucky it was winter, so Ichigo probably wouldn’t have to wait too long to see him wear it; he would look absolutely adorable in it.

“Speaking of presents,” Rangiku chimed in, pushing a large gift box into Toshiro’s hands. “Here you are, Toshiro, I picked it myself.”

Toshiro eyed the package suspiciously. “I’m not going to want to open this here, am I?”

“Nope,” Ichigo whispered, remembering what Rangiku had told him vaguely off her plans.

Toshiro immediately set down the box. “I’ll reserve my thank you until I know what’s in it, Rangiku.”

She pouted while everyone else at the table smirked, knowing exactly the type of stuff Rangiku would try and give to him.

Ichigo grinned as Toshiro was then presented with another gift that Renji, Rukia, Chad, Ikkaku, Yumichika and Shuuhei had all put in money for; a boxset of Marvel movies – Both Avengers films and the related films; Three Iron Man’s, Three Captain America’s (including the newest one), Two Thor’s and The Incredible Hulk. Toshiro was almost completely speechless – after stuttering out a thank you – and Ichigo kissed him lightly on the cheek. He knew Toshiro was still getting used to the idea of having a big group of friends and also that he was uncomfortable with celebrating his birthday, but Ichigo was very pleased at how well he was handling everything.

Although the prodigy quickly shut down any plans they had to sing ‘happy birthday’ and immediately high-tailed it out of the dining hall before Ichigo could give him his second present. Maybe he’d thought too soon…

* * *

It was back up at the dorm, in Ichigo’s bedroom, when he suddenly found himself doing his new favourite activity; making out with his boyfriend. It was the end of the day; classes were over and they were supposed to be organising their stuff to take back to Ichigo’s for the winter break, but Ichigo figured they could hang out here a little longer to avoid the Friday afternoon/start of school holidays traffic which would undoubtedly triple their journey time home. He had just given Toshiro his third present of the day; an illustrated version of the first Harry Potter book. He’d managed to locate the boy at lunch and give him the second present, which was a new wallet since Toshiro didn’t have one and was constantly losing money out of his pockets.

Toshiro loved the book, so much so that he jumped on Ichigo straight away, arms circling his neck and pressing their lips firmly together. That was how Ichigo was blessed with the current make out session they were having.

Settled above his white-haired partner, Ichigo’s hands ran the length of Toshiro’s small frame, while his tongue delved deep inside the birthday boy’s mouth. Feeling confident, he snuck a hand under the prodigy’s shirt and was rewarded with a sharp gasp as he brushed over his nipple. This was the heaviest make out session they’d had to date; Toshiro apparently letting the reigns loose a little bit. Ichigo didn’t want to pressure him, but he was curious to see how far he could venture before Toshiro started to become uncomfortable – the strawberry would back off instantly, of course; he wouldn’t push his luck, and he just wanted to know where they were at now on the getting physical scale.

Ichigo ripped his mouth away from Toshiro’s, and immediately moved to the genius’ jaw and neck. He tugged at the hem of the teen’s shirt.

“Can I take this off?” Ichigo asked cautiously as he continued to press light kisses onto the boy’s throat, and feeling for any tensing in his muscles but they remained relaxed.

“Only if I can take yours off too,” Toshiro breathed, his hands already underneath Ichigo’s shirt, tracing his well-sculpted abs.

Ichigo grinned; it was nice to know that Toshiro was as turned on as he was right now. He quickly placed a slow, soft kiss back on the prodigy’s lips, before letting the younger male pull off Ichigo’s shirt first, and then the strawberry slowly edged off Toshiro’s own shirt.

“Wow…” Ichigo whispered; his eyes completely devouring his boyfriend’s body.

He had seen Toshiro’s chest once before – when he had helped Rangiku shower him after the whole Kusaka incident – but he hadn’t been paying all that much attention; he’d been so caught up in the drama of it all, he’d failed to take in the sight in front of him. He was focused now, however, and took the time to learn every inch of the body underneath him. Toshiro had a small frame, but fuck was he ripped. He had a very well defined six pack and upper chest, as well as the slight beginnings of a developing V-line muscle over his hips. Though very thin, Toshiro was completely muscle and a hundred percent toned – even his narrow biceps were as hard as a rock. Ichigo had to bite back a moan; his boyfriend was so sexy. He shouldn’t have been surprised really, with all the different sports – including gymnastics – the boy had done in the past and the ones he still did.

Ichigo old almost felt subconscious about his own body until he saw the way Toshiro was looking at him.

Those teal eyes were dark with lust and desire, and Ichigo watched half-amused as the boy ran his delicate fingers over Ichigo’s own abs. The strawberry was very glad for all those extra gym trips he’d made recently; his body wasn’t as well-sculpted as Toshiro’s but he was bigger, especially in the arms and pecks. His V was also much more defined, and was apparently Toshiro’s favourite part of him; his small hands traced up and down the lines – it was somewhat ticklish but extremely erotic, especially the closer he got to Ichigo’s lower regions.

“You’re so…” Toshiro mumbled breathlessly, “fucking hot.”

“Says you,” Ichigo murmured back, leaning down and sucking lightly at Toshiro’s pulse. “You look like you’ve been carved by angels.”

Toshiro moaned when Ichigo dove down to swirl his tongue around one of his hard nipples. He sucked harshly on the pink bud while tweaking the other with his free hand. The young prodigy arched into him and Ichigo almost had to pause; he was so horny now, and his arousal was becoming uncomfortable in his jeans. He was going to have to stop soon, before he could get too carried away, but how could he when his little boyfriend was making such delicious sounds below him?

“Let’s have sex now,” Toshiro said out of the blue and in between moans, and Ichigo pulled back in shock.

“I thought we were going slow?” Ichigo raised an eyebrow; it wasn’t like Toshiro to change his mind so suddenly.

“Fuck going slow.”

Ichigo frowned. He thought they would have at least made it into the New Year.

“Toshiro, look at me,” Ichigo demanded, hooking a finger under his boyfriend’s chin and guiding his eyes to him; brown locked with teal and Ichigo could see it clearly – lust, desire, and the tiniest bit of apprehension. “Can you honestly tell me you are ready to have sex right here and now?”

The tiniest of anxious flashes flickered in those beautiful eyes before Toshiro eventually whispered, “No…”

“I didn’t think so,” Ichigo smiled a little bit and pressed a sweet kiss to Toshiro’s forehead. “I’m not ready either, you know.”

“You’re not?” Toshiro raised an eyebrow. “But you’re not a virgin?”

Ichigo shrugged, “I slept with a girl one time back in high school, but I hated it. I was drunk, kind of a little grossed out and I didn’t even finish. When we eventually do have sex, it will pretty much be my first time too… First time with another guy, anyway.”

Toshiro sighed, and quietly ventured. “I’m worried about how much it’s going to hurt.”

“Yeah, I’ve heard it can be a little painful the first time,” Ichigo sunk down to lay back beside Toshiro, the prodigy curling into his side. “But I’m not Kusaka, Toshiro, I’m not going to be rough with you unless you want it once we’re more experienced. I won’t complain if you want to stop at any point and I’m happy to wait as long as it takes for the both of us to be ready for it. That’s the way sex should be, especially the first time; no alcohol, no rough moves, just us together trusting each other.”

Toshiro’s head was buried into Ichigo’s neck when he eventually mumbled. “I only gave him a blowjob.”

“I know.”

“It still hurt.”

“I would never do that to you,” Ichigo whispered, kissing the crown of Toshiro’s head. “Kusaka took advantage of you, and then he was rough. I’m not him.”

“I know,” Toshiro whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise,” Ichigo murmured, and Toshiro tilted his head back to look at him. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

It was the first real conversation they’d had about the whole ordeal, and Ichigo was glad to get it out. He knew how embarrassed Toshiro had been and the guilt he still felt about, but for Ichigo, it had still hurt to think about it, so he hadn’t addressed the issue earlier. He should have though; he should have told Toshiro to stop blaming himself for it, and explained that what happened with Kusaka was not the normal way to go about sex. Drunken sex and comfort sex were two very common (unfortunately) elements in the whole college experience and growing up, but Ichigo didn’t want Toshiro to think that it was how things were supposed to happen, and he certainly didn’t want him to blame himself for it when Kusaka was the one that should have stopped things.

“I’m never drinking again,” Toshiro muttered.

Ichigo chuckled softly remembering all the times he’d told himself that. He pulled Toshiro closer and kissed him slowly. Similar to their first proper kiss at Granny’s wake, this one was full of passion, care and trust. Ichigo would never let anything come between them; not Kusaka or any other boy, not alcohol and not prematurely rushing to have sex. They were taking things slow, after all.

* * *

After their earlier make out session, and a short spooning catnap that followed, Ichigo and Toshiro didn’t arrive back home to Isshin’s until after seven when the light of day had long since disappeared. As Ichigo pulled into the drive way, he turned to his stunning little boyfriend. Toshiro was already reading through his new book, despite probably knowing it word for word since he was five.

“Just a warning,” Ichigo drawled, pulling up the hand brake and turning of the car’s engine. “My family are big on birthdays, and I’ve asked them to tone it down but who knows how much they’ll listen…”

Toshiro nodded but didn’t say much else, unclipping his seatbelt and hopping out of the door.

They made their way inside the house, and Ichigo groaned when the first thing he saw was a large home-made banner that said ‘Happy Birthday, Toshiro!!!’ and about twenty balloons scattered around the place.

Isshin greeted them first, bursting out of the living room and screaming “My boys! My boys!” Ichigo instinctively jumped out of the way as his father barrelled towards them but realised a second too late that the target had never been him. Toshiro was instantly pulled into Isshin’s chest and hugged tightly.

“Happy birthday, my new ward!” He bellowed happily. “We’re all so excited to celebrate! Come in, come in! Let’s eat!”

Ichigo released an exasperated sigh as he followed his father into the dining room, Toshiro dragged along rather reluctantly behind him. The dinner table was already set and Karin had taken a seat. Isshin sat Toshiro down opposite her before taking his normal spot at the head of the table. Ichigo sat beside Toshiro, and upon noticing how dangerously expressionless his face had become, Ichigo found his partner’s hand under the table and gave it a rough squeeze. He had a few good ideas about why the prodigy didn’t like to celebrate his birthday, and the sudden onset of a new bunch of friends and a new family probably weren’t helping any.

Yuzu burst out of the kitchen a few minutes later, carrying a large steaming dish she’d prepared for their dinner, and was soon plating everyone up like a doting mother. They ate through their meals, and Ichigo was glad that a lot of the conversation wasn’t about Toshiro’s birthday, giving the extra quiet prodigy some time to recover and adjust to his new life at the Kurosaki home. They had stayed the night after they left Junrinan but the whole thing felt like more of a sleep over; now he needed to actually face living here.

Eventually as the night wore on, the conversation did, of course, come back to Toshiro and his birthday.

“So Toshiro…” Isshin ventured, and Ichigo caught a serious look in his father’s eyes and almost sighed in relief; his dad had taken his warning on board, “I know you don’t like to make a big deal of your birthday, and trust me this is about as low key as we go…”

Ichigo saw Toshiro’s mouth turn up at the corners.

“Yes, I know that,” Toshiro murmured. “Especially after last year…”

Karin and Yuzu cracked up while Ichigo stared at them all blankly; sometimes he forgot about the prior connection his boyfriend had to his family.

“Dad and Yuzu turned up at our soccer training for his birthday last year,” Karin explained quickly, “with a three-tiered cake, seventeen balloons and a whole lot of presents. Toshiro almost went into cardiac arrest…”

“Wait – that was you!” Ichigo gasped as he turned to face Toshiro; he remembered helping Yuzu carry the giant cake to the car and praying for whoever’s poor soul was going to receive that.

Toshiro nodded solemnly over Yuzu’s giggles, “They sung ‘happy birthday’… everyone on the team joined in and so did the other parents, I thought I was going to die of embarrassment.”

“But you didn’t!” Isshin sung. “You made it to seventeen and you still talk to us!”

Toshiro raised an eyebrow. “For now, perhaps…”

Ichigo almost choked on his water; Toshiro was smiling AND joking…with his boyfriend’s father…on his birthday. The strawberry’s surprise turned to a grin and he stretched an arm around Toshiro, pulling him a little closer. He was happy that the boy was beginning to melt down his walls around his family and maybe if they showed him how good his birthday could be, they’d be able to put more effort into celebrating it in the future years

“Hey, Dad?” Karin smirked a little too cheekily. “Next year we all get parties!”

“What?” Isshin sprayed his drink across the table. “What parties?”

“We get parties on our odd birthdays, remember?” Karin continued. “Me, Yuzu and Toshiro will be turning nineteen and Ichigo will be twenty-one! That’s four birthday parties next year!”

“Three, actually,” Isshin frowned. “You and Yuzu share one.”

“We shared a womb for nine months, Dad,” Karin whined. “Don’t make us share our parties as well!”

“And it’s two parties, actually,” Toshiro chimed. “I’m not going to have one.”

“Can I have his then?” Karin bounced in her chair. “Yuzu can take ours.”

That conversation went on for some time, as Karin continued to argue her case for separate birthday parties, and Isshin tried desperately to cull the number. Admittedly, it was a scary thought now that Ichigo knew Karin liked to drink; he certainly didn’t want to deal with a whole party full of underage drinkers.

“We’ve gotten off topic, now,” Isshin tried once again to change the topic. “Toshiro, as I was saying before, since we are being low key, Ichigo has made us promise not to make a cake or sing any birthday related songs…”

“Thank goodness,” Toshiro murmured, and Ichigo reached down to kiss his hand.

“But,” Isshin continued, “he didn’t say anything about presents, so…”

Immediately there were three presents sitting on the table, all perfectly wrapped. Clearly Yuzu had been in charge of that. Toshiro sighed like he shouldn’t have expected any less and, at their demands, opened his presents. They must have planned it, because Karin gave him a new soccer ball, Yuzu gave him new shin guards and Isshin gifted him with a new jersey of the Japanese national team. Toshiro said his thank you’s and Ichigo’s family got their hugs in, which really threw the prodigy off guard and Ichigo knew he had to move things along before they pushed him too far.

He nodded subtly to Yuzu who quickly ducked back inside the kitchen.

“Toshiro, I have one last present for you,” he turned to Toshiro, and pulled both of his hands into his own. “I know that someone special couldn’t be here this year, but I know they would have wanted you to have a good birthday.”

Toshiro looked at him inquisitively, and Yuzu emerged from the kitchen carrying a plate of cookies.

“No…” The young genius gasped. “They’re not…”

“They are,” Ichigo murmured. “Well, as close to the real things as we could get. Yuzu made them, but she followed the recipe Momo and I tracked down before we left Junrinan.”

Toshiro stared down at the plate of Granny’s famous birthday cookies, speechless and unmoving.

“Babe?” Ichigo called him back to reality. “You okay?”

Toshiro nodded very slowly before eventually dragging his eyes away from the biscuits and up to Yuzu. “Thank you.” He turned to Ichigo, and almost launched himself into the berry’s arms. “Thank you so much.”

“Try one,” Ichigo smiled, plucking a cookie from the plate and waving it near his mouth.

Toshiro took the cookie, and tentatively took a bite. He’s face gave nothing away as he chewed slowly, all four Kurosaki’s waiting breathlessly for a response. Eventually the boy swallowed, and glanced around the room at the frozen family, before his mouth stretched into the most honest and beautiful smile Ichigo had ever seen.

“It’s like she’s right here,” He announced, taking another bite as Yuzu squealed in delight, and Ichigo threw his arms around the boy, dragging his boyfriend off his seat and into his own lap.

* * *

It was after 11pm when Ichigo slipped into the Toshiro’s bedroom, formerly known as the spare room, and found the prodigy reading his new Harry Potter book under the dim light of his bedside table lamp. The boy was so caught up in the story, he hadn’t seemed to notice Ichigo creep in; his eyes moving rapidly across the page from underneath his thick rimmed reading glasses.

“Which part are you up to?” Ichigo grinned, crossing the room and slipping into the bed beside him.

He was just coming to say good night, and have a quick cuddle before they had to separate into their own bedrooms. This had become a bit of a routine over the last few weeks, and was one of Ichigo’s favourite times of the day.

“Harry’s first quidditch match,” Toshiro mumbled without looking up, his delicate fingers tracing over the pictures. “These illustrations are magnificent.”

Ichigo laid down and snuggled closer to the boy, pressing a kiss to the birthday boy’s hip as he sat up reading. Toshiro lifted his arms a little, allowing Ichigo to duck underneath and place his head in the prodigy’s lap while he finished his chapter.

A few minutes past and Ichigo almost nodded off before Toshiro shifted a little, closing the book and putting it on the nightstand. Ichigo hummed when he felt those dainty fingers begin to thread through his hair.

“I’ve never liked my birthday,” Toshiro murmured from above him. “Largely because it was a massive reminder that I was born and my parents hated me enough to leave me to die in an empty forest…”

Ichigo slung an arm over Toshiro’s thighs and tightened his hold.

“Secondly, we’re not even sure if today is my birthday,” the white-haired beauty continued. “The doctors just guessed I was about seven weeks old, so they counted back exactly forty-nine days and wrote that date on my new, very blank birth certificate.”

“Toshiro…”

“Just let me finish,” Toshiro chided gently. “I thought this year was going to be even worse, because it’d be the first time without Granny… but it wasn’t bad at all. Thank you for that, Ichigo, it wouldn’t have been good without you.” 

Toshiro slid down the bed and Ichigo moved to let him in; his boyfriend coming to lie beside him, and Ichigo drew him into his chest.

“I know it must have been a bit confronting and full on with my family and the guys at school,” Ichigo murmured. “You handled it well.”

“I’m getting used to it,” Toshiro yawned, closing his eyes, “but it’s also kind of nice, having so many people care…”

“You’re going soft, Babe.”

“… Get lost.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please kudos and comment if you are enjoying this story!
> 
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> 
> Please check out my other works for other IchiHitsu AUs - I also have a new Avatar/Element-bending AU on the near horizon! Stay tuned!


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